ETERNAL
by Marc Atkinson
Summary: A Time Traveling/spiritual adventure about the search for the meaning of Life/God featuring the 10th Doctor and the 11th . What is the Truth of Yahweh? What is inside 'The Book of Life? Who is The Dark Messiah? And what is the secret of Ezikiel?
1. Chapter 1

**ONE**

"When the student is ready… The Teacher will appear"

-Ancient Axiom

"Beautiful, isn't it?"

Martin Briggs hadn't seen the man come up to stand beside him. He was too much into his own thoughts, his own world. The stranger's voice had startled him slightly but, as Martin looked round at the newcomer, he felt himself relax again.

"Yes… yes, it is… beautiful" The words left his throat as he turned back to the view. He realised that he hadn't really been taking in the scene at all. It was all just something to stare at. His eyes took in his surroundings once more, the vast, majestic landscape of the valley, the lush green of the fields and hills, the deep blue of the sky, the kaleidoscope of colour and texture that made staring at it such a joy… usually.

Except for today.

"Are you here for Nan's funeral?" Martin asked. Maybe the man was one of Nan's acquaintances from the church prayer group. Although, looking at him in more detail, probably not. He looked more like a Jarvis Cocker fan than an avid Christian. The stranger looked in his mid-thirties with short but scruffy brown hair. He was slight in frame and pale in complexion and wore a long, brown coat with a blue, collared shirt underneath. His brown, stripped trousers were finished off with a pair of white, battered plimsolls.

"Nah, I'm just here for the view", the man said as he stuffed his hands deeper into the pockets of his coat. He swung his head round sharply and looked at Martin for the first time, "But sorry for your loss and all that". His head returned to take in the view, "I come here every time I'm in the area. I love this churchyard. What a view… Nature in all its beauty… You don't get this where I come from, I can tell you that".

"And where is that?" Martin asked as he watched a swallow dive down into the valley, its wings vibrating against the strong, cool wind.

"Oh, here and there" The man moved towards the bench where Martin was sitting. "I'm The Doctor by the way," he said extending his hand.

Martin took it, it was warm from being in those deep pockets. "Martin…. Martin Briggs" he said nodding.

Martin was a sombre looking man in his early forties. He wore a grey suede coat that was tucked up high just touching the bottom of his short, dark hair. He was unshaven and his face was pale and a lighter shade of grey.

"Budge up then, Marty" The Doctor said, "There's room on there for a small one". He lifted his coat tails up and sat down beside Martin who had moved further along to the left hand side of the bench.

The Doctor took in a deep lungful of the fresh, cutting air, held it for about two seconds and then let it out in a long, appreciative breath. "Aaahhhhhh….. I love it…. Puts hairs on your chest this does". He lifted the top of his shirt lapel open and peered inside. "At least, I'm hoping it does. This body's not been blessed with two many macho elements". He broke off as in deep in thought. "You know", he said, his voice almost a whisper, "I don't think I've ever used the word 'macho' before…" He frowned intently almost like he was disappointed in himself, "Or been worried about having hairs on my chest". He pushed himself back sharply and spread himself leisurely on the bench. "Ah well…", he said his voice back to it's usual pitch, "At least the view's good".

Martin laughed at The Doctor's relaxed air. He realised it was the first time he had even smiled for over a week.

"So what are you a doctor of exactly?" he asked. The stranger had intrigued him even though he should really be a little annoyed at him for his flippant attitude. After all, Martin had just buried his Nan.

"Oh, this and that" The Doctor said in a disregarding manner, "Mainly 'that' to be honest… Although I _do _do a fair amount of 'this' as well". He turned to look Martin directly in the eyes, "So then… your Nan…. What was her story?"

Martin should have been shocked by The Doctor's abruptness but, strangely, he wasn't. He breathed out slowly.

"Cancer…" Martin said flatly, "It was cancer. She was diagnosed just over six months ago. She died last week. She was a beautiful woman… Always had a smile for everyone. She never had anything bad to say about anyone or anything. She was a God-fearing woman and had been all her life." Martin turned his face back to the valley, "And God certainly let her down at the end," he said quietly. His eyes began to sting again.

"So that's why you're out here?" The Doctor asked gently, although it was more like a statement, "You're looking for answers in the wind".

"Oh, I'm not looking for answers" Martin said harshly, "Because I know there's no one to give me answers. Life is cruel…. God is a lie… a fictitious story made up by men who wanted to rule with control through fear and order, a fairy tale told to kids to stop them going mad at the thought of death, an ultimate authority figure that you're never allowed to question and you must obey even if none of it makes any sense." He realised his voice was raised but he didn't really care, "Well, I've had enough of 'God'. He never helped my Nan even though I begged Him to. He wasn't there when I needed Him, so I don't intend on being there for him". He stood up sharply and walked forwards, his hands clasped at the top of his head.

The Doctor remained seated but leaned forward with his elbows resting on his knees, his hands interlocked.

The two men remained silent for over a minute both watching the shadows created by the big, fluffy clouds moving slowly along the valley floor below.

"So what's your take then, Doctor?" Martin said eventually without looking round. His voice was calm again and his hands were clutching at a folded hymn sheet. "Where do you stand on the whole 'God' question?"

The Doctor sucked in deeply between clenched teeth. "Oh, you don't want to be asking me that", he said, rising to his feet, "You really don't want to know what I think".

Martin turned quickly his eyes moist and his voice ragged, "Oh, I do" he said simply.

The Doctor looked away and scratched his head as if irritated by something growing deep within his brain. Again he took in air between his teeth and then bit the bottom of his lip as if trying to stop himself from speaking. He finally looked back into Martin's eyes and stared at him for a couple of lengthy seconds. When he spoke his voice was just above a whisper.

"How long have you got?"

Both men smiled at each other and returned to sit down on the wooden bench.

"Realise that you cannot help a soul unless that soul really wants help and is ready to be helped" – Eileen Caddy, 'God Spoke To Me'


	2. Chapter 2

**TWO**

"Everyone and everything around you is your teacher"

-Ken Keyes JR, 'Handbook to Higher Consciousness'

Martin sat down slowly, his eyes focused on the Doctor and his casual, yet confident, manner. Who was he? Why did it feel that asking the Doctor about God was going to open a Pandora's box? And why did he feel he would never be able to close it again once he had seen inside?

The Doctor plonked himself down heavily then leaned forward resting his elbows on his knees. His feet were on tiptoes and his legs were bobbing up and down.

"You know for such a small word 'God' has infinite meanings to infinite people hasn't it?" His mouth drooped down on either side as he turned to face Martin. "So do you want to talk about religion or spirituality?" The Doctor said as if asking him if he'd like one lump or two.

Martin let out a laugh, "Well, I thought they'd be the same thing surely?"

"No, not at all" The Doctor said scrunching his nose up as if smelling something unsavoury. "What gave you that impression? No, you see, religion is what a collective group of people have decided to believe in and then they follow strict guidelines passed down through generations. Spirituality is really more about personal experience and growth and looking within for your own truth". The Doctor's eyebrows rose, "Well… you know…" he added, "Apparently".

He shrugged his shoulders as if embarrassed. He almost looked like he'd been caught saying something he shouldn't have said out loud.

Martin smiled, "Doctor, you're just a hippy aren't you?"

The Doctor's laugh was more of a snort, "Well, it has been said on occasion. No, I'm what's called an 'undecider'… And believe me I've seen many things that could make me sway either way". He looked out across the valley once more. "What religion are you, by the way?"

"I _was _a Roman Catholic" Martin said kicking a small stone gently with his left foot, "I used to go to Sunday school and all that when I was younger. I grew away from it as I got older but I did used to go to an odd service or confession every now and then… whenever I'd been 'bad'", he raised he hands in quote, "And then, of course, I prayed a lot when Nan got ill." His voice lowered to almost a whisper, "Little good that did."

"How old was your Nan?" The Doctor said, his eyebrows in a frown.

"Seventy- four…. And, yeah, I know she had a 'good innings' but she didn't deserve to go like that. She was in so much pain…." Martin leaned back on the bench.

"No, no", The Doctor said suddenly looking thoughtful, "I was just thinking what I was doing when I was seventy four". He stared off vacantly, and then bit the bottom of his lower lip. He shook his head defeated, "Nah, can't remember!"

"Are you playing a game with me, Doctor? Because I'm not really in the mood" Martin stood up to go.

"No, sorry, Martin", The Doctor put his hand on the young man's shoulder and brought him back to the seat slowly. "I say stupid things sometimes just ignore me". He squinted his eyes, "Except, of course, when I'm saying something really important. That's always a good time to listen to me". He tapped the side of his head gently and opened his eyes wide. "I've got the universe in here," he said brightly, "And I'm always willing to talk about it…. and people do say I love the sound of my own voice".

"You do surprise me," Martin said dryly. "So come on, you haven't said, what do you make of the whole 'God' thing?"

"Well," he drew the word out and looked off into the distance, "'God', as some of the religions would have it, is very much about fear, isn't it? I mean sending souls to burn forever in eternal hell fire is a pretty bleak thing for an 'all loving deity' to do, don't you think?" The Doctor nodded to himself and looked deeply into Martin's eyes. "All these different religions declaring 'We have the One True Faith and only ours is the Right One" The Doctor was on his feet now his chest thrust out in a mock, fundamentalist stance, "If you choose the 'wrong' religion 'God' will punish you for all time." He turned to face Martin, his posture relaxed once more and his voice lowered, "Of course there's hundreds of off-shoots of some religions so you can never be quite sure if you're actually even in the 'right' sect even if you're sure you're in the 'right' religion, so your never really know if your on the way to Hell or not…" He breathed in sharply, "But there you go… So, in essence, unfortunately all religion does, most of the time, is create separation. Separation from each other…. a fear of the different. The killing that's gone on in the name of religion over the centuries on this world is beyond appalling…" he searched around as if looking for a word. "It's operant". He almost spat the word out, his face contorted distastefully. He sat down once more pushing his back into the seat. "Yet you lot, you see all this but do nothing. You think religion is sacred and must never be questioned. So you do your best to ignore it's self evident failings. Yet it's killing you." He looked round suddenly puzzled, "What year is this?"

"What year?" Martin said astonished.

"Yeah, what year? It's a simple enough question isn't it?"

Martin signed as he resigned himself to playing along with The Doctor's little game. "It's 2011…. September 2011", his said in his best 'as if you didn't know' voice.

The Doctor winced, he didn't look impressed at all. "Oh, it's a bit of a dodgy one that", he said screwing his face up, breathing in through his teeth. "But, you know, prime example. Muslims.. Christians… Terrorism…. Holy wars…. Jihads … Wars on terror… in fact, great example." There was such energy in his voice now, the subject obviously really fired him up, "How can you lot look at the world right now and not know it's all come about because of what you collectively believe? Your beliefs are destroying you. And the crazy thing is you tell yourselves this is 'God's will! What about humanity's will? What about your will?" The Doctor pointed directly at Martin, his face one of total bewilderment.

Martin looked away from The Doctor as his gaze had become quite manic.

"Well, Doctor, you've made some interesting points," Martin started slowly, his voice was calm and low, "But you've simplified many things. Religion has done such good as well. There are many Christians I know who have done wonderful work for charities and helped many, many people. Same with Muslims. Not everyone believes in 'Holy wars'. In fact, most don't." He used his hands to express himself more fully, "Most religious minded people want only peace and their religion has given them great comfort in taxing times".

He turned to see The Doctor smiling warmly at him. "Good man", The Doctor said his smile had become an almost cheesy grin. "You're defining what you believe and that's good." His face returned to a relaxed smirk, "But I'm not talking about individuals here. They fall under the 'spiritual' banner and we'll come back to them later." He thrust his hands back inside his pockets and stood up once more. "I'm talking about the theology behind religious belief. If you believe you have the one and only Truth and it's your God given duty to make others believe the same thing, you're going to do crazy and desperate things to make that a reality. You will justify killing in the name of God because you believe that's what God wants" He walked casually around the bench kicking tiny bits of gravel up as he moved. "All of your history is based on the fact that God is a god of 'needs' and 'desires' and you've killed your selves over and over again because you disagree about what those 'needs' are. It's madness. You know all this already. All of you do. Yet you all sit back and watch it happen. As long as you've got chips on your table and your TV guide in one hand and your own air of superiority, you don't really seem that bothered".

He suddenly spun himself round in a circle perched on one leg like a crane. Dust flew up from the gravel below his foot. The Doctor lifted his heel and both men stared at the crushed gravel beneath his plimsoll.

"That's what belief in a God of Fear has done for your world," he said through clenched teeth.

Martin stared at The Doctor silently for a few seconds. Who was this guy to speak with such authority? He only looked a couple of years older than Martin and yet his eyes seemed to tell a different story.

"But the essence of God is love, Doctor" Martin said softly and he felt he meant every word. "Where does love come into it?"

The Doctor suddenly stood perfectly still. He looked at the ground once more and his foot found the stone Martin had been playing with earlier. He moved it gently with the tip of his plimsoll.

"Well, that's the question, isn't it?" his voice was measured and smooth. "And you see, that's more in the area of spirituality. That's more about the idea of 'oneness' and how everything in the universe is connected." He said the word 'connected' like it was made out of chocolate.

He then locked his hands together and pushed them out in front of him. He turned his hands palms up and waggled his joined fingers, his smile growing on his face and his eyes wide with intrigue and hidden knowledge. Without looking he fell backwards and landed casually on the bench, the wood creaking beneath his slight frame. He crossed his legs and cupped his still joined hands around the cap of one knee and looked up at Martin expectedly.

"What?" Martin asked, a smile finally appearing on his face.

"Well, you better sit down", The Doctor grinned, "We could be here a while…"

"Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man – living in the sky – who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry for ever and ever 'til the end of time… But He loves you!"

- George Carlin, quote taken from 'The God Delusion by Richard Dawkins


	3. Chapter 3

**THREE**

"Each player must accept the cards life deals for him or her. But once they are in hand, he or she alone must decide how to play the cards in order to win the game" - Voltaire

As soon as Martin lowered himself down onto the seat The Doctor leaped up suddenly.

"Nah, tell you what, let's go for a walk," he said starting to stroll slowly along the gravel path. "It's a lovely day with a nip in the air and a faint smell of lilac on the breeze," he sniffed in softly then pointed ahead, "And there's that lovely little wood next to Mrs McFlurry's cottage". He looked back at Martin for the first time, "We could have a wander in there".

"Mrs McFlurry's cottage?" Martin asked puzzled. "My Nan used to talk about her. She always used to tell me these old wife's tales of how that cottage used to have all sorts of dark things happening around it. People were killed and all sorts…" Martin stared off into the distance remembering the sound of his Nan's voice as she used to tell him stories at night. "Then, apparently, this 'stranger' came along and sorted the whole thing out and then suddenly all the monsters were gone." Martin shook his head at how silly the whole story sounded, clapped his hands together as he stood up and started following The Doctor who had picked up quite a pace. "But that was years ago. She was old when my Nan was young. It hasn't been Mrs McFlurry's house for over sixty years."

The Doctor stopped in his tracks. "Oh yeah" he said as if confused no more. He scratched his ear and played with the back of his neck. He then carried on walking but more slowly this time. Martin caught up with him and they both walked in line. "She made a lovely cup of tea, Mrs McFlurry did" The Doctor said casually, "She always had ice cream too". His voice trailed off softly and his eyes wandered towards the wood. He shook his head and lifted his voice once more "Anyway…" he said brightly, "Where were we?"

"You were about to tell me about 'One-ness' of all life, apparently" Martin said with a grin forming upon his mouth. The Doctor looked at him squarely in the eye. He held his gaze for a second and Martin could almost feel himself being pulled in…

The Doctor looked away suddenly and turned his eyes so he was squinting towards the sun.

"Well, you know, these are just theories, ok?" he began, "I'm not saying this is Truth with a capital T. How could it be? Your head would explode if I told you the Truth!" He raised a clenched fist to the side of his face and then opened it suddenly whooshing the sound of an explosion as he did it.

"Oh, come on, Doctor", Martin said undefeated, "I'm not thick. Tell me."

The Doctor was perfectly still and calm. He picked up a tiny, black pebble and stared at it intently. His voice was low and soothing…

"There is a myth among my own people, among many peoples, that says the universe sprang from one single entity. Some people call this 'The Day of Creation'. Others call it 'The Big Bang'. The Time Lords called it 'The Kinetic Dance'… which was unusually imaginative and poetic for that lot."

Martin wanted to interrupt but just couldn't. 'Time lords?' What was all that about?

The Doctor continued, his voice was calm and smooth. "Others personify this force and give it a names: Enki, Ra, God,… Dave… whatever". His voice was just above a whisper now, "And I suppose the idea is that this 'one thing' couldn't know itself as anything except that 'one thing' so it splintered itself into trillions and zillions of pieces in order to know itself as an experience… A sort of knowable 'something', if you like… And made all the pieces of itself forget that it was actually 'one thing' so that it could experience everything it was not… Namely the hot _and_ the cold, the up _and_ the down… the love _and_ the fear… Life acting out it's own creations unaware of how everyone, and everything, is 'connected'… And that's 'us' right here and right now." He kept staring at the pebble as he bounced it in his hand. "We are the Universe experiencing itself … Because that is what life is… The Universe experiencing itself… through us. So, in a sense, we _are_ God 'God-ing'… and 'God' is just another word for 'life'". He looked up and smiled at Martin. "We're all One thing…" He put his hands in his pockets once more squeezing the stone as he did so. "You know… Apparently", he added almost dismissively.

Martin could feel his head spinning.

"Now, of course," The Doctor continued, "On a molecular level that's true anyway. We're all made from 'star stuff', as Carl Sagan put it…We are all made from tiny little particles that came out of a dead sun…. so I can see where that's coming from." The sides of his mouth drooped down once more. "And, of course, on a spiritual level, all religions have their own idea of a 'One-ness' with God. The Buddha, for example, taught of how all life began with one thought. Muhammad, Paramahansa Yogananda, Baha'Allah…. Many spiritual masters all had very similar messages to convey, and most humans who've had, what some people call, a 'religious experience' always tell of the beautiful, euphoric sense of connection with all of life that the experience gives them."

The Doctor looked over at the Church and turned to walk straight back towards it. It was an old 15th century church built onto the side of a picturesque green hill, it's roof a recent 21st century update but it's walls were beautiful, granite grey. Martin and The Doctor approached the side of the church in silence. Martin didn't really know what to say. This was all moving so fast for him.

The Doctor looked deeply into a stained glass window. Among the tirade of colours was a depiction of Christ on the cross, his side pierced and his head bloodied with a crown of thorns. The Doctor looked deeply into the eyes of the figure.

"I mean Jesus said 'I and the Father are One' so maybe he was onto something too" he nodded up at the window but then winced at the scene depicted as if only just really seeing it for the first time. "And look where he ended up".

"But Jesus died for us, Doctor" Martin began before stopping himself. He thought he had put his 'faith' behind him.

The Doctor looked round at him, "Are your old Sunday School teachings kicking in, Marty? I'd get that seen to if I were you." The Doctor nodded condescendingly.

"But it _all_ can't be for nothing!" Martin protested his voice was raised for the first time as he stood pointing towards the window. "He can't have gone through all that for nothing! He had a message!" Martin surprised himself at his out burst. Did he really believe that?

"And what was his message Marty, huh? You tell me" The Doctor stood almost looking down on him as if demanding of Martin the answer he did not yet have himself.

Martin sat down on the grass heavily. He let out a long sigh and looked up at the Doctor. How could he sum up what he believed Jesus' message was? What had he actually learnt in those Sunday schools?

What would his Nan say right now?

"It was love, Doctor" he said gently, "He said to love one another".

The Doctor starred at him once more. Martin looked deeply into The Doctor's brown eyes. He kept his gaze firm and The Doctor did the same. Again Martin felt himself been drawn towards The Doctor. It was as if he was literally falling into his eyes…

The Doctor suddenly sniffed and turned to look once more at the window.

"Well, yeah," The Doctor began, "But he also talked about Hell and Judgement and the end of the world… I mean, it's not all love and light is it? The Bible, that is…". He sucked in air between his teeth "Of course, there's no way of telling if Jesus actually said those things. Maybe he was just a lovely, spiritual bloke who's had his teachings perverted by other human's agendas. . Maybe people have added to his story and taken away from it… The Council Of Nicaea … Mystery schools… Hidden knowledge… The Di Vinci Code…" The Doctor breathed in sharply "Oh, it's a mine field, Marty. 'To love each other'? Yeah, that's great but what does that mean? What about pain? Suffering? Tyranny? How do you love someone who's coming at you with an axe?" The Doctor shook his head, his eyes skyward. "It's not all love and light," he repeated. He looked around at Martin once more and saw that the man was sobbing gently, "But, you know, most of the time it can be… if you want it to be" The Doctor added softly, he knew he might have over stepped the mark a bit. He knelt down beside Martin balancing on his tiptoes with his hands interlocked above his knees. "I'm sorry, Martin, but you did ask" he said, his voice was low and measured.

"Oh, it's not that, Doctor" Martin said wiping away his few tears, "it's just…. Bloody hell… everything. I've buried my Nan today and now I'm having my … _her_ faith dissected before my eyes." He stood up sharply. The Doctor began to speak but Martin silenced him with his hands. "It's ok, Doctor, I know you don't mean to be disrespectful but I'm sure if my Nan was here she would argue you into the ground with all that you are saying." He brushed grass from his coat and patted down his trousers. "I'm sure if Jesus was alive today he'd have lots to say about how the Church has handled his message since his death but, as he isn't, we'll just have to pretend we know what he meant!". He breathed in deeply and let out almost a nervous laugh. He looked at the Doctor who stood perfectly calm in front of him.

When the Doctor spoke his voice was confident and measured.

"Do you want to go and ask him what he meant?"

Martin was taken aback "What, like, pray or something?"

"No, I mean go meet Jesus… in the flesh… right now… me and you"

The Doctor's face was straight and expressionless.

Martin laughed again as he started to rise to his feet "And how do we do that?" He asked sarcastically.

The Doctor just smiled.

"Like attracts like.

Whatever the conscious mind thinks and believes

The subconscious identically creates"

- Brian Adams, 'How to Succeed'


	4. Chapter 4

**FOUR**

"Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it.

Boldness has genius, magic and power in it.

Begin it now"- Goethe

"C'mon then" The Doctor was already walking away from the church along the grey, pebbled footpath, "There's no time like the present".

"Where are we going?" Martin asked completely baffled as to what was really going on. He ran to catch up to The Doctor who was already nearing the Churchyard gate.

"I'm a time traveller and I've got a time machine", The Doctor said matter of factly walking briskly through the little archway.

Martin sniggered slightly. "A Time Traveller?"

"Yep"

"And you've got a time machine?"

"Yep"

"A time traveller with a time machine?"

"Wow, you catch on quick" The Doctor's eyebrows were raised.

"You're a time traveller and you've got a time machine?" Martin repeated once more.

"Blimey, is there an echo in here?" The Doctor added sarcastically. "You want to get your ears seen to, Marty. I think you may have some sort of blockage."

"And you're expecting me to believe this _because_….?" Martin asked. He could be sarcastic too.

"What the blockage or the time machine?" The Doctor seemed genuinely puzzled. "Well, I'm expecting you to believe it when you've seen it. Until then, you can believe what you like. It doesn't make it less true." The side of The Doctor's mouth dropped down once more.

"So where is it then?" Martin was willing to play along a little while longer. The Doctor's confidence was so disarming and yet there was something about him that was completely compelling.

"It's in the woods. I always park it there." The Doctor strode purposely towards the tiny wood that stood by the side of Mrs McFlurry's cottage. As he passed the little thatched dwelling The Doctor suddenly stopped and stared up intently at one of the bedroom windows. He breathed in sharply through his teeth. "Oww… I remember been thrown out of _that _window." He said nodding upward. "It was a good job that gerbil broke my fall." He added quietly. He moved back into his stride as if nothing had been said at all.

Martin just wasn't going to ask. He just wanted to see this 'Time Machine'. He was interested to see at what point The Doctor's little game was going to stop and his whole pretence would come crashing down around his smug little ears.

As they entered the wood Martin could see a large, dark object slightly hidden underneath the braches of a blossoming willow tree. The Doctor glided up the object and Martin could see it was a large blue box. As he got closer to it he found it looked like an old metropolitan police box that he had once seen on Scarborough sea front.

A police box in a wood?

The Doctor was already unlocking the door. "C'mon then" he said looking around at Martin casually. "Let's go and see what's true."

Martin let out a nervous laugh. "Is that it then?" he said as The Doctor disappeared inside. "That's your time machine is it? A little shed?" Martin was enjoying been the sarcastic one now. He moved cautiously towards the door but stopped right outside it. "Have you got little flowers in there as your 'space' controls and little pot plants you use as ear phones?" He was starting to enjoy this now, "Have you got little…."

The Doctor's hands suddenly flew out of the door, grabbed Martin by the lapels on his jacket and dragged him inside. Martin tripped on the ridge of the door way and fell forwarded heavily. The Doctor caught him from falling onto his knees.

Martin was not at all impressed by being dragged in so violently and his mind flashed with a thousand thoughts of just what was happening. Was The Doctor a murderer? Had he come here to slice Martin into tiny little bits of meat inside his little blue box? Why had he gone into this wood with this complete stranger in the first place anyway?

Once the shock of being man handled so abruptly wore off Martin realised that he was in a large room. His legs gave way slightly as he looked around at the sight his eyes were seeing but his mind was trying to deny.

He was in a huge, dome shaped room that had large, narrow girder-like structures going from floor to ceiling. At the centre of the room was what looked like some sort of control area. It was connected to the roof via a long tube and thick cables ran from the ground to the roof. The panels from the central column shone a rich, green colour and the rest of the room took on an almost sand like glow. The air smelt slightly of strawberries mixed with a faint whiff of engine grease and the temperature was a comfortable warm.

Martin found a chair to his right so he sat down in it heavily. His mouth was open but no sound could come out. He spluttered out a few noises but nothing that could be described as words.

"That's alright, Marty, don't worry about it." The Doctor was marching towards an open door at the back of the room. "It's just culture shock. Welcome to my world… This is called my TARDIS and… Well… It's good here" He grinned an impossibly large grin and then strode purposefully from the room and shouted back at Martin, his voice as light and breezy as always. "Make yourself at home. I just want to get a few books".

'Make myself at home?' Martin thought. What _is _happening? What is this place? How can all this be inside that little blue box?

The Doctor suddenly bounced back into the room. He had an armful of books which he plonked down on a leather chair that was attached to rails that ran around the centre of the room. He picked up the top one first and held it proudly in both hands. He smiled at it passionately and spun it around to Martin so he could see the cover.

"The Big Bumper Book of Bible Stories' by Penguin books. 1974 edition" The Doctor said affectionately. "Oh, I love this book. Bob Geldof gave me that." He nodded once at the book. "There's good stories in there and the illustrations are _amazing_" His face was beaming with happiness. "Me and Bob had a right night reading that. Laugh? Laugh? He's not always moody, you know".

"What are the books for?" Martin's voice was little more than a croak.

"Reference, Froggy" The Doctor started flicking through the book. "We need to know where we are going." He suddenly stopped on a page. "Oh wait on, wait on," he said excitedly, "If we're really going to do this can we just…" He spun the book around to face Martin once more. "Let's go and see what all this was about." He pointed over the top of the book at the colourful drawings.

Martin looked at the page. The children's illustration depicted Moses bringing the Ten Commandments to the Israelites. He stood on the footsteps of a large mountain and dark clouds and stormy weather dominated the skyline. Martin remembered the story well from his Sunday school days. It was a story of a man's face-to-face encounter with his God. Like most Old Testament stories, it always used to frighten Martin slightly.

"Let's go and see what was really above Mount Sinai all those years ago" The Doctor's voice was raised. "Let's go and find out where this whole 'God' thing began." He started pressing buttons purposefully on a small computer that was linked to one of the control panels. "You know," he said thoughtfully and quietly, "I can't understand why I've never done this before". He looked sideways at Martin as if expecting a reaction. When it never came he shook his head and carried on typing. "We can get to Jesus later. He's probably busy right now anyway. Let's go and find out who these God's really were."

"Gods?" asked Martin. "I thought we were talking of _The _God? You know, the main man? The One and only?"

The Doctor scrunched his nose up and looked over at Martin. "Nah, we're talking about the beings that _appeared_ to be gods to your primitive fore fathers. It's not just the Bible, you know. 'Gods that came down from the sky' are a constant occurrence in hundreds of Mankind's mythologies and religions. Enlil, Ishkur, Ra, Marduk…. Oh, I could go on all day". He picked up another book from the pile. It was 'Gods of the New Millennium' by Alan F Alford. "The trouble is, you lot, you just write off those mythologies as just that… Myths. Your 'experts' put it down to the over fertile nature of the primitive mind…..Which is rich coming from that lot", he snorted. "But most of you don't really think about it, you just get on with your day to day lives, eating your chips and watching your telly." He took off his long jacket and threw it over a side rail. "Yet these are the events that have shaped mankind's evolutional destiny. It's made the world into the state its in …. In this time right now…. both good _and _bad". He threw the book casually in the air and caught it in his right hand without even looking in its direction. "It's not kid's stuff this… It isn't like Jackanory you know. None of you have any idea how true those stories were. They were physical events that happened and, so strong was their impact on mankind, that half of your world today still worship one of the many gods of pre-history… They just call him by a different name. Yahweh, Allah, Jehovah… The same God just a different name" He came up close to Martin and put the book in his hands.

Martin flicked through the pictures on the glossy pages of the incredibly thick book. From cave drawings to pictures of the massive buildings mankind made in honour of their 'gods', Martin had seen stuff like this before but never really thought about it on a deeper level… Or at least, he didn't _think_ that he had. He knew that this was all about to change. A rush of fear and excitement welled through him. He choked back a cry and composed himself as best he could.

"So what do you think they were, Doctor?" He asked quietly. Did he really want to know?

"Well, what do you think, Marty? 'God's that came down from the sky'? C'mon, it's not rocket science is it?" The Doctor flipped a switch on the control panel and the central column began to rise up and down and the whole room seemed to wheeze painfully. Martin looked anxiously at The Doctor. "Don't worry" The Doctor said with a smirk, "It's meant to do that."

Martin returned to the question. "Are you saying that aliens were the cause of all of mankind's religions, Doctor?"

"Am I?" The Doctor mused thoughtfully, "Yeah, I suppose I am. To a certain extent."

Martin let out a half laugh that was more like a short breath. "But that's just…. Silly" he said softly. He just couldn't think of anything else to say.

"Oh, Martin" The Doctor laughed, "I'm going to blow your mind."

Outside the blue box a young rabbit grazed cautiously around the rim of the Doctor's time ship. It was startled suddenly by a sound coming from within and yet around the vessel. It ran quickly away and took refuge behind a large tree stub that was thick with shrubbery. With it's nose twitching and back leg tapping it watched as the time machine faded from view leaving behind it crushed grass in the shape of a large, dark square.

"Life is either a daring adventure… or nothing" – Helen Keller


	5. Chapter 5

**FIVE**

"Any sufficiently advanced technology is in-distinguishable from magic'

Arthur C Clarke

"Aliens?"

Martin was still in his seat. He hadn't dare moved, if he was honest. The whole room was literally shaking slightly and the noises coming from the 'control area' wheezed and groaned ominously.

"Do you mean to tell me that 'God' was an alien?" This was all starting to get a bit too much for Martin.

"Well," The Doctor began, "It depends what you are calling 'God'. If you're calling 'God' the universe itself and the 'one' entity I was talking about earlier… then no." He returned to stare at his computer. "Where as if you are saying that 'God' is the being that Moses met on that mountain… then yes… that is exactly what I mean".

Martin was too stunned for words. He'd just never thought in these terms before. Or, at least, he didn't _think _he had…

After a couple of seconds he spoke again. His croak was worse, "So are you also saying that 'aliens' created mankind itself?"

The Doctor threw his head back and craned around to look at Martin, "Ah well," he said, "You see that's a bit more of a 'yes' and a 'no', I'm afraid. It's…." he looked around in the air for the word, "… Complicated."

"Yeah, it would be" Martin laughed and felt himself ease slightly. He hadn't realised but he had been gripping the chair really quite tightly.

And then a thought struck him.

"Are _you_ an alien?"

The Doctor looked down through his nose at his computer, "Errr…" He looked around at Martin suddenly, "… Yeah." He shrugged his shoulders almost apologetically.

Martin sank back further in his chair shaking his head as if his brain was refusing to accept the information.

"Oh come on Marty, where's your sense of wonder?" The Doctor strode towards him, his hands back in his pockets. "Do you know how big the universe is? Do You? Imagine 'massive' times it by 'infinity' and multiply is by 'colossus' and you'd still not have any idea just how brain splatteringly gigantic it is!" He opened his arms out wide and spread his fingers out as far as they'd go "Its huuuggggggggggge!" His eyes were wide and bulbous, his lips sucked together in a 'kiss me quick' pose. "Your world… your solar system… is but a drop in a gigantic ocean. There are countless worlds out they're full of life and there always has been and always will be." He sucked in his breath through his teeth sharply. "Well… you know… that is until all of time and space fall back in on themselves and the whole thing implodes into…" He stopped suddenly and looked at Martin's confused and worried face, "But we don't have to worry about that right now, do we?" He relaxed in to a comfortable stance and carried on. "But life on other planets? Yeah, of course." He spun on his heal and began walking around the console area of the ship, flipping switches as he did so. "Wouldn't it be a waste of space if all there was in the universe was you lot? Do some of mankind still think the universe revolves around them and them alone? How typically human! I mean, how more egotistical can you get?"

Martin's face was a complete blank.

"There are billions of habited planets out there…. Trillions… Quadrillions. Some of them evolve to the point where the inhabitants can leave their own worlds and travel to the stars. Other worlds don't reach that point as they simply destroy themselves in primitive and petty wars before they get that far". He turned back to the control panel, rotated a dial and then looked up at Martin. "Sound familiar?" He asked eyebrows raised.

Martin remained silent.

"Now some of these older more advanced races travelled the stars years ago. They came here… to your world. They were worshipped as Gods because that is what they appeared to be. And, to be fair, they did bring with them much knowledge and brought a certain degree of order to a chaotic world. They were also teachers, many of them. Some spoke of metaphysical truths and introduced their own take on morality and discipline. They became lords of their own kingdom and made disciples of the entire nations" He nodded to himself as if pleased with his summing up. He had tried not to use too many big words…

He looked around at his little screen. "Ah.. Here we go" He looked pleased. "It's 1430BC. We're 112 kilometres left of Egypt, somewhere between what the locals call Paran and Midian in an area known as the Sinai wilderness…" He tapped away at his keyboard taking in the information on the screen. "And the TARDIS seems to be locking on to a load of particle emissions coming from some sort of fusion reactors… which shouldn't really exist in this time period" He put a finger to his nose and tapped it gently "I wonder who that could be?" He suddenly ran around to the other side of the console and turned a huge lever. "Right, we're coming in to land!" He grabbed hold of the console with both hands. "Hold on tight, Marty! This one could be rough!" he shouted through clenched teeth.

Martin panicked and gripped his chair even tighter. He prepared himself for some sort of crash. He closed his eyes tightly and clenched his teeth together.

Beneath his feet he felt a tiny jolt, like an elevator casually arriving at its destination. He kept his eyes closed expecting a more serious shudder at any moment. When it didn't come and the room seemed to quieten down Martin opened one eye slowly and saw The Doctor stood right in front of him grinning inanely.

"You should have seen the look on your face" he beamed. His jacket was back on, yet his hands were still refusing to leave their pockets.

"I thought we were going to crash?" Martin said gingerly.

"No, sorry, it was just me having a bit of fun. I don't do bumpy landings any more. It's been great since I changed the dilethium coil last week," he said brightly, "Or was it last year?" He shook his head and strode towards the door. "My bumpy landing days are well gone" He said proudly as if that explained every thing. "C'mon then, Marty" he said as his hand reached the door handle. "Just be careful out here."

"What do you mean?" Martin asked worryingly

"I mean don't get sand in your eyes." The Doctor responded with a smile. He pulled at the door handle and light streamed in. The Doctor raised a hand to his eyes and moved outside.

As best he could from his position on the chair near the middle of the room Martin craned his neck to look through the doorway. He could see sand and sky. Really blue sky. And really blowing sand. The last time he had looked out of those doors there was a lush, green wood outside them. That was all gone.

Now they were somewhere completely different.

His stomach turned as he realised that all of this was true. The blue box _had _moved. Which meant that all that The Doctor was saying was true also. They _had_ travelled in time and outside those blue doors was Mount Sinai and, in all probability, Moses was there with his people.

Which also meant that, if The Doctor had timed this all right, then 'God' would be there too.

Martin staggered towards the door. He gripped both sides of the frame as he stepped through. He held his breath as he took in the impossible truth before his eyes.

He was on the top of a large, sand covered hill. Mountains stretched out as far as he could see and the sun shone dramatically through the tiny dust clouds that were scattered in the sky. The air was blowing thick and humid yet smelled fresh and musky. No birds flew in the sky at all and the sound of thunder rumbled very close by.

In fact, it sounded like it was coming from behind him

"You might want to come around here, Marty." The Doctor's voice was more of a shout and came from behind the time ship.

Martin kept his hands on the outside of the TARDIS as he followed its edges round to where The Doctor's voice had come from.

The view that he saw made him fall to his knees.

About a mile or maybe even two miles in front of him was a huge mountain. In the vast sky above it was a huge black and grey cloud that seemed filled with fire and flashes of lightning. Yet inside the dark cloud Martin could also see what looked like metal… metal and lights.

They were the edges of some huge, curved craft that hung suspended above the mount.

The terrifying mass must have been at least two kilometres across and was almost like a mountain itself suspended in the air. Water vapour dripped from the sides of the ship and the whole craft was rotating slowly as the dark clouds bellowed and followed loyally behind.

Martin could feel every hair on his body stand to attention as the air around him was charged with static. He gasped heavily as he looked downwards and realised that thousands of people were by the foot of the mountain and in the valley below him.

It was the Israelites; they were Moses' people. He focused in on them and realised he could hear their wails and cries even from where he was standing. He could see masses of hands pointing skywards as cries of 'Fear God' rang out frantically and chaotically. Children were crying uncontrollably as Mothers clutched them to their breasts in the vain hope that it would comfort them. They were clearly terrified.

And why wouldn't they be? Their God's 'heavenly chariot' was there right in front of them… right in front of Martin. It was undeniably and physically there before their very eyes.

To Martin the scale of the scene was majestic and terrifying all at once.

Suddenly he jumped and shook with fear as a loud, deep klaxon like noise cut through the air and the whole ground vibrated to it's sound.

"That's the 'trumpet blast' of the Angels" The Doctor shouted above the wind.

Martin turned to look at The Doctor. His coat was flapping so much he was holding it tight to his sides. His face was serious and dark with shadow and his eyes were looking straight at Martin.

He looked sad, Martin thought, but not at all surprised.

The Doctor returned to look skyward and nodded up to the metallic craft "And that there is the Mother Ship of Yahweh: The mighty God of Israel."

Martin looked back at the giant spacecraft one more time. Flames shot out of the side of the ship and clouds of black smoke bellowed close behind them. This was what was meant by fire and brimstone, Martin realised. This majestic show of power was literally the fear of God made manifest.

Martin's whole body shook from head to toe. The knot in his stomach tightened to the point where he thought it might explode.

And then slowly, and uncontrollably, he lowered his head to the sand and sobbed with all his heart.

"On the morning of the third day there was thunder and lightning, with a thick cloud over the mountain, and a very loud trumpet blast… Mount Sanai was covered with smoke, because the Lord descended on it in fire.

And the glory of the Lord settled on Mount Sinai. For six days the cloud covered the mountain… To the Israelites the glory of the Lord looked like a consuming fire on top of the mountain."

- Exodus 19:16 –24:17, The Bible


	6. Chapter 6

**SIX**

"When your children ask you 'What does this ritual mean?' you will answer,

'It is the sacrifice of the 'pass-over' to honour the Lord (Yahweh/Jehovah),

because he has passed over the houses of the Israelites in Egypt.

He killed the Egyptians, but spared us'.

At midnight the Lord (Yahweh/Jehovah) killed all the first born sons in Egypt…"

-The Book of Exodus 12:26, The Bible

"Martin? Are you alright?" The Doctor was knelt on tiptoes beside Martin. He had his hand on the man's back and he patted it gently.

"Do I look alright?" Martin gasped looking round. "Do I look 'all right' to you, Doctor?" He eyes were full of tears and his face full of pain and devastation.

"You bring me here to see this? To see this… soul destroying truth and you want me to be 'all right'?" He stayed on his knees and looked at The Doctor with pleading eyes. "Why… WHY did you bring me here?"

The Doctor scrunched up his nose and shrugged. "I just thought you wanted to know." He stood up casually, "I mean, you asked me remember? You asked me where I stood on the whole 'God' question." He nodded towards the mountain, "Well, this is where we're standing and this is what we are seeing. You wanted to know the Truth and, to an extent, that's what I'm giving you. It's not my fault if it doesn't go hand in hand with what you previously _thought_ you knew." He bent his knees and patted Martin gently on the top of his head, "But don't worry", he said brightly, "Just because aliens visited your world years ago doesn't mean all of spirituality is a lie… It doesn't mean the soul doesn't exist… It doesn't mean there's no 'life after death'… It just means there's much more to 'God' than a visitation like this from a 'jealous' deity".

He stepped forward a few paces and picked up a sharp stone. He pointed the edge of it towards the Mother ship in an almost casual manner, spinning the tip around in small, delicate circles.

"So this is Yahweh… or Jehovah, as he's sometimes called… A God of order and discipline mixed in with a load of good old wrath and vengeance… A bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser and a deity that demanded it's worship above all other gods… A tyrannical monarch who would kill you so much as look at you if you made even the slightest error. Just ask the inhabitants of Sodom and Gomorrah whom he had destroyed in one of your planets first nuclear blasts. And of course, just recently, he's had all the Egyptian first-born children murdered and then got all his followers to celebrate it with what is termed 'passover'! And they're still doing it in your time"

Martin rose to his feet and staggered towards The Doctor. "You seem to know a lot about this, Doctor. I thought you were on this journey of discovery with me? I thought you said you just wanted to see what really happened here?"

The Doctor looked round at Martin. "Well, yeah, I did but I just wanted to see it again." He shrugged, "Nah, I've been here before. It was one of the first times and places I came to on your planet". He looked suddenly just above Martin's left shoulder. "In fact, there I am" he said, his eyes nodding.

Martin turned to where The Doctor was indicating. About 800 yards away on another hill Martin could see a blue police box just like The Doctor's. Stood a few steps away from it there was an old, white haired man in what looked like Edwardian clothes. He seemed to be holding some sort of camera and was clicking away clearly fascinated by what he was seeing above the mountain.

"He doesn't much look like you" Martin said perplexed.

"No, well I've changed a bit since then." The Doctor said sheepishly, "In fact, I've changed nine times since then…" He looked at Martin's confused face, "But don't let that worry you." He put his arm around Martin's shoulder then, with his other hand, put his thumb and a finger in his mouth. He whistled loudly over at the old man.

The grey haired gentleman looked round and seem to recognise The Doctor immediately but, instead of waving back, he shook his head almost disapprovingly. He cupped a hand to his mouth, "And what are you doing here, young man, mmm? You know that only one of us is meant to be here at any one time!" he shouted.

The Doctor 'funnelled' his mouth too, "Oh don't call me 'young man', you old buffer, I'm older than you!" He gripped Martin more tightly around the shoulder, "Now take our picture or I'm telling your missus you're here!" He beamed a big grin as the old man raised the camera and reluctantly took a couple of shots. The Doctor then gave the old man a wave of thanks and let go of Martin's shoulder.

The Elderly gentlemen shook his head once more then turned and walked back inside his time machine. A couple of seconds later the light on the top of the blue box began flashing and, with a harsh, wind like noise, the machine began to slowly fade from view.

Martin looked back at The Doctor who was grinning at him smugly. "Lovely bloke that", The Doctor said warmly, "He's got a bit of a temper though. Luckily I've mellowed since"

Martin said nothing. What could he say? What could surprise him now?

Both men turned once more to the sight above the mountain. The colossus bulk suspended above it had seemed to have slowed its rotation slightly and the screams coming from the valley below seemed to have eased slightly also.

"Yahweh's ship has just arrived" The Doctor explained, "That's why you've been seeing so much panic from these poor people" He nodded down at the Israelites in the valley. "The Mother ship will be here for six days and then depart, leaving Yahweh at the top of the mountain where Moses will go up to meet him… Meet 'God'… Get given the Ten Commandments… Come back down again…. Find a few Israelites worshipping 'false' idols… Have nearly three thousand of them killed… And then stay in touch with 'God' via a telecommunications device known as the 'Ark of the Covenant'" The Doctor lowered the sides of his lips. "Quite straightforward really" he said as if nothing more needed to be explained.

"Well, can't we warn them?" Martin asked anxiously as he looked at the human beings in the valley below.

"What?" The Doctor's laugh was more of a snort, "What are you going to say to them? 'Don't take any notice of that nasty space man he's not really God'?" The Doctor put both his hands on Martin's shoulders and spun him around to face him. "It _is _their God, Martin! That's the whole point! You'll be killed before you finish your first sentence. You haven't seen religious zealousness like this I can tell you!"

Suddenly the ground shook as the deep, 'trumpet blast of the angels' rang out once more through out the valley.

Martin shook violently as his heart raced considerably and the knot in his stomach returned to haunt him.

"Oh-oh" The Doctor sounded alarmed for the first time. "I really don't think we should stay any longer, Marty. It's time to go."

"Why?" Martin felt his hands tremble.

"I think we've been noticed" The Doctor's voice sounded genuinely concerned as he was looking up at the Mother ship.

Martin followed his gaze. He squinted his eyes as he focused in on the side of the ship.

Four small objects had left the vessel and were moving outwards in flying formation. They flew upwards in an arrow like shape creating vapour trails as they did so and then suddenly swooped downwards above the heads of the Israelites. Martin could hear screams and wails as chaos broke out in the camp below.

"Angels!" The Doctor shouted. "And I don't mean the big, white fluffy kind either! Martin we have to go! Now!"

Martin was terrified but found he couldn't move. He was literally paralysed with fear.

"I can't move, Doctor" He whispered "Doctor! I can't move!" He raised his voice through clenched teeth.

He could see the Angels getting nearer.

He could _feel_ them getting nearer.

They were still about half a mile away but Martin could see that they looked metallic as flashes of bronze and gold reflected off them in the harsh sun. It made them shine with radiance and power. He could also make out their huge wings, which were almost interlocked with each other and which seemed to make them spin as they flew. All four creatures grew larger and larger within Martin's eyes as their terrifying mass got closer and closer.

"Doctor I can't move!" Martin was screaming now. His heart felt like it was about to explode and his stomach was twisting with pain.

"Yes you can!" The Doctor shouted commandingly. "Yes you can… just do it! DO IT!"

The Doctor was stood by his TARDIS almost holding on to the sides of it as the wind increased in ferocity. The noise of the air alone bellowed deeply but the angels were making their own unique sound: a deep, juddering scream as if the air before them was literally been ripped apart as they moved swiftly towards where Martin and The Doctor were stood.

"Move, Martin!" The Doctor shouted through teeth clenched tight. "If you don't move now I am leaving you here! For them! NOW MOVE!"

Yet all Martin could hear was the Angel's screaming getting louder and louder.

All he could see were their giant wings covered in turning, hypnotic eyes.

And all he could feel was overwhelming fear…

"At the centre of the storm, I saw what looked like four living creatures in human form, but each of them had four faces and four wings…. They shone like polished bronze… Each creature faced all four directions, so the group could go wherever they wished, without having to turn… As I was looking at the four creatures, I saw four wheels touching the ground, one beside each of them… The rims of the wheels were covered in eyes… I heard the noise their wings made in flight: it sounded like the roar of the sea, like the noise of a huge army, like the voice of the Almighty God"

Extracts from The Book of EZEKIEL 4: 5 – 22:24


	7. Chapter 7

**SEVEN**

"The Lord (Yahweh/Jehovah) said "Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by". Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper."

- Kings 1, 19:11 – The Bible

"Move!"

Martin finally heard The Doctor's voice and managed to kick his legs outwards and scramble to his feet. But the loose pebbles and stones beneath his shoes weren't helping him get his grip and Martin had to use his hands to steady himself as he frantically made his way back towards where the TARDIS was stood.

The terrifying, juddering scream of the Angels filled Martin's head as the wind around him became so intense it almost felt like it was picking him up and pushing him back into the Angel's grip.

As Martin reached out to grab hold of the blue panelled wood on the rear of the time ship, he turned his head once more to see how close the Angels were.

They were nearly upon him… and flying now as one unit. The tips of their metallic wings were joined to each other so they created a perfect, hollow square as they flew. Their 'bodies' faced outwards so every direction was covered and Martin could see their faces… their 'eyes'… looking straight down at him.

Suddenly Martin felt himself been pulled by the collar of his coat. It was The Doctor dragging him around to the other side of the TARDIS in a last ditch attempt to escape the Angels' gaze. Martin found himself on the ground in front of the TARDIS' doors. His ears and head were full of the deep scream of the four creatures and his eyes were streaming with tears from the tiny grains of sand that were being blown up all around him. He looked up to see The Doctor frantically trying to put his tiny 'Yale' key into the TARDIS' antiquated door lock.

Suddenly the Angels were upon them.

With a huge whooshing roar all four creatures swung into view and disengaged their wings from each other to become separated once more. They hovered majestically in a perfect line about forty feet away from the TARDIS, blowing sand in all directions creating their own private storm.

Martin scrambled to his feet as he took in the terrifying scene. He could see that the Angels were made of some sort of polished, bronze like metal. Each of their huge wings must have been at least thirty foot across and were full of turning, silver spheres. The Angels almost looked like giant, metallic butterflies with a human like occupant inside the 'body' of each machine, their faces behind a helmet like dome.

Martin stared intently at one of the Angels… or, more precisely, the living creature within it. The humanoid's eyes were a deep, penetrating blue and would be beautiful, Martin thought, if they were not so terrifying. He seemed to be a male and impossibly good looking with a strong jaw and well-defined features. Like a Greek god, Martin thought.

"You are,,, in the presence,,, of the,,, Mighty Lord,,, Yahweh,,, State your names,,, and your intentions,,,"

The Angel on the far left shouted with a loud, booming obviously amplified voice. It echoed around the valley with power and menace. The Angel carried what looked like some sort of staff and it was pointing it directly at The Doctor and Martin.

Martin shook with fear as he looked around at The Doctor who had stopped playing with the door lock and was now staring intently at the Angels too.

"Yeah, yeah, forget all the spiel …could you turn it all down a bit, please?" The Doctor shouted back, "It's a bit hard to hear with all your screaming and your whooshing and all your 'oh look at me with my big flying suit on' theatrics!" He even did the moves, flapping his hands out by his sides.

Martin could literally see the humanoid's eyes narrow. It's staff suddenly shimmered and spheres began detaching themselves from the creature's wings. The turning, silver globes flew towards Martin and the Doctor and swiftly surrounded the pair. They hovered a few feet above the men's heads and then, with a high tearing noise, suddenly seemed to suck all the air and sound away in one god-like breath…

Silence

The Doctor and Martin were cocooned in perfect silence.

The Angels remained hovering where they were and Martin could see the occupant's lips moving. They were either talking to each other or communicating with the Mother ship…. Maybe even talking to 'God' himself.

Martin turned to The Doctor and tried to speak. But no sound came out even though he could feel his throat was working.

Was he deaf? Had the Angels 'smitted' him? He could feel the ground beneath his feet but that's all he could feel. Well, that was apart from his heart beating so hard he could feel it in his mouth.

The Doctor looked at him directly in his eyes. For the first time since he had met The Doctor he could see fear reflected back. Sweat dripped from The Doctor's forehead, his head shook and his lips were moving as if in conversation.

But Martin could hear nothing.

Inside the eerie silence he suddenly heard a gentle voice as if someone was literally whispering in his ear:

"Who Are You?"

Startled Martin pressed his back hard against the TARDIS door.

Suddenly he found himself falling backwards… Falling into the TARDIS. The air and sound returned abruptly as Martin hit the floor with a loud thump and looked up to see The Doctor slamming the TARDIS door behind them.

"Yeah!" The Doctor shouted excitedly, "Well done, Marty! All it needed was a little push and we were in!" He ran over to the control area in the middle of his ship and began flicking switches and turning dials. "The TARDIS will protect us now!" He shouted confidently.

Bang.

A massive shock suddenly shook the whole room and Martin found himself knocked back down to the floor. The Doctor managed to remain standing but gripped the side of the console tightly.

"Whoah… They're not going to let us go without a fight!" The Doctor shouted. He grinned at Martin unexpectedly. Was he actually enjoying this?

"**Surrender now,,, There is nowhere for you to go,,,"**

The Angel's voice boomed commandingly from outside the ship.

"**You are,,, the subjects,,, of the Lord,,, Yahweh,,, And therefore,,, in His command,,, Surrender now,,, or be destroyed where you stand,,,"**

The Doctor's face fell once more. "Hold on tight, Marty!" He shouted, his teeth were clenched tight. He threw a switch and the column at the centre of the ship began to rise and fall slowly. With the deep, wind like sound that Martin had heard on his previous 'trip', the shaking of the room slowly faded and relief began to dawn across The Doctor's face. The two men looked at each other in anticipated silence for a few seconds. They both held on where they hands had been gripping as both seemed to be waiting for another violent shock to attack the TARDIS.

After a few seconds of calm both men smiled at each other with relief.

"Ah ha!" The Doctor was delighted, "Easy!" He laughed heartily, clapped his hands together and moved swiftly towards where Martin was. He extended his hand and helped Martin back to his feet. "Good one, Marty" He patted down the sides of Martin's jacket as sand and dust bellowed out and onto the TARDIS floor. "Getting us back in the TARDIS was a brilliant plan!" He beamed his big grin and hugged Martin tightly. "Brilliant!" He repeated.

"I just lent on the door, Doctor" Martin stated quietly as a simple matter of fact. He shivered to himself as he felt his spine start to relax for the first time in what seemed like an eternity. He laughed nervously as he ran a hand through his hair. "I've never been so terrified in my life", his voice was faint and broken and his hands shook uncontrollably.

"Haven't you?" The Doctor sounded genuinely surprised "Oh, you haven't lived!" He swung around, put his hands in his pockets and threw his head back as he marched back over to the central console. "You know, I've had a few scares in my time that makes _that _look like a walk in the park". He looked back at Martin, "But, you know, that was pretty close, I'll give you that" He smiled and grinned at him once more. "Now, what you need is a good cup of tea" he said, rubbing his hands together. "In fact, I could do with a cup myself". He clacked his mouth together and scrunched up his face. "It must be all of that sand… I'm parched!" He turned to face the console once more. He pressed a sequence of buttons and then looked around at Martin with a wide grin and gave him a sly wink. "There… That's the kettle on then", he said casually.

Martin moved slowly over to where The Doctor was standing. He stared blankly at the lights within the rising central column and tilted his head to one side. The lights inside the console flashed in Martin's eyes. Brilliant clear blues mingled with perfect whites as the energy forms danced inside their glass casing.

Martin thought back to the perfect silence he'd experience just moments before.

"That voice…" he said quietly, "Did you hear that voice?"

The Doctor was silent as he tapped away at his instruments. His eyes remained down at the controls.

"Yeah," he eventually whispered. He nodded his head gently in the affirmative. "That was Yahweh…"

He turned to look at Martin. His eyes were full of sadness and pain.

Martin finished The Doctor's sentence for him.

"That was the voice of God"

"The voice within is the loudest voice with which God speaks, because it is the closest to you. It is the voice which tells you _right now_ whether the very words you are reading are words of love or words of fear. By this measure can you determine if they are words to heed… or words to ignore"

- 'Conversations with God' bk 1


	8. Chapter 8

**EIGHT**

"For six days, work is to be done, but the seventh day is a Sabbath of rest, holy to the LORD. Whoever does any work on the Sabbath day must be put to death" – Exodus 31: 15, The Bible

"Now, come on, Marty, remember what we've said…" The Doctor was looking back down at his controls. "That was the voice of _a _god… not _The _God" He tapped a few more keys on his controls. "That is… _if_ such a thing as _The God_ exists", he added quietly.

"But it _was_ God, Doctor" Martin surprised himself at his outburst. "You said so yourself! You said 'It _is_ their God, Martin'. I remember you saying it!"

"Yeah, I did and it is!" The Doctor spun around and grabbed hold of Martin's shoulders looking him directly in the eyes. He let out a deep breath and then breathed in sharply. "Look, Marty… I said it's _their _God… The Israelites… To _them_ he _was _their Creator… Their judge, jury and executioner… They were his 'chosen people'… He gave them rules of conduct… Commandments… And they were to obey him at all costs… And worship no other gods… If he told them to kill, they killed… And they did kill… And have been killing in his name ever since!"

The Doctor let go of Martin's shoulders and moved away from him. He thrust his hands back in his trusty pockets and began strolling around the console area with his head tilted back on an angle.

"Do you know, under his rule, if you worked on a Sunday… the 'Sabbath'… you'd be stoned to death? And I'm not talking fourteen hours on the sly mowing lawns for little old ladies or something… I'm talking about everyday stuff like collecting firewood. You know, doing something that your family needs just to survive. Nah, if you were caught… stoned to death. The wife and kids will have to get by on their own… in the cold!" He spun around to face Martin once more. "Can you imagine that? And If you were, say, a homosexual? Stoned to death… Committed adultery? Stoned to death… Disobedient kids? Stoned to death! Can you imagine living in such a society? The constant level of fear must have been paralysing." He paused to read information upon one of his screens. "And you know, some of these draconian rules are still enforced in your time! A lot of your society's beliefs and rules of order are based on the teachings that Yahweh gave his people. So, in that sense…" He broke off as if realising that the sentence he was about to say wasn't probably the most tactful in the universe. But he just couldn't help himself saying it anyway, "In that sense…he _has_ been God to your world… But, you know" he added hurriedly, "He was one of many" He smiled at Martin. As if that would help.

Martin's eyes were streaming with tears. He just couldn't help it. This was destroying him inside. Literally tearing his soul in two. How could this be true of God? How could 'God' be so evil? How could he be just an 'alien'… a flesh and blood being that just wanted humans to worship him? Worship him for… what? For the sake of his own ego? This went against all that he had previously thought and felt he knew about what god was… About what God is. He had thought that God was love. Where did love come into all this? What about spirituality? Was this terrifying creature Jesus' Father?

Martin found himself heading for his seat again. He could feel his legs giving way and his heart was pounding so much he felt it might even leave his body.

The Doctor stood still for a moment and calmly looked on as Martin plonked himself down on the leather chair. He smiled at him and moved slowly back over to where Martin was now sitting.

"I think we need to get some perspective on this, Martin." He said smiling calmly at him. "Don't worry, it's going to be alright." He tilted his head to one side. "Look… Listen…" The concentration on his face worried Martin slightly.

"What?" Martin whispered, "What is it?"

"I can hear the kettle boiling," said The Doctor casually, "The tea will be ready in a jiffy." He grinned at Martin and his eyes sparkled with delight. "Do you like Hob Nobs? Chocolate ones?"

Martin let out a laugh. He shook his head in disbelief at The Doctor's Cheshire cat smile. "Doctor, you are amazing!"

"Cheers" The Doctor seemed really pleased. He turned away and started walking towards the door at the back of the domed room.

"No, I mean, how can you be so calm? Is this not mind-blowing for you?" Martin's head continued to shake as he watched The Doctor leave the room into the darkness of the doorway.

"Nah, I've seen it all before, Marty, I told you!" He shouted from the blackness. The sound of mugs clashing and the shuffle of cutlery rang out in the dark. "I'm really going to have to get this light fixed in here," The Doctor said quietly.

Suddenly he was back in the room brandishing two mugs of sweet, hot tea. He handed one to Martin. The mug had a large picture of Bart Simpson on the side, winking at Martin as if he was in on the whole, cosmic joke.

The Doctor was already sipping at his own tea cautiously. His black mug had bright yellow writing on that said simply: 'I'm with stupid'. The Doctor winked at Martin and Martin frowned back at him.

"I hope you're not trying to tell me something, Doctor?" He said nodding towards the mug.

"What?" The Doctor turned the mug towards himself and let out a laugh. "Ha, pure coincidence, my friend" he said with a smile. "It was dark in there… I couldn't see a thing. I'll have Bart, if you want?" He held the cup out to Martin.

"No, you alright, Doctor" Martin laughed, "I'm happy with Bart!"

"Good" The Doctor beamed and nodded back at Martin. "And I'm happy with 'Stupid'!"

Both men laughed and took a deeper gulp of the sweet tea.

The liquid felt so good against the back of Martin's throat. There was something so wonderfully 'normal' about a cup of tea.

The floor of the TARDIS gave a tiny jolt and the deep throb of the machine's engines slowed down as Martin realised that they had landed.

"Ah, there we go" The Doctor turned to face his controls once more. "We're here."

"Where?" Martin gasped.

"Oh, somewhere safe. Don't let it worry you." He grabbed two deck chairs that were lent up against the side rail. "You take these, Marty" He handed them over to Martin who quickly grabbed them in his left hand "And I'll just grab my photo album." He marched off into the side room once more.

Martin took another mouthful of tea as The Doctor bounded back in the room carrying a huge thick book. He blew dust of the top and wiped it affectionately with his sleeve. He turned it round so it faced Martin.

On the cover of the brown, leather-bound book was some sort of, what Martin presumed to be, 'alien' writing. Circles intersected with other cycles and lines going off at tangents creating chaotic yet strangely ordered patterns. Underneath the strange patterns a biro had been used to write in plain English: 'The History of the Earth (Sol 3) In Pictures by Doctor John Smith. Vol: 1'

"Now, let's take our tea outside, let's sit down calmly and I'll tell you all about the real history of your tiny little world that will put Yahweh and his Angels into context" The Doctor was smiling intently at Martin and had a hand on the top of his book. "I'll even show you pictures." He grinned even wider as he tapped the photo album.

He moved past Martin and towards the doors that would lead outside. He opened them and light streamed in creating shadows across the TARDIS floor. The Doctor breathed in the air appreciatively and looked back at Martin.

"Are you coming?" He asked quietly.

"Do I have a choice?" Martin responded dejectedly.

"Oh Martin, you _always_ have a choice. Always" The Doctor mouth shone with a gentle smile.

"Can you take me home?" Martin's voice was a whisper.

"Yes… Yes, I can do that… if you want" The Doctor's smiled faded slightly.

"Can you make me forget?" Martin's eyes pleaded with The Doctor. "Can you make me forget what I've seen and remove the fear that you've… that 'he' put in me?"

The Doctor's smile had completely vanished. "No… No, I can't" He said gently "Well, not permanently anyway… But I can give you hope. I can make you see that life isn't about fear…. Fear paralyses… And I'm here to set you free"

Both men looked at each other intently. Martin stared into The Doctor's big brown eyes and, after a moment, he could almost feel himself falling into them. It had happened before outside the church and now it was happening again. A connection. It was like he was almost seeing The Doctor's soul….

"Not yet, Martin" The Doctor's voice was calm as he turned and looked away into the blue sky outside the ship. "I've just got to open your mind a little bit more before we can explore your soul" He turned back to Martin and smiled, "So… Are you ready for that now? Shall I tell you the deeper mysteries of mankind's creation? Shall I show you the time when I saw the pyramids being built? How I witnessed 'The Great Flood'? And shall we have a look and see when the universe itself really, truly began?" He held the TARDIS door open wide as Martin moved towards it. "And, most importantly, are we going to finish these cups of tea before they get cold or what?"

Both men grinned at each other as they stepped out of the TARDIS doors and into the sunlight.

"Truth does not change although your perception of it may vary or alter drastically" – John & Lyn St. Clair Thomas, 'Eyes of the Beholder'


	9. Chapter 9

**NINE**

"A heavenly body, possibly as large as the planet Jupiter and possibly so close to Earth that it would be part of this solar system, has been found in the direction of the constellation of Orion by an orbiting telescope…. 'All I can tell you is that we don't know what it is,' said Gerry Neugebauer, chief IRAS Scientist"

– The Washington Post 1982

"This looks like a good spot"

The Doctor was standing perfectly still and holding his photo album to his chest whilst gazing out across the huge expanse in front of him. He looked casually around to see Martin staggering up behind him clutching tightly to the two folded deck chairs.

"Yeah, let's plonk them down here, Marty" The Doctor said stamping the ground with his left foot. "We've got a great view here… It's even better than the one we had when we first met!" He nodded out towards the beautiful scenery.

They were stood, yet again, on a huge hill. The terrain in front of them was a mixture of grass and sand and, most evidently, Martin could see what looked like some sort of primitive city. He could make out dwellings that were more like mud huts and he could see tiny dots in the distance that were obviously people going around their daily business. The area directly in front of where Martin and The Doctor were stood must have gone on for miles and a shimmering heat haze hid the distant horizon.

By now The Doctor had taken the chairs from Martin and had unfolded them with lightning speed. He was already sat down and was hunched forward with his precious photo album clamped between his knees.

Martin sat down slowly beside him. "Where…. And _when_ … are we, Doctor?" He asked softly.

The Doctor looked around at him. "Oh, that doesn't matter right now, Marty" He said breezily, "We're safe and we've got a great view". He sniffed the air appreciatively "And, besides… I don't want to spoil the surprise"

Before Martin could respond with yet more questions The Doctor was opening the photo album and pointing at the first page. He handed the book to Martin who took it cautiously.

What was he going to see inside it? Was he sure he _really_ wanted to know?

On the first page was a sharp, clear picture of a beautiful, blue planet. It was Earth.

"Touch the picture, Marty" The Doctor said smiling softly.

Martin put the tip of his finger on the picture and the image came to life like someone had just released the 'pause' button on a DVD. The perfect blue pearl of a planet rotated slowly and majestically, as thin, white clouds danced and swirled with shades of grey and black.

"Beautiful" Martin whispered to himself.

"So…" The Doctor began, "This is the Earth. In many ways, an unremarkable little planet that was formed around 4.5 billion years ago in this tiny part of the universe you've come to know as the Milky Way. One of ten planets that was formed around that sun…" He looked up from the album and pointed up at the bright orb in the sky, "Which is, of course, just one of billions and billions of stars that make up this tiny, little corner of the cosmos." He looked at Martin, "Hey, here's a little bit of universal perspective for you." He cleared his throat and carried on, "Do you know that if the history of your planet Earth was comparable to a year long calendar then mankind has only been around for the last thirty seconds of December the 31st?" He grinned happily at Martin as if that sentence had just summed up everything that needed to be said.

Martin didn't look impressed. His face was blank and expressionless as his mouth hung open slightly like a particularly bored goldfish.

The Doctor's face fell suddenly as if his best joke had just fallen on deaf ears. Undefeated, his smile returned suddenly, "And, of course, the Universe itself is 14 billion years old, so that makes the Earth a bit of a toddler of a planet when compared to other worlds out there." He looked at Martin expectedly. Again Martin was silent and was simply staring back down at the photo album.

Still undeterred The Doctor carried on, "So, in other words, Yahweh _didn't_ create the universe and all the 'heavenly realms', as much as his followers would _love_ to have you believe, and his dealings with Earth are just nano- seconds ago when compared to the vastness of the universe and time itself."

He grinned his best grin and nodded at Martin excitedly as if he'd just given him the final clue to a long forgotten puzzle.

Martin's silence was just too much for The Doctor. "Well?" He asked impatiently, "What do you think?"

"Errmmm…" Martin struggled to reply, "…ok" He responded softly, "I'm with you so far."

"Good" The Doctor frowned and then smiled as he took the album back off Martin and turned to the next page, "So… life evolved here, like it does… amoebas, amphibians, dinosaurs, mammals, apes…" He flicked through the pages and Martin glimpsed pictures of huge dinosaurs and beautiful, colourful animals. He saw images of ape like creatures, giant woolly mammoths and sabre tooth tigers that were surrounded by piercing white snow. "So everything was evolving fine and dandy on it's own when…." He turned another page to show an image of another planet. This one had reds and browns mixed in with blues and whites as The Doctor touched the picture to bring it too life. "This is Nibiru and, as all the ancient, _ancient_ texts will tell you… this was the home of the Gods."

Martin gazed at the sphere as the Doctor's voice carried on…

"This is the legendary tenth planet of your solar system… the famous 'lost' planet… and the reason it is lost is it's orbit takes it away from this part of the solar system every 3,600 years and it's periodic returns have seeded life on Earth and accelerated it's evolution. The inhabitants of Nibiru came to earth around 200,000 years ago and genetically interfered with mankind's evolution and created you guys." He nodded at Martin. "Hence, the 'missing link' between ape and man. That's why scientists can't explain mankind's sudden evolutionary jump 200,000 years ago. But the truth is you just got a 'jump start'… a 'push up' the evolutionary scale."

He closed the book but kept his hand inside so as not to lose his page. "One of the first lines in the book of Genesis in your Bible originally said, 'In the beginning Elohim said 'Let us create mankind in _our_ image… in _our_ likeness'. Now 'Elohim'… the original word for 'god'… translates as '_those_ that came from the sky'. It was plural. God wasn't one mighty ruler but flesh and blood beings that created mankind in their own image. _All_ your ancient religions and holy books have _always_ said this but over time the message has been lost as monotheism … the belief in just 'one' god…. Has been slowly edited into the fabricated history of your world."

He opened the book again and showed Martin the image. It was a picture of a man who wore an impossibly long scarf. He was holding his hat tight to his head and pointing at two huge domes that filled the landscape behind him.

The Doctor touched the image and the screen sprang to life.

"I'm standing in front of the in-famous Gardens of Eden" The man in the picture shouted above the wind that tore at his scarf and hat. "The Elohim have been busy working on their 'slave race' and it all seems to be going smoothly."

The picture slowly panned to the left and Martin could see inside the huge domes more clearly. He could see massive green trees, water falls and beautifully coloured flowers scattered through out the domes. He could also see human beings laughing and playing happily together whilst others swam in the picturesque lakes and fountains.

The camera panned upwards and Martin could make out figures in the sky floating down on shining discs. The scarf wearing man had been smiling all the time into the camera and had yet to see the figures behind getting closer to him. His face fell suddenly as he looked beyond the camera at whoever was operating it. "Are you ok, Sarah? You look at little pale," he said worryingly.

The image froze again and Martin looked up at The Doctor.

"Slave race?" Martin asked hesitantly.

The Doctor sucked air threw his teeth. "Yeah, I'm afraid so. Mankind was originally created to work 'the toil of the gods', as the ancient Sumerian texts say. Which was mining, really. Where do you think the idea of the 'underworld'… 'Hell', if you like… came from?"

"Mining for what?" Martin's voice cracked and spluttered.

"Gold" The Doctor said simply. "As boring and as ordinary as that sounds, that's what the Gods wanted... Gold…. Along with other minerals common to the Earth but rare on other worlds… But gold has certain properties… very powerful properties… that mankind hasn't even tapped yet. The ancients knew this that's why…" He turned another page and the image was of three gleaming, majestic pyramids. "That's why the Pharaohs of Egypt were obsessed with the stuff. One of their many gods, Marduk, told them that 'Gold is the splendour of life'."

With a touch from The Doctor's finger the picture sprang into action. The pyramids were more beautiful than Martin had ever imagined. The sides were almost reflectively bright and perfectly smooth, the tip of each one shone like white gold and, as the camera moved around, Martin could see small flying vessels racing through the clear blue sky.

The Doctor turned yet another page and Martin gazed intently at the image. A small man with a Beatles-like haircut stood next to a strong, stern looking individual with a neat, trimmed beard and sharp, dark clothes.

"Now, this is… well, the Aztecs called him Nene whilst in the near east he was Atra-Hasis, Utnapishtim or Ziusudra…. As you're from the west you may know him as Noah… and he and his family are the only ones who survived the 'great flood' as it has been called. In reality, the great flood happened not because of 'God's judgement' but because the planet Nibiru, in one of its 'visits', got so close to the earth's own orbit that it was castrosophic for this planet and, of course, pretty bleak for mankind too… It ripped the planets land mass to shreds killing every one and everything apart from this guy, his family and their collection of genetic samples for every living creature"

He tapped the picture and the image became alive. "Hold the camera still please, Jamie." The little man said, "Have you got it on?… Yes?… Good… Now, this is… well, let's call him Noah and these…" He held up two tiny discs like objects, "These hold the genetic prints for every species of buffalo and warthog you can think of. And he's got the rest of the entire animal kingdom in there, on these little floppy discs" The little man nodded off camera and the image spun round to show a huge, wooden boat that was stood on dry land.

"Oh, it's starting to rain, Doctor" said a Scottish voice from behind the camera.

The image spun round once more to face the little, dark haired man "Yes, Jamie… I do maybe think it's time we were off". The image froze once more on the little man's impish face.

"Oh, I was so cute" The Doctor said happily. "And look," he added, "The animals _did_ go in two by two". He tapped the side of his deck chair with his finger twice as if slotting a floppy disc into place.

"How did Noah get the technology for those discs?" Martin said shaking his head in bewilderment.

"Mankind had evolved side by side with their gods, Marty. Have you not been listening? There was thousands of years between the creation of man and the 'Great Flood'…. In fact, about 187,000 years to be precise… A lot had happened… Wars had been fought…. In 'heaven' _and_ on earth… Millions upon millions of human lives had been lost under the lordship of the gods and their many wars, which they seemed to just love creating." He turned another page. "Because the gods had themselves been genetically enhanced to live for many millennia they ruled and subjugated for centuries, appearing immortal to their worshippers. Even the first humans were gifted, at first, with amazingly long life. Even in the plain texts of the Bible some of the characters in there were said to have lived for hundreds and hundreds of years. It was more like thousands of years, if we're been honest!"

Martin looked down at the page. It showed, what looked like, a gleaming, golden air craft.

"Human achievement evolved too" The Doctor said calmly. He looked around at Martin "You remember the story of 'The Tower of Babel', don't you? Well, the 'Tower of Babel' was in fact a craft built by mankind that would have taken them to the stars. But the gods destroyed it as they started to believe their creations were getting too big for their boots, as it were. These humans needed holding down…. Put in line" The Doctor closed his book and looked off into the distance. "They initiated wars, armed kings with powerful weapons and often marched with them against places like Babylon and Egypt. They launched a long-term program of undercover operations, like the Immigration of the Jews into Egypt, the Exodus… and we saw that first hand, didn't we?" He nodded gently at Martin. "Look" He pointed down at the book and Martin saw Yahweh's huge mother ship that he had just seen himself hovering over Mount Sinai. On the facing page Martin saw a picture of himself stood next to the Doctor. The Doctor's arm was wrapped around him and the grin on The Doctor's face was completely at odds with the sad, tearful look that dominated Martin's own face. It was the picture the old gentleman, the 'other Doctor', had taken earlier. "Ah" The Doctor let out a squeal of recognition. "I'd always wondered when that as going to be taken" He let out a laugh and tapped Martin affectionately on the back.

"So, basically, the gods initiated development into paths of conflicts, neutralizing the development of civilizations based on science and learning. To keep control through 'blind faith' they made sure the replacement of science and philosophy was taken by the introduction of doctrines and dogma, along with the persecution of people outside of 'The Chosen Ones' and the burning of books. If you questioned any of this you were destroyed instantly and condemned as a 'devil worshipper'."

The Doctor stared down at the photo album and touched the image of Yahweh's Mother ship. It's menacing bulk rotated as dark clouds bellowed out surrounding the huge vessel.

Martin literally shivered at seeing the sight of it again.

"Now, Yahweh had his own agenda and wanted to be worshipped as the 'One True God'. His first commandment was to love him and only him and to put no other gods before him. The only way forward for Yahweh was to create a new covenant of trust and a loyalty to one god alone. This he tried to do through the Israelites. Only in that way could he bring forth a new generation that was untainted by the polytheism of the Egyptians. Yahweh believed that only through monotheism could mankind be truly subjugated."

The Doctor stopped for breath and, just as he was about to start speaking again, he turned to Martin, smiling weakly at him.

"How are you feeling now?" He asked softly.

"I feel like I'm having my head mangled into pulp, to be honest," Martin said dejectedly, letting out a small nervous laugh. He shook his head and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "Can I just stop you there, Doctor, and ask: Where is love in all this?"

The Doctor seemed taken aback for a split second and then smiled warmly at Martin. "Good old Martin. That's what I like to see. You're not taking any one's word for anything."

He stood up and then stood in front of Martin, blocking the sun's rays from hitting the man's tired face. "I'm glad you asked me that because we really do need to get to 'love' at some point, don't we?"

"Yes… yes we do. It's just that, all this talk of aliens and gods and wars…" Martin began, "It's like… how did spirituality evolve from this? Is love just a chemical imbalance in the human brain or something? How could all this be true? I don't get it. I just don't get it!"

Martin's head sank down as he put his head between his knees and stared at the green grass beneath his feet.

"I'll tell you what you need" The Doctor said patting Martin gently on the top of his head, "You need to speak to someone who's knows what they are talking about with regards this whole 'love' thing." He smiled his best smile at Martin. "Now I did promise I'd bring you here and I'm not one to go back on a promise"

Martin looked up and around him. "Here?" He said softly. "Where _is _here?"

The Doctor looked at him and smiled. He moved out of the way of Martin's view and pointed at the primitive city in front of them. "That's Nazareth down there and it's 29AD. I've brought you to where you said you wanted to go"

He looked at Martin, as a look of realization dawned across the man's face.

"Jesus…" The Doctor nodded, "I've brought you to see Jesus"

"The past is dead

The Future is imaginary

Happiness can only be

In the Eternal Now Moment"

- Ken Keyes JR


	10. Chapter 10

**TEN**

"Then I heard a loud voice speaking from the temple to the seven angels: "Go and pour out the seven bowls of God's anger on the earth!"

"The First Angel blew his trumpet. Hail and fire, mixed with blood, came pouring down on the earth…"

"And all were judged according to what they had done. Whoever did not have his name written in the book of the living was thrown into the lake of fire"

"Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth. I heard a loud voice speaking from the throne: "Now God's home is with mankind! He will live with them, and they shall be his people"

"… The Angel carried me to the top of a very high mountain. He showed me Jerusalem, The Holy city, coming down out of Heaven from God and shining with the Glory of God. The city shone like a precious stone, like a jasper, clear as crystal"

–Extracts from The Book of Revelation, The Bible

"What?" Martin was shaking his head in bewilderment. "We're in Nazareth and we've come to see Jesus?"

"Yep, that's where we are and that's what we're here for, isn't it?" The Doctor said, pushing the bottom of his lip out as he spoke.

"Well, yes…. I suppose… I just never thought…" Martin began.

"Well, let's get on with it then." The Doctor began walking back towards where the TARDIS was parked. "We're going to need a change of clothes. We can't go down there dressed like this. We'd stand out like a hippo at an 'All Ants' party!"

"But, Doctor" Martin shouted as the Doctor stepped through the TARDIS door, "I cant speak… what is it… Ancient Hebrew? How am I even going to be able to understand what Jesus is saying?" He looked back around at the primitive city below, shaking his head at the crazy sentence he'd just muttered.

The Doctor pocked his head back outside the door. "Don't worry about it. Marty. Neither can I!" He tapped the side of the time machine affectionately. "The TARDIS does all the translating for us. It's gets inside of your head and decodes the neural interfaces. Think of it like a 'Universal Translator'… you know, like in Star Trek!" His head vanished inside again. "I'm not even speaking English now" He shouted, "Or even anything remotely 'human', come to mention it! I'm an alien, remember? I'm actually speaking ancient Galifreyan…" His voice slowly disappeared inside the ship.

Martin let out a laugh. What a crazy situation to be in. Only hours before he had buried his Nan and now he was time travelling with an alien and going to meet Jesus. He knew that Jesus was the only man his Nan spoke of with more clarity and love than any other individual. If only she could be here. She _deserved_ to be here.

Martin gazed over at The Doctor's photo album, which had been left face down in his chair. He picked it up and opened it randomly. Let's face it, he thought, any picture was bound to be one of great importance.

He saw a picture of The Doctor stood with his arm around a man that looked a lot like a guy Martin knew who worked at the local supermarket. He wore grey, simple clothes, his skin was a light brown and his eyes a piercing blue. His dark hair was cut quite short and his beard was neatly trimmed.

Martin tapped the image. The Doctor's grin sprang into life, "Go on… Tell them what you've just told me," he said happily, hugging the man tighter around the shoulder.

"God is love" The man smiled with a beautiful smile and the image froze again.

Martin turned the next few pages seeing images of men on horses, beautiful scenery, people shaking hands and even a picture of a man with a bright, multi-coloured coat pulling a sword from a large stone.

Even more pictures showed knights in armour, men with incredibly strange wigs wearing bright make up and soldiers in uniform. Sometimes one of the 'Other Doctors' were stood in the pictures, usually grinning and looking all self satisfied.

Martin realised he must be nearing the end of the book as he started to see faces he recognised. A huge close up of Hitler looking incredibly angry made Martin recoil as he turned the page. He was going to touch the picture but then thought better of it.

Images of hundreds of soldiers fighting in the trenches followed, along with pictures of John F Kennedy, Martin Luther King and Gandhi. One picture showed The Doctor playing guitar behind Elvis Presley, a huge grin across the time traveller's face as he looked, 'hero-worship' like, towards the King. On turning the page Martin saw the 'Old gentleman' Doctor stood disapprovingly next to George Bush. President Bush was looking furious at his obviously unwelcome visitor. The next page brought the unwelcome image of the Twin towers in New York with two gaping holes in their sides.

The next page after that showed two men dressed in shabby clothes clutching Bibles close to their chests. Martin's eyes moved to the next page where he saw huge groups of people burning various flags and books. Next was an aerial shot of a giant military fleet spread out on a huge ocean followed by an image of thousands of soldiers preparing for an obviously massive battle.

On turning the next page Martin's heart froze.

The image was of a deep, red mushroom cloud filling the screen with anger and destruction. Next were pictures of devasted cities, he recognised parts of New York and London among the rubble, and horrible images of charred bodies and death on an unimaginable scale.

Martin's eyes were full of tears and his heart raced as he realised he was literally seeing the end of the world.

He could see that there was just one more page to look at and he turned it nervously wiping his eyes as he did so.

He almost dropped the book as he saw the image of Yahweh's Mother ship floating above the burning world. It was no longer hidden in clouds like before but shone majestically with blues and reds, which sprang out of the dark metal.

With his hands shaking uncontrollably Martin tapped the image.

The sound of the deep trumpet blast of the Angels rang out from the picture as the huge bulk of a ship rotated slowly, shining it's piercing light over the devastation and into the lens of the camera. Giant metallic Angels flew in the darkened, red sky around the craft. They were looking down at thousands upon thousands of human beings who were walking, arms outstretched towards the Mother ship. Most of the humans were dressed in rags, some were horribly disfigured and all were crying desperately.

As the camera swept round Martin could see some of the Angels swooping downward, screaming their deep, juddering cry as they did so. They picked up four or five people at a time, wrapping them in their giant wings before throwing the terrified, wailing humans into a giant lake of bright, burning fire.

Suddenly a man's face appeared on the screen, with the light from the Mother ship behind him making a halo effect around his dark, bloodied features.

"Praise him!" The man shouted manically "God has returned to judge us! Praise God for bringing his wrath upon us! God is great! God is great!"

The image froze on the man's crazed expression.

Martin threw the book on the soil below his feet and cried out with a deep, primitive howl. It was as if the sharp, numbing pain came from his very soul itself.

"What are you doing?" The Doctor's voice suddenly rang out from behind him. "You haven't been looking at my book, have you? You've not been taking a sneaky look at the future…?"

"Yes… Yes, of course I have, Doctor! What did you expect me to do?" Martin turned angrily around at The Doctor who was bounding up to him at quite a pace. "You can't leave a book like that lying around and expect me not to take a look! I thought you wanted me to know anyway?" Martin voice was raised and full of hurt and raw emotion.

"Well, you know… I could have maybe broke it to you more gently" The Doctor said cautiously, bending down to pick up the book.

"What?… More gently than 'Look, Marty, your world is going to end very soon in unimaginable terror and bloodshed and there's fuck all you can do about it'!" Martin looked up at The Doctor, his face contorted with anguish. "Oh and 'Yahweh really _is _God and he's going to punish you're very soul eternally like nobody's business for been such a useless sinner'!"

The Doctor shrugged "Well, you know, technically 'Hell' doesn't really exist and is just something the Church has played on over the years to scare believers into believing. The 'second death', as it's called, is just 'nothing-ness'… A return to the state you were in before you were born. Even the Jehovah's Witnesses don't believe in Hell!" His eyebrows narrowed and he frowned intently as he looked down at the image in the opened book. "And I suppose _that_ means that the JW's were 'right', after all" His eyebrows raised and his mouth dropped, "And that's a bit of a 'living hell' in itself, isn't it?"

"This is Hell, Doctor!" Martin shouted stabbing his finger against the image making it flicker and then pause. "All those billions of people… Dead!"

The Doctor's eyebrows narrowed "Oh, come on, Marty… I thought you were a good Catholic boy? Have you never read 'The Revelation of St John'? You've never heard of The End of Days… The Second Coming… Armageddon? The Two Witnesses that give mankind their 'Last Chance to worship God before The End'? Most of your religious theologies are based around this idea of 'The Final Judgement'. I didn't think that this would be so much of a surprise for you, to be honest"

He looked down on Martin as if almost disappointed in him.

"I don't think religious people are expecting God to be bloody ET, Doctor!" Martin almost spat the words out.

The Doctor shook his head "Well, it's only a small sideways step from what they do believe, if we're been honest, Marty. True, they don't see him as an 'alien', as such, but most believers believe that 'God' is the King of 'Heaven' and he has his Angels do his bidding. And they believe he's perfectly in his rights to wipe out mankind in the most bloodthirsty way possible if he sees fit. After all… they believe he's done it before. Remember 'The Great flood'?"

"But you said…" Martin began.

"Yeah, well, Yahweh didn't _cause_ the Great Flood, but he certainly made the most out of his worshippers t_hinking_ that he did!" The Doctor rolled his head to one side. "And also, you see, believers in the 'End Times' very much believe that God will make a physical intervention in the world and literally wipe everything clean and start again. So what if 6 billion people have to die in the process? They believe that God is a god who doesn't like to be questioned and whose judgement is harsh and just. And they believe that 'Heaven' isn't a spiritual afterlife for every body but a physical resurrection for the faithful few to live forever on a paradise Earth. Yahweh…or Jehovah or Allah or whatever he wants to call himself once he is here… He resurrects 144,000 to govern over Mankind with him in the 'Heavens' and the Earth starts again under the iron rule of a great and terrible God!" He raised both hands up to the sky in mock praise "Then mankind can spend all day, every day worshiping The One True God who has finally come back to reek his terrible vengeance over all the world!" He then turned round to Martin and shrugged.

"Well cheers, Doctor, you've really made my day!" Martin shouted sarcastically. "Brilliant! Just brilliant! The world is going to end and God is nothing more than an egotistical alien with a jealous need to be 'praised' every second of every day! And all the love, creativity and accomplishments of mankind are just pointless, puny and totally unnecessary! Excellent! If I could feel any smaller I'd be a… Termite!"

"Oh, I like termites!" The Doctor grinned.

Martin looked up at him slowly. If looks could kill The Doctor would have been lying on the ground, cut into a thousand pieces.

The Doctor paused for just a second and then turned his frown on Martin. "You know when you're out for a walk in the countryside, Marty, and your taking in all that lovely scenery…." The Doctor sat down on the deck chair next to Martin, "Do you think about where you're standing and what you might be standing on?"

Martin shook his head in his best 'what has this got to do with anything' way.

"What?"

"Do you think that maybe every other step you take you may be killing ants, grubs… maybe even the odd termite?" The Doctor's eyebrows were raised.

"I… I don't really know…. I haven't really thought about it" Martin responded carefully.

"Mmmm… interesting" The Doctor said softly.

Martin looked around at him once more. "So what? Now you are saying that humans are nothing more than Ants and Termites to Yahweh and his 'ancients'?"

"Well, you said that not me. I'm just pointing out perspectives" The Doctor let out a slight smile. "Anyway" he said, standing up rubbing his hands together, "All this is irrelevant. Shall we go and see Jesus, or what?"

Martin shook his head slowly as if he just couldn't believe that The Doctor could still ask. "What would be the point? Yahweh's his Dad! He's obviously going to say 'Get in line… Fear God… Yahweh will smite his enemies… Prepare for the end of the world… In the last days I'm going to return on clouds of great glory and God will judge all mankind'." He turned to look at The Doctor "I've heard the story, Doctor… I've _seen _the story… and it's the most depressing thing I've ever heard in my life!" He lurched forward, rested his elbows on his knees and lowered his head. His whole body shook as he started to sob uncontrollably.

"Is that it then, Marty? Are you just going to give up like that? How disappointing" The Doctor walked around Martin, his hands rooted firmly in his pockets.

"What do you want me to do, Doctor? You've shown me the 'Truth', haven't you? Just like you promised. Well, the 'Truth' you've shown me stinks! Please just take me home so I can die along with the rest of the world… Along with the rest of my family!"

Martin suddenly thought back to his partner at home… Their daughter… His own Mum… His brother and sister…His favourite Aunty… His friends…"Oh my god, my family! They'll all be…" He stopped himself from thinking what his family would be. "It's all because of _him_, isn't it? This was _his_ plan all along. Create a world… or, at least, influence a mind-set of nations where people will fight over _him_ and about who is _right_ about _him_! Thus creating a self fulfilling prophecy where mankind brings about its own Armageddon whilst all the time believing they're doing the will of their own particular 'all loving God'" Martin fidgeted, picking skin from the tips of his dried fingers at the same time as wiping his eyes dry. "It'd be brilliant if it wasn't so horrific!" He shook his head and closed his eyes "And with all I've seen… all I've done… all my 'sins'…They'll be no room for me in Yahweh's kingdom… I know that for a fact!"

"Oh, I don't know, Marty" The Doctor said, almost casually, "You could get down on your knees… Beg to be forgiven for all your sins… Praise God to the max and promise to love Him for all time and maybe, just maybe… if He's in a good mood on that particular day… you'd be resurrected to live forever on a paradise Earth"

"I wouldn't want to be, Doctor" Martin said quietly but forcefully. "How can anyone truly love someone they fear?"

He bowed his head between his legs once more. "God is Love? God is Fear!" He started to sob again, "God is fear," he gasped softly between tears.

The Doctor remained silent. He walked a few paces towards the edge of the hill, put his book in one hand, picked up a small stone with the other and gazed intently at it's jagged, grey surface.

After a few more moments he turned around and stared at Martin's lowered head.

"Well… 'Truth' is fluid, you know" The Doctor said calmly, throwing the stone gently in the air and catching it repeatedly.

"What?" Martin didn't even bother to look up; he'd dug out an old hanky from his coat and was blowing his nose loudly.

"Truth… is… fluid… How can all that you've just seen be 'True', eh? It can't, can it? A 'god of Fear'? And an alien one at that? I ask you… you didn't believe all that did you? As you said, 'Where's the love?' Where's the spirituality?" The Doctor smiled down at Martin. "I told you I was here to give you hope… And I am."

He threw the little stone at Martin's feet and Martin could see it now glistened like a perfect ruby. He narrowed his eyes to look at it more intently but couldn't bring himself to pick it up.

The Doctor clutched his photo album to his chest and was stood, once more, blocking the suns rays from hitting the broken man's pale complexion.

"What you've seen so far is 'The Fear of God'. I had to show you that… I had to let you _think_ about that… To _remember_ it… before we moved on to 'higher' Truth… There's more going on here than you know, Marty. There are higher dimensions at work… A grander scheme is in place"

He bent down and picked up the ruby stone from the dirt near Martin's left shoe. He held it up to the sun and peered inside its almost transparent mass.

"Everything we've done so far is to look outwards… We've looked out at the vast universe, we've learnt about ancient Gods from the deep and distant past and we've gazed into a dark, fearful future that has terrified you more than any other thing you have ever seen"

"You're not lying there, Doctor" Martin muttered, his head still bowed.

The Doctor slowly brought the ruby close up to his right eye and tried to look through it at Martin. "Now it's time to go _within_ and learn about the vast universe _inside_ of you. Now it's time to concentrate on this moment right _now_ and not let the past or the future paralyse you with fear"

Martin finally gazed up at The Doctor's face. "What… What are you saying, Doctor?"

"Shall we try again? Shall we change the 'Truth'? Shall we have another _thought_ about it? Shall we see what God would be like if God really _is_ love?" He smiled broadly down at Martin as the man's posture relaxed slightly and hope began appearing on his tear stained face.

"And how do we do that?" Martin asked softly.

"By doing this"

The Doctor closed his eyes gently and clutched the book tighter to his chest. He breathed in slowly and, as he did, his whole body seemed to glow from within. Tiny cracks of light erupted from the book and made gentle, fizzing sounds as it emerged, yet the Doctor's calm smile remained constant and reassuring. His skin glowed as if transparent as bright yellows and soothing whites seemed to dance within his very body.

After a few seconds the radiant glow faded away and The Doctor slowly opened his eyes to see Martin's astonished face.

"It's ok, Marty" The Doctor said smiling calmly at him, "It's all good from here"

He turned the book around so Martin could see the cover. The book looked completely different. It was now a beautiful red colour where as before it was a dark brown. On the front of the book were big, bold letters that said simply 'The Book of Life'.

"So…" The Doctor said softly, "Shall we have another go?"

"Dwell not in the past… Use it to illustrate a point… Then leave it behind.

Nothing really matters… Except what you do now… In this instant of time"

- Eileen Caddy, 'God Spoke To Me'


	11. Chapter 11

**ELEVEN**

"Remember… It's always your _new thought_ that creates your reality. Always" – 'Conversations with God' Book 2

"What are you talking about, Doctor?" Martin was still sat down on his deck chair but was now lent forward, his elbows resting on his knees.

"Well…" The Doctor began.

"Are you saying that everything I have seen and everything you have told me is a… lie!" Martin's voice was raised. This was all _way_ too much for him now.

"Well, if you…" The Doctor tried to continue.

"Because if it is, Doctor, I'm not happy about it! I'm not happy about it at all!" Martin's face was full of hurt and anguish and was somewhere between red and a deep, dull grey in colour.

"Well, if you just let me…" The Doctor tried again.

"I just can't believe you've done this to me! All this time you've…" Martin's head was shaking.

"If you just let me finish!" The Doctor literally shouted the words out. His voice echoed around their craggy surroundings and Martin could have sworn he even saw heads turn in the city below.

The Doctor composed himself, gently put his book face down on a soft clump of grass, tugged at his coat collar and then, slowly, returned to his usual calm demeanour. He sat down casually in the deck chair next to Martin and lowered his voice to just above a whisper.

"What you have seen and been told is _not _a lie… but, then again, it's not a _truth_ either… It's a _possibility_… A _perhaps_ and a _maybe_… And, most of all… it's a _thought_…" He looked around at Martin almost casually "It's _your _thought, actually"

Martin was almost breathless. "What? What are you talking about? I've never thought these things before in my life!"

The Doctor looked away, stood up once more, buried his hands in his trouser pockets and twisted the tip of his plimsoll into the soft sand under his foot.

"Oh, I know you don't think you have, Marty… but you have. You've just _forgotten_ that you have" He gazed out at the city below "You're a big sci-fi fan, Marty, and you have been all your life… Stuff like this has been on your mind for years and years. You've always had your head in the clouds or stuffed in an 'Alien Encounters' or 'Ancient Myths' book. Tie that all in with some door stop encounters with Jehovah's Witnesses, a literal translation of Biblical passages and your own morbid fascination with 'End Times Prophecy' and… 'Bingo' … Instant 'Alien God of fear' complex!"

He tilted his head to look towards the sun, squinted and then continued, "So you made it all up… this whole thing… with the power of your own thought. You gave yourself this whole experience and made yourself believe all these fearful things. That's how powerful thought is, Marty. Never underestimate the power of thought!" The Doctor spun around and raised his eyebrows as he stared intently at Martin's still shaking head. "You did a good job, though, putting it all together! Top marks for effort and all that! You even had _me_ convinced at one stage!" He shrugged his shoulders as if admitting infallibility, "But only for a second, though!" He added with a smile and then walked around the back of Martin's chair "You see, you've always wanted to tie it all together… Get some answers…" He nodded over at his TARDIS "_And_ you've always wanted to go on a trip through time and space with me" The Doctor beamed his broad smile down at Martin's confused face.

"I have no idea what you are talking about, Doctor" Martin couldn't shake his head any more if he tried. "I've never even seen you before in my life! This is madness! How can I have _forgotten _all of this?" His eyes implored The Doctor's for truth... _The _Truth.

"Because we made a deal, Marty" The Doctor's voice was calm and low. "The only way to do this was for you to forget everything you thought you knew… You had to have a 'clean slate', as it were… And an open mind… An open _soul_… For this to work… Otherwise… Well, just what would be the point, eh?" He shrugged his shoulders and lowered the sides of his mouth.

"But why would I make myself experience my worst fears about God if they weren't True? Why would I choose to _forget_… and then make my self experience all of my _'forgotten'_ fears as a terrifying reality?" Martin's voice was brittle and cracked as he spoke.

"Well, that's one of the biggest mysteries of mankind itself, isn't it?" The Doctor said, breathing in sharply. "Why do you all draw all of your worst fears towards you? You all do it…. Well, maybe not all of you and maybe not as literally as all of this, but a lot humans dwell on negativity and fear… That's one of the many reasons your world is in the state it's in"

He suddenly spun around on one leg a full 360 degrees and then stopped himself abruptly in the exact same position he was just stood in. He winked at Martin cheekily and smiled with his big toothy grin

"And I'm here to help you dwell in the positive and love!"

"I don't get it… I just don't get it at all" Martin's head was spinning at an incredible rate. He could feel his grasp on reality slowly fading…

"I know you don't get it, Marty, but that's fine… that's cool. But you will 'get it' very, very soon… And in that moment your soul will jump for joy" The Doctor smiled his very best smile "Everything is how it should be… The plan's working… The pieces are in place…We are the _right_ people in the _right _place at the _right_ time. There's more going on here than just 'An Adventure in Time and Space with The Good Doctor'!" He said in his best 'Film Trailer' voice. He then tapped Martin on the shoulder and the tired man look around slowly. The Doctor leaned forward and put his lips just inches from Martin's left ear. "You're going to love how all this ends… believe me. You'll be knocked out by how clever we've been"

Martin looked at The Doctor sharply, his frown created deep lines in his forehead. "I'm really not that bothered right now about how '_clever_' we've been, Doctor! If this has all just been a _lie_ that I've created in my own head… I just want it to stop! I either just want to wake up from whatever nightmare this is or I want the _lies_ to stop! I want to stop hearing… I want to stop _seeing _lies and I want some _truth_! Honest to goodness, straight down the line Truth! With a capital 'T'! Can you give me that much, Doctor?"

His eyes implored The Doctor's once more. The Doctor smiled gently into the tired man's face and nodded his head slowly in the affirmative.

"Yes, Martin… I can give you Truth" the Time Lord said gently "In fact, I can give you something that will make you never doubt the validity of your own soul ever again"

The Doctor moved towards Martin and stood directly in front of where the man was sat. He reached inside one of his deep pockets and brought out his tiny 'Ruby' stone. He played with it in his right hand, spinning it around and around between his fingers.

"Let's forget all that we think we know about God and about what life is, ok, Marty?" The Doctor nodded down at Martin. "Let's strip away all we have been told about what is truth. Can you do that? Can you allow your soul to contemplate something new?"

Martin nodded. "Yes… I think I can… Well, I'll try anyway"

"There is no trying, Marty... Only doing" The Doctor suddenly frowned at his own words "And if you get me saying stuff like that again I'm going to end up sounding like Yoda!"

Martin let out a laugh and The Doctor did the same.

"Good man, Marty. Now relax and listen to me… If you took _away_ all the dogma… the rituals and rules of all religions and spiritual paths, what do you think would be the _one_ statement they could _all_ actually _agree_ on? What one _tiny_ sentence about God would have _all_ believers say 'oh yes, that _is_ actually true'?"

Martin let out a little laugh "I think I know the answer, Doctor…My Aunty… My favourite Aunty… Mary… she always used to tell me this story whenever I'd give her a lift home after she'd been at the communion wine…" He smiled at the memory of her face; her cheeks were always a deep purple-ish red whenever she had a drink. "She told me that when she was at school the Headmaster asked all the school assembly the question 'What is God?' She said she knew the answer and wanted to scream it out but she daren't in case the answer was wrong"

The Doctor smiled softly at Martin. "And what was Aunty Mary's answer?"

"God is love" Martin said softly "She said 'God is love'"

The Doctor nodded, gently smiled and knelt down in front of Martin's chair. He looked deeply into the man's eyes and smiled warmly at him. Martin stared back into The Doctor's deep brown eyes…

He could see lights dancing within them…

"Do you know what _love_ is, Martin?" The Doctor said softly…"It's the same thing as your _soul_…"

Martin suddenly felt himself falling forward… into The Doctor's eyes…

Falling…

Falling…

All the way to his very soul…

_Connection_

_Love_

'_Yes'_

A blissful, euphoric energy exploded in the centre of Martin's very being. The burning, orgasmic pulse ripped through his body as he fell in ecstasy to his knees overcome with the beautiful embrace of the sensation.

He cried out as if in pain… but there was no pain.

Only a 'knowing'… An 'enlightenment'... A _connection_…

He and The Doctor were the same…

Everything was the 'same'…

All was love

All of the universe was _One_…

All of creation was connected with a divine, positive energy that, for that blissfully clear moment, Martin was not only able to know… He was able to experience.

He could feel his soul for the first time… And it was _beautiful_.

And he knew God was with him.

'Yes'

Another wave of the blissful energy swept over him as if re-affirming God's presence.

The only sensation he could feel was Love.

There was no fear… No hate… No judgement.

Just unconditional, all embracing love

'Yes'

Again the divine pulse surged through Martin's body and the man found himself laughing joyously as tears of unsuppressed relief rolled down his face. It felt like God was stroking the man's soul gently… Letting him know just where it was…

"Thank… you" He managed to whisper "Thank you…"

Again the pulse of blissful energy swept over him as Martin let out soft moans between tears of grateful laughter. He looked over at The Doctor who was now stood by the deck chairs smiling contently at him.

"And… thank you" Martin gasped at The Doctor who just nodded knowingly, smiling like a Cheshire cat.

Another pulse of slightly less intensity caressed Martin's centre as he leaned forward, propping himself up on his hands. He realised the sensation… the experience… the _communion_ was slowly coming to an end.

"Thank you…" He gasped again "Thank you for… showing me… for touching me… for been there"

Another, softer throb of love kissed Martin's soul and the man fell softly onto his back, wiping tears from his face as he did so. He laid there on the ground in comparative silence, slowly reducing his breathing rate as the illuminating glow gradually faded from within him.

After a few minutes he broke the silence loudly…

"Yes!" Martin almost shouted, "That's what… What I wanted! That's what I've waited for all these years! Just to know… To experience… That there's 'something else'! A 'Higher Dimension'! And there is!" His grin was almost hurting his cheeks.

He looked over at The Doctor who was still stood calmly a few feet away smiling happily at the man's epiphany.

"I don't even have to ask what happened! I know what that was! God… The Universe… touched me!" Martin threw his hands out to his sides, "And there was nothing bad in it! Nothing fearful or vengeful! Nothing jealous or demanding! Just love… Beautiful blissful love!" Martin's punched his fist into the air with joy and let out a cry that was somewhere between a laugh and a shout. "Yes! Yes! YES!"

The Doctor walked over to him slowly and looked down at the man with a contented grin.

"I told you I was good, didn't I?" He beamed "It's not every day some one experiences something like that! Well done, Marty! Oh… I'm _very_ proud!" His grin was bigger now than Martin had ever seen it. He held out a hand to help Martin up. The jubilant man took it and sprang up energetically.

As soon as he was on his feet he embraced The Doctor with a hug of almost bear like proportions. The Doctor returned the embrace and patted Martin on the back affectionately.

"Brilliant!" The Doctor's smile was bigger than ever "I love it when a plan comes together!"

Both men laughed heartily and then began, whilst still embracing each other tightly, to jump up and down like children. Their laughter echoed around the valley, which was soon also full of the sound of song. First came just noises to dance and jump too and then the two men burst spontaneously into a verse of 'Love is all around' before bursting into a huge fit of laughter, which was mainly brought on by their own tackiness.

Unknowingly to the child like pair, a few hundred yards away a man with light brown skin watched them joyously. The beauty of his smile was only matched by his own laughter, which he let out without reservation.

The man watched Martin and The Doctor for a few more moments before he turned, smiling gratefully at the sight he'd just witnessed and sat down on a rock behind him. He didn't intend on going anywhere...

"The Kingdom of God is within you" – Jesus of Nazareth


	12. Chapter 12

**TWELVE**

'What we are today comes from our thoughts of yesterday, and our present thoughts build our life of tomorrow: Our life is the creation of our mind'

- The Buddha

Martin sipped his coffee slowly and stared out at the expanse in front of him. The Sun was starting to go down now and its majestic beauty radiated through the landscape with every colour of the rainbow.

The ancient city below him looked solemn yet peaceful with the dwelling's walls a cascade of browns and creams. Mixed with the bright golds and reds shining from the taller buildings, the city almost shone with calm reflection.

On closer inspection Martin could see a hive of activity as tiny silhouettes rushed around to get the last chores of the day done before the darkness came. Animals crazed contently, exotic birds flew in the twilight sky and children played and laughed in the golden green fields surrounding the city. Parents shouted their children's names, calling them home to the warmth of family.

The sound of bells, song and chants could be heard emanating from the tallest buildings in the city: The places of worship. Inside faithful believers were giving praise to their 'One True God'. Their hypnotic tones rose out of the city and seemed to mingle with the dust and smoke, creating an elaborate dance as they made their way to the heavens…

Martin shook his head slowly

How could he be seeing all this? Why was he still here? If all of the events that had happened over the last few hours were just a figment of his 'imagination'… then why was he still 'imaging' he was in 29AD and sat staring out over ancient Nazareth? Why had the Doctor not taken him home?

Why hadn't he woken up yet?

He would ask The Doctor but he wasn't there. Shortly after Martin's 'experience' The Doctor had returned to his TARDIS muttering something about 'stabilizing the ships Elysian nodes'.

"You just sit down, Marty. Have a coffee and get your breath back," He had said comfortingly. "You've had a busy day. It's not like everyday you get to see your worst fears realised as a terrifying reality and _then_ get touched by God before you can say 'Whoops... there go my trousers!'… You'll need at least a coffee and a good ten minutes to get your head back in shape"

The Doctor had grinned one of his usual grins and then stepped in the TARDIS whistling the 'Star Wars' theme as he did so before vanishing quickly inside the dark.

Martin had sat alone in one of the deckchairs now for what seemed like about twenty minutes. He'd found a steaming hot sweet coffee and a chocolate hob-nob on a plate outside of the TARDIS' doors. The Doctor must have put them there but he had said nothing and made no sound at all when leaving them.

The coffee was the best Martin had ever tasted. It felt rich and invigorating running down his tired throat. It had certainly picked him up and his mind was now racing faster than ever as he took in the events of the last few hours.

_And_ he had started to remember his own memories again too:

The hours he spent as a child locked away in his bedroom, his eyes full of monsters and aliens as he devoured comic after comic. That sense of escapism… He loved it.

The nights he sat transfixed to the television screen travelling with time defying heroes and Jedi knights. How the Universe had seemed so vast… and so full of 'evil' aliens that wanted to control through fear and order and lots and lots of death.

And then, as he got older, his own fascination with the idea that maybe, just maybe, the 'gods' of ancient religions were really aliens. I mean, that all made sense right?

As he approach 28 his own spiritual awakening had begun. A deep inner longing for 'something more' ate away at him. The quest for a personal, spiritual God had begun.

He'd found little comfort in his Nan's religion. Which, if he was been honest, he'd never really understood. He'd always sort of 'played along' with it, more for his Nan than anybody.

He'd read a few 'New Age' books and mostly liked what he read. But the slightly 'wishy-washy' philosophy and 'love everybody' mentality had rarely rang true alongside the harshness of reality and the human experience.

And the angry, punishing God he learnt of through his doorstep encounters with Jehovah's Witnesses was too much like one of the aliens in his childhood books and movies: All terrifying and vengeful. This God seemed to promise a physical, resurrected Heaven through order and discipline. A tyrannical, dictator-like deity that demanded blind faith at all times and to question was to be put to death.

Truly a 'God of fear'.

But his own understanding of 'God' in the 'spiritual' sense was 'Love'. His Nan had always echoed Aunty Mary's simple truth: 'God is Love'. A Truth that seemed to be echoed also in every religion and every spiritual path, or at least, according to what Martin had always been told...

'God is Love'

And now Martin had experienced that. In a truth that went to the very core of Who He Was.

He had experienced love… A blissful connection with an energy that seemed to bind every living thing. A sense of realisation of an existence beyond this reality. A touch of the divine in an awakening of the soul…

A gift from… 'God'

But what did it all mean?

If all he had seen before his 'experience' were nothing more than his own thoughts made manifest, then what does that actually _mean_? That the events he witnessed around Mount Sinai didn't really happen? Or that they did but not the way that he saw it? That he wasn't really _there_ now but just inside his own imagination? And if he _was_ inside his own imagination, then where _was_ he? Where was his _body_? Was he... dead?

Martin shook his head at this thought and banished it to the back of his mind.

And who was The Doctor in all this? The Doctor had said that he and Martin had 'made a deal' before they had _met_. Suggesting that Martin had agreed to 'lose his memory' so that he could have this whole experience. But Martin still couldn't remember that part yet even though other parts of his True memory were falling back into place like melting glaciers returning to the warmth of the sea.

And what about the _spiritual_ experience? That had happened through The Doctor. Martin had made the connection to that blissful energy via The Doctor's eyes. The Doctor was the catalyst in this whole thing.

Who was he?

_What_ was he?

He'd basically lied to Martin all this time, hadn't he? He had told him he would show him 'The Truth' but all he'd shown him so far was Martin's own imaginings in terrifying 3D reality.

'All he'd shown him so far…'

Martin looked over at the mound of soft grass where The Doctor had placed his latest 'book'. It was lying there facing upwards; it's soft red cover reflecting the dying sun, creating every shade of red imaginable. The writing on the front was elegant yet bold: 'The Book of Life'

What was all thatgoing to be about? More lies? Or Truth at last?

Martin suddenly felt the urge to go over and pick up the book and look to see what was really inside it. But what if it filled him with fear again like the last time he'd done that? Did he really want to risk that again? Now that he had experienced love he didn't want fear to play any part in what was coming next. He didn't want to open the book on his own. He needed someone with him...

He needed The Doctor.

'The Doctor would know… _does_ know what to do'. Despite the fact that The Doctor had taken him on such a fearful journey, he still trusted him. He still knew that The Doctor was _really _there to help him and had literally been a 'spirit guide' to him through this whole experience. He had felt no malice from him at any time and, deep inside, he knew that The Doctor was there to teach him… at last… The Truth.

But who was he? _What_ was he?

"Missed me?" The Doctor's voice suddenly whispered in Martin's left ear.

Martin spun around sharply and gazed up at the Doctor's beaming face. He was now wearing a bright white casual shirt with short sleeves yet his stripy trousers were still tight to his legs.

"Doctor… Do you have to creep up like that?" Martin said, half laughing and half genuinely annoyed.

"Sorry, Marty, Sorry… I'm just pleased for you, that's all" The Doctor winked at Martin smiling happily. "All these years of planning and scheming just so that we could get to this point"

"What 'point' is that, Doctor?" Martin looked directly into The Doctor eyes.

The Doctor leaned forward so his face was inches away from Martin's. He stared into the man's bloodshot eyes smiling warmly and nodding happily. When he spoke his voice was rich and excitable...

"This point now… Right here… Where you finally discover the Truth of your very being… The moment of your greatest awakening… The Truth you've been looking for all of your life…"

He patted Martin on the shoulder and spun around sharply, marched over to the book, picked it up slowly and clutched it tight to his chest. His smile was the best 'Cat that got the cream' smile Martin had ever seen.

The Doctor grabbed the deck chair next to Martin and spun it around so it was now in front and opposite to Martin's own chair. He sat down heavily breathing out a long appreciative breath as he did so, his back facing the ancient city below.

"Ahhh… I love a good book." He tapped the red cover gently, "And this is a _great_ book… A _brilliant_ book…. One of the best, actually. Well, _the _best if we're been honest and…"

"Doctor…" Martin interrupted. "I've got a million questions I really need to ask you… A _billion_, really… Can I just…"

"Ah, ah, ah…" The Doctor held up the palm of his hand, "I understand your frustration, Marty, I really do. But let's not go too fast shall we? You need to take a deep breath and forget everything you thought you knew. All your questions will be answered eventually. Please trust me on this… I wouldn't take you on this journey and then leave you hanging. I promise you will _know_ soon, ok?"

He smiled a gentle reassuring smile at Martin who then returned the smile nodding slowly. "I do trust you, Doctor…" Martin leaned forward slightly a tear was welling in the corner of his right eye. "…I trust you with my life"

The Doctor seemed genuinely taken aback. "Blimey" he said, "I must have done something right then! I'd best not let you down now, had I?" He reached out to shake Martin's hand who then took it gratefully and shook it firmly. Both men smiled warmly at each other. The Doctor sat back down in his seat. "Nice hand shake you've got there, Marty. You can always tell a man from his handshake…" He breathed out "Right then. Shall we have a look at this book? Shall we see what wonders are inside? Because if it's answers you want this book is full of them. Brimming with them, in fact…"

The Doctor leant forward on the book looking more like a presenter from Jacknory than a time traveller come spirit guide. He kept smiling calmly at Martin whilst taping the book gently with the palm of his hand.

"All that you have experienced so far has been a journey into the _mind_. A putting together of clues that _you _found through years and years of reading or watching sci-fi and letting it expand your mind... And that's good. There's nothing wrong with a bit of mind expansion, Marty." The Doctor lean forward slightly. "But you were never going to find God in your mind. To find God you have to be _out_ if your mind."

The Doctor gave Martin a reassuring grin. It was as if, Martin thought, that he didn't have to be told that The Doctor was 'out of his mind'. His voice was hypnotically smooth and mingled with the hymns been sung solemnly in the city below.

"So the next part of our journey is an _inner_ journey. This is a journey into the heart... into the _soul_. And in this journey we will find out Who You Really Are... And Who... and _what_... 'God' is..." The Doctor sat back slowly and raised his left eyebrow. His voice was suddenly back to it's light and breezy tone. "There... have I built it up enough yet?" He said grinning heartily again.

Martin let out a laugh which was followed by a cough and a generally nodding of the head. He then lent back in his seat trying to look comfortable and at 'home'. The sun was setting behind The Doctor now but it was still humid and the slow, rhythmical chants coming from the city below created a perfect soundtrack to the moment.

"I'm ready when you are, Doctor" Martin said confidently.

"Oh, are you sure you are?" The Doctor sounded almost disappointed. He then winked at Martin and the grin returned to his face. "Yeah, I know you're ready. I just wanted to pause for dramatic effect"

He cleared his throat, sat upright with the book on his knees and held the top of each of each corner between his thumb and forefinger and then opened the book slowly. Pure white light streamed from the pages lighting up The Doctor's grinning expression as he winked knowingly at Martin. He then looked down at the book and blinked annoyingly.

"I'll just turn the glare down a bit…" The Doctor said rubbing his hand up and down the back of the book and squinting as he did so. "I wont be able to see a thing with all that light in my eyes" The glare from the book dimmed slowly until it seemed to have disappeared entirely. "It was a bit dramatic that, wasn't it? A bit OTT…"

The Doctor smiled contently again and looked down into the book. One eyebrow raised sharply as if was surprised by what he saw. He then looked up at Martin questioningly.

"Are you ready?"

Martin nodded gently.

"Then I'll begin…."

'However many holy words you read, however many you speak,

what good will they do you if you do not act upon them?'

- The Dhammapapa


	13. Chapter 13

**THIRTEEN**

'God became as we are, that we may be as he is.

God is man and exists in us and we in him'

– William Blake

"Who Are You?"

The Doctor looked inquisitively at Martin. "Are you made just of flesh and bone? Are you nothing more than the sum of your memories and experiences? Are you just a brain living inside a body and that is all?" He leaned forward slightly and looked directly into Martin's eyes "Do you believe in the existence of the soul?"

Martin looked puzzled. The Doctor wasn't even looking in the book.

"I thought this was going to be a book of answers, Doctor... not more questions" He pushed himself further back into his chair. "Of course I believe in the existence of the soul after what I've just been through!"

The Doctor looked pleased. "So, for you at least, the existence of the soul is not in doubt... So the question becomes... What is the soul?" The Doctor stared up above his head watching the first stars peaking through the darkened blue sky. "Is the soul something God judges and punishes as he sees fit as some religions would have you believe? Is it something separate from God and therefore somehow unworthy and tainted? Do you think you should fear for your immortal soul if you come to God through the 'wrong' religious path? Should you spend your whole life trying to make sure you are in the 'right' religion for fear of eternal punishment? Do you really think that is what God wants?"

Martin sighed. Hadn't they already had this discussion? "I don't know what God wants... No one does. And I'm not hearing that many answers, Doctor... You haven't even read a word in that book yet!"

The Doctor frowned deeply "Ohhh... Talk about been impatient! We cant just jump right in, you know!" He seemed genuinely hurt and nodded once in Martin's direction. "Blimey, you must be crap in bed" He added still frowning.

"Yeah, cheers, Doctor... Can we just get on with the book?" Martin fidgeted slightly in his seat.

The Doctor glanced down in the book for a few seconds and then looked up, his head tilted on an angle.

"A great illusion about God is that He... and its usually always a 'He'... wants something. Yet what would 'God'... The Universe itself... want?"

Martin shook his head gently. "I've really no idea" he said breathing out as he did so.

"I tell you in a minute..." The Doctor winked "You'll be surprised" He looked down in the book but still didn't look like he was reading it. "It is also a great illusion that God is separate from you and all of Mankind... and all of creation for that matter. As if God is somehow aloof and distant... Always just out of reach... Somewhere... 'out there'..." He craned his neck upwards. "Always _out _there... And never _in_ here" He pointed to the center of his chest and looked back at Martin. "Yet if I were to tell you that the soul is actually a _part_ of God, would you believe me?"

Martin scrunched his mouth up and picked at one of his fingernails slowly. "Well, if you would have asked me before today I would have said 'no'... But I'd believe you now. I felt my soul exploded back there... And I'm not going to forget that in a hurry."

The Doctor smiled knowingly at Martin. "So if your soul is a _part_ of God that would mean that God is never _apart_ from you. That would mean that every living thing was actually a part of God. So that would also mean that all of the Universe was actually One thing... One interconnected whole... Connected by love... Which, as we've already discovered, is what 'God' is"

Martin leaned forward in his chair ringing his hands together slowly

"Yes... that's what I _felt_... but what does that _mean_?"

The Doctor's face was suddenly very calm and his voice light in pitch.

"It means that God is inside of each of us. The soul is an aspect of God... a reflection of divinity in human form. It's how the universe knows itself as an experience..." He drummed his hands gently on the pages of the book "If all of the universe is actually one thing and that thing is 'God' then I'm telling you that 'God' is the energy of life... in fact, 'God' is life itself"

Martin thought back to the conversation he'd had with The Doctor when they first met.

"God is another word for 'life'... and for 'love'" Martin said. He was slowly starting to follow what the Doctor was saying.

The Doctor nodded pointing a finger in Martin's direction "There you go..."

The Doctor breathed in sharply and scratched the back of his neck.

"...Now not all people believe in 'God'... but all people every where believe in 'life'. For they are life itself... been experienced. And most people have experienced love at some point in their life and, in those moments, have become acutely aware of the existence of their soul" He rested his elbows on the book "In moments of love and joy humans experience their remembrance of God... And of the higher part of themselves. They see love reflected in the eyes of another soul and for a blissfully clear moment... They see 'God'...They have an 'At-One-Ment'... Sometimes called an atonement" He shifted his legs around and shrugged his shoulders. "But, the trouble is, there's a whole stigma about the word 'God' within the human experience. For many 'God' is the ultimate conversation killer because... Well, talk about baggage! Ohhhh... The arguments it starts! There's so many different ideas and theologies based around God that you could be confused or bored to death within the first twenty seconds of any decent debate!" He held his hands up in mock surprise "That's why a lot of people 'switch off' as soon as they here the 'god' word... It's become a 'tainted' sound to use... Almost like a dirty word..."

Martin interceded "Well, I think that has a lot to do with the religions of the world, Doctor. I think many 'ordinary' people in 'my day' who maybe aren't religious see the contradiction in religions. Not to mention the killing been done in the name of God that's still going on in my day... in this time... and in the 'imagined' future I saw..._And _in every age since year dot"

The Doctor nodded once more. "Humans have killed each other since the dawn of time because they disagree about What God Wants. They believe that 'their' religion is the 'One True Faith' and has all the answers. They believe they already know what God wants and are prepared to kill and die for it. They believe they have nothing left to learn about 'God' and 'life' because their religion already has all the answers" His face looked sad and mournful "So they shut themselves off from the possibility of 'New revelations' and 'New Understandings' about 'God'... In fact, they _have_ to in order to survive... And, while mankind has evolved in sciences, technologies and psychologies, in the area of religious belief mankind has remained stagnant. Religion has not been allowed to evolve... And evolution is the purpose of all life"

The Doctor paused as if contemplating what could be. After a moment he continued...

"Of course all the different ideas about what god actually wants completely contradict each other. But religions look past this as they think it's everyone else that's 'wrong' and them that is 'right'. This 'righteousness' is their undoing..." He stared off vacantly as if distracted slightly. He shook his head sharply and returned his gaze to Martin. "But do you want to know a real secret here? Do you want to know the ironic Truth in all of this?" He looked inquisitively at Martin. "I'll tell you want God _really _wants..."

The Doctor then remained perfectly still and silent. His face was calm and relaxed. He sat almost statue like with his hands placed either side of the book and his gaze distant yet transfixed on Martin and remained completely silent...

"Yeah... What is it? What _does_ God want?" Martin had waited long enough.

The Doctor waited a few more seconds and then drew a line with one hand cutting it through the air slowly.

"That's it... Nothing... Zilch...Zero... Didderly squat... Sweet FA... God doesn't want anything. What could God want? God is everything... The Alpha & Omega... The Beginning and the End... God is life itself remember? God wants nothing... Other than to experience itself as a reality and this She does through us... and every living being in the universe"

Martin was taken aback "God is a woman?"

The Doctor laughed gently "No, of course not... But He's not a man, either, is She? If God is life... The Universe... Pure energy... How could it have gender?"

Martin didn't have an answer to that. "But most religions talk about God been a 'He', don't they?"

"Yeah, and who do you think wrote the holy books? Men!" The Doctor laughed again and then became more serious. "And the women in your societies have been paying the price for that for a _long_ time!" The Doctor cleared his throat and lowered his voice slightly. "The Truth is that no one religion has 'The One True Faith'. Do people imagine a 'god' that would let an earnest seeker of Truth face eternal damnation because they got into the 'wrong' religion? Can you imagine a 'god' more cruel than that?" His eyebrows were raised once more as he stuck out his jaw line and placed his elbows back on the book. "The Truth is there is no 'eternal damnation' as some of your fear based theologies would have you believe. For who would God punish if all of life is One? And how would God measure the 'goodness' of one against the 'evilness' of the other? What is 'good' and 'evil' anyway? Surely every one and everything is a combination of both?" The Doctor paused again and took in a lungful of the fresh, clean air. "Would a mass murderer be forgiven on his death bed if he prayed in the 'right' way to the 'right' God? Would a Buddhist who had spent his life working to better the lives of others be sent screaming into hell because he was worshipping the 'wrong' God? Or what of the two-year-old boy who dies of cancer and who's parents are devout atheists? Because the boy was never ordained into the 'right' religion... what ever _that_ is... Does that mean his soul than cast into infinite torture or cast into some non-descript 'limbo'? Do you really believe that a 'God of love' would have the nature of the after life set up in such a way?"

Martin shook his head "No... I cant believe that a God that is Love would do that"

"Good..." The Doctor put a hand through his hair and relaxed his posture "Yet these are the questions that mankind must ask itself before it assigns the role of a jealous, condemning judge to an 'All Loving God'..."

A thought struck Martin "Are you saying that there's no judgment?... At all?... For anyone?"

The Doctor nodded calmly "There's no judgment in the way your fear based theologies have described. All souls return to Heaven... The realm of the Absolute... for that is where they came from... and where all return"

Martin was puzzled again "The realm of the absolute?"

The Doctor's voice suddenly became light again "Yeah...That's where God is. We're in the realm of the Relative right here. We're experiencing everything that God is not..." He said matter-of-factly.

"You've totally lost me, Doctor..." Martin sank back down in his chair.

"I can see we'll have to start at the beginning. I'll explain to you... In fact, I'll _read_ to you... how creation really happened... Oh, you're gonna love this..." He started pointing down at the book.

"Well, I hope so" Martin crossed his feet and got comfortable again in his chair. "Because you haven't read word from that book yet!"

"Well" He drew that word out again, "I've already read it, Marty... I was sort of giving you an overview" He looked over at Martin's slightly concerned face. "But don't worry, I'll read it to you now, ok?"

Martin nodded as a sense of 'deja vu' swept over him. The Doctor put the tip of his finger inside the book...

"Right then..." He cleared his throat, "From the start then..."

The Doctor began to read out loud:

In the beginning all there was, was 'love'... and there was nothing else.

Love was all that existed and all that could be. This 'Energy'... this 'One' primal force... was the first fragment of existence.

Yet for 'love' to know itself as something that could be 'experienced' they had to be something that 'love' was not.

So in a blissfully Eternal Moment 'Love' exploded with joy and created all that was _not_ love... For 'love' knew that every opposite must exist if 'love' (which some of you call 'God') was to know itself as something that could be 'experienced'.

This was the greatest gift 'love' every gave itself

In the Eternal Moment of Now 'God/Love' created relativity... The possibility that 'this' and 'that' could exist. 'Here' and 'there' became a reality as the Universe itself literally exploded into being and the realm of the 'relative' was created.

The Doctor paused and looked up at Martin.

"Are you enjoying it so far?" He said smiling gently.

"Yes... Yes I am. I'm actually starting to follow what you are saying... It's all slowly starting to make sense. Please don't stop now... Carry on... Carry on..." Martin waved his hand at The Doctor in an effort to speed the process up.

The Doctor grinned warmly at Martin and returned his gaze to the book:

Suddenly 'time' was created, for a thing was first 'here' and then it was 'there' and the period it took to get from 'here' to 'there' was measurable.

In rendering the Universe as a divided version of itself, 'Love/God' produced, from pure energy, all that now exists... Both seen and unseen.

So not only was the physical Universe created, but the metaphysical Universe as well.

Pure Love exploded into an infinite number of units smaller than the whole.

These energy units you would call spirits or souls.

There is only one way for the Creator to know itself experientially as the Creator... And that is to create. And so 'Love/God' gave to each of the countless parts of itself the same power to create.

The Doctor paused again. "That's why some of your religions say you were created in 'The image and likeness of God'. It doesn't mean physically, of course, it means you are a creative being... You have within the power to create your own life. And this you all do... whether you are conscious of it or not"

The Doctor looked at Martin's confused face.

"But we're rushing ahead there aren't we?" The Doctor added hurriedly.

Martin said nothing. He just pointed at the book.

The Doctor got the hint and carried on reading:

But for all the countless souls to know themselves as the pure creative spirit they are... First they had to forget.

On entering the physical realm... The realm of the relative... Each soul relinquished it's remembrance of itself.

This allows each soul to experience itself as being at total choice.

It is in the remembering of 'God/Love' in which the soul delights.

You are, have always been, and always will be, a divine part of the divine whole.

Your 'job' in the physical body, therefore, is not to learn (because you already know), but to _remember_ Who You Really Are.

And to remember Who Everyone Else Is. And then to remind others, so that they can remember also.

This has been the 'job' of every Spiritual Master who has ever lived in the Realm of the Relative.

It is their sole purpose... Their _soul_ purpose...

The Doctor stopped reading once more. He looked at Martin who was sat almost mesmerized by The Doctor's words.

"How's it going, Marty" The Doctor asked quietly.

Martin raised his eyebrows "I'm fine, Doctor... I'm loving it actually... It sort of makes sense... Although it opens even more questions really... Does that mean..."

"Ah ah ah" The Doctor raised his hand, "You can't expect every question to be answered within a heartbeat, Marty. We'll get there... But first I have something really important to do" The Doctor stood up and placed the book down on his chair.

"Where are you going, Doctor?" Martin asked perplexed.

"Well, I really need another coffee... and a hobnob!" He said slowly making his way towards the TARDIS doors. "Plus, it's starting to get a bit nippy... I need my jacket... And..." He looked almost embarrassed "I really need a pee! I wont be a minute... Then we'll crack on with the answer to life, the universe and everything!"

Martin mumbled 'It's 42, isn't it?' as The Doctor disappeared inside the TARDIS. Martin sank back in his chair, the words from the book swirling around his head...

Not far away from where Martin was sat a man with light brown skin watched with interest. He'd sat calmly listening to The Doctor's words and thought about interrupting at one point but then thought he'd see how the whole thing played out. He took some bread from inside his long garments and divided in two. He popped a piece in his mouth and sat back on a large rock. He'd speak up soon but, in the meantime, he'd just listen and observe...

'You are given the gift of the gods;

You create your reality according to your beliefs.

Yours is the creative energy that makes your world.

There are no limitations to the self

Except those you believe in' -

'The Nature of Personal Reality', Jane Roberts


	14. Chapter 14

**FOURTEEN**

'Dear God,

When will it be the end of the world? I know it is going to happen, so I want to know when it is so I can get ready. I'd like to have enough time to say goodbye to everyone. Are you going to make another world afterwards or are we just going to all go to heaven forever? Yours, Henry (age 8)' -

'Dear God - Children's letters to God', Carmel Reilly

"Aaahhhh… That's better!"

The Doctor sat down heavily into his seat, munching on a chocolate hob-knob whilst holding on to a hot coffee precariously between his thumb and forefinger. He was wearing his big, brown coat again but he had changed out of his brown pin striped suite and was now wearing a dark blue version. He had even adjusted and gelled his hair into the perfectly messy shape it was in when the two men had first met.

"How's it going, Marty?" The Doctor half grinned in Martin's direction.

"Yeah, I'm cool, Doctor… Though you didn't have to bother for me" Martin said indicating The Doctor's refreshed look.

"Oh, I like to make an effort, you know…" He looked over at Martin's slightly dour appearance… "Unlike some people" He added quietly.

Martin was slightly taken aback "Oh cheers, Doctor…" He said sarcastically, "I have been through quite a bit over the last few hours, you know…" He looked down at his own clothes "_And_… I have just been to a funeral!" He tugged at the lapel on his own grey coat and gave The Doctor his best 'in case you haven't noticed' type look.

"Yeah, sorry, Marty" The Doctor seemed genuinely scolded and closed his eyes and scrunched his face up as if ashamed at himself. "I get into heavy sarcasm mode sometimes and I just can't shut myself up! Do forgive me… It can make me a right loud mouthed idiot on occasion, especially in this incarnation but…" He opened one eye and looked over at Martin's slightly red face "I wasn't really talking about your clothes" He nodded up at the top of Martin's head at his balding and dishevelled hair.

Martin gasped and put his right hand instinctively towards his head, his face shocked and contorted.

At this sight The Doctor let out a loud laugh, sat forward suddenly and then pushed himself back in his seat kicking his legs out like a child as he convulsed in laughter at his own private joke.

Martin was frowning intently at The Doctor's strange behaviour. "What's wrong with you?" Martin shook his head and let out a little half laugh followed by a couple of sniggers. The Doctor continued to laugh almost uncontrollably, pointing at Martin's confused yet becoming amused face. "What?…" Martin was starting to laugh along. The Doctor continued to squirm and twist and his laughter was the definition of infectious. "What… is… it?" Martin could hardly speak now for his own laughter, which was making The Doctor even worse.

"Your face…" The Doctor managed to get out between gasps for breath. He pointed at Martin who was smiling and nodding happily, his face beseeching The Doctor for the punch line for whatever it was they were laughing at. The Doctor composed himself slightly and nodded cheerfully in Martin's direction "…Your face… You looked so hurt… You looked like one of those little Exalian Slime Monkeys."

Martin's jaw dropped in disbelief, his face returning to the same shocked expression.

"Ha.." The Doctor pointed directly at his face, "There you go again" He literally slapped his own leg as if witnessing comedy genius.

Martin shook his head and returned his features to 'normal'. He was laughing but slightly bewildered.

"I don't even know what an 'Exflavian Slime Monkey' is… or even _looks _like…" He began.

"_Exalian_' not 'Exflavian'… And yes, you do…" The Doctor just couldn't shut himself up "It's one of those tiny little ugly things… scrunched up nose… constantly surprised expression on their poor little, squashed faces…"

"Yeah, cheers, Doctor…" Martin stared stony faced and wide eyed "You're really helping 'bathe in the positive and love' now, aren't you?" He added sarcastically. "Talk about 'building me up to knock me down'!"

"Oh, I'm only joking with you, Marty" The Doctor relaxed back into his seat and took a sip of coffee before throwing a whole chocolate hob-knob into his mouth. "Get rid of your ego…" He said between crunches "… There's just no room for egos round here"

Before Martin could comment that The Doctor was perhaps one of _the_ most egotistical people he himself had ever met, the time traveller had picked up 'The Book Of Life' and was stroking it affectionately with his left hand. He winked at Martin and the two men simply smiled at each other.

"Shall we crack on with this then?" The Doctor held his head back slightly as he gazed inquisitively at Martin.

"Yeah… But can I ask you a question first?" Martin lent forward in his chair. "Where did you get that book? And how do I know that what you're telling me is True? I mean… How do I know it's 'Absolute truth'? Am I supposed to believe that _that_ book is 'True' and every other 'holy' book is 'wrong'?"

The Doctor nodded slowly at Martin. "Good question, Marty… Never take anybody's word for it." He looked down at the un-opened book and tapped the cover gently. He leaned forward slightly and half smiled. "You believe what ever you want to believe… If something in this book feels 'right' to you then listen to your feelings because…" He opened the book and pointed at the first page he came to…

Feelings are the language of the soul

He raised his head from the book, sniffed and carried on. "Your soul already knows all of this" he tapped the book cover. "And what we are doing here is getting to the Truth of your soul… The Truth that's already inside you. Your soul speaks to you with feelings. So whatever is said in this or any other book you don't have to believe it's The Truth. All you have to do is look to how you are feeling about it. If something feels 'right' to you at the soul level you will feel it in the very centre of your being. Your own inner voice will tell you the rest…"

He smiled warmly and then dropped his mouth down at both sides. He leaned forward slightly in his chair and then rolled his head back once in a clockwise motion.

"Now if it doesn't feel right to you or you just don't agree with it then that's fine too. There's no YOU MUST OBEY EVERY SINGLE WORD IN HERE clause on this particular 'Holy' book" He looked down the spine of the book as if checking one more time. He shook his head convinced "And that's all the better for it…Because this is about true freedom and total choice. Which, in essence, is what the soul really is…" He looked pleased with himself and then shook his head as if to break himself from his own trance. "But let's not rush on. We can't run before we can walk, can we?" He leaned back in his chair and looked down at the book. "You asked where I got this particular edition" He stroked the cover fondly. "Well…" he sniggered to himself slightly, "That's a story in itself: Giant Kevflapods, a donkey called Dave and a pizza the size of Wembley stadium!"

Martin let out a laugh and nestled further back in his chair. He thought it was best just letting The Doctor rattle on.

"Actually, I think someone did write a story about it at one point" The Time Lord looked genuinely puzzled as if trying to recover a long faded memory. "Terrance… somebody… People were always writing down my adventures. There was a time when I couldn't do a thing without it somebody turning into a six part series or even an audio play! But that was a long time ago, mind you… No one remembers me now, do they?" He looked inquiringly at Martin.

Martin was puzzled at the question but before he could answer The Doctor stood up and walked slowly around his own chair holding 'The Book of Life' close to his chest.

"I got this book from the Ancients… The most highly evolved beings in the Universe… The races that have over come petty squabbles within their own cultures and learnt to live together in peace… Highly evolved beings that have learnt that all the illusions in life are just that… 'Illusions'… And have evolved enough spiritually to understand their true relationship to 'God' and the Universe itself… They've seen 'what works' and would never dream about doing anything that was not beneficial to their collective whole" The Doctor smiled reassuringly at Martin. "They have literally learned… Or, more appropriately 'remembered'… to 'Live as One'"

"They've seen what works? What does that mean?" Martin was frowning whilst sitting back slowly in his chair.

"It means they've seen, for example, that wars don't work… That killing each other in the name of 'God' doesn't work…That suppressing deprived masses whilst corrupt leaders living in luxury doesn't work… That is, of course, if what you are saying you are wanting as a collective species is a peaceful and harmonious world" The Doctor craned his head upwards and looked out into the vast night sky. Stars were starting to appear through the twilight as the universe itself began to make an appearance. "The ancients have observed what works and have, over millennia, created peace loving societies that are based on the principles of One-ness and love. Each soul is giving equal opportunity to express itself and this means a way of sharing all resources with all people that would be incomprehensible to your world right now. Highly evolved beings allow no soul to ever go without. Such is there compassion and love and sure knowledge that they are all one"

He looked back at Martin who was sat staring out into the night sky too. The sky was a deep, dark blue and stars flickered majestically as they had done for billions of years. Martin focused in on a cluster of stars and wondered if the 'Highly evolved beings' were on a planet around one of those suns right now living a life of blissful peace. He tried to imagine how such civilisations could exist and what such a world would look like.

The Doctor was still talking. "You see… and don't take this as a judgement because it's not… but the human race as a species are relatively toddlers on the 'highly evolved' ladder… Both spiritually and physically… In fact, you're barely out of nursery school to be honest." The Doctor bent down and picked up his coffee from beside his chair. "Allowing 50,000 people to die a day from hunger while the rest of the world throw away enough food to feed the every hunger mouth on the planet twice over is not the action of a highly evolved society. Creating weapons that can wipe out all of life one hundred times over and then putting them in the hands of an 'infant' race is not what a highly evolved society would do either." He pointed up at the stars. "There's been many worlds out there that got to this point right now… And when I say right now I mean right now in your time ok… Not 29AD Nazareth … Let's forget where we are for a moment… And these other worlds…they bottled it… Ka boom… Blew each other up… Fighting about 'belief' and who was 'right'…Stupid really… But there you go."

"What are you talking about, Doctor?" Martin had heard enough of The Doctor's ranting. "You're scaring me now."

The Doctor paused and relaxed his expression. "I'm sorry, Marty. But you asked about highly evolved beings and I'm just saying that such a society is possible… It's achievable. It's meant to be helpful… and hopeful. It can be done. That's all I'm saying. It's just a question of intention." He looked suddenly at Martin, his face inquisitive and commanding. "Is that what _you _want for mankind, Marty? Would _you_ like to live in a world where mankind had evolved so much spiritually that every_ soul _could live in peace and prosperity? A fair world where every single being on the planet had enough food in their belly and love in their hearts? A world where True spirituality was about more peace, healing and love, rather than obedience, suppression and judgement? "

The Doctor stood perfectly still and stared deeply into Martin's eyes. Framed as it was against the setting sun, The Doctor's figure was almost cast in shadow as tiny particles of dust danced around him moving in time with the faint coral hymns been sung in the distance.

Martin stared back at him for a few seconds before turning his gaze away from The Doctor's penetrating look.

"Yeah, of course I would…" Martin shook his head his gaze still aimed at his shoes. "I'm sure a lot of people would love to live in a peaceful world but…" He looked up at The Doctor and met his gaze head on…"It'll never happen" He added quietly.

The Doctor suddenly froze and looked very sad, almost shocked. Without looking he sat down slowly in to his deck chair a look of continued disillusionment on his face. He bowed his head and sat hunched over, resting his elbows on the cover of the book.

He sat in silence for a few seconds picking at a loose golden thread from the book cover.

"Then it won't happen," He whispered gently.

He let out a defeated sigh and looked up dejectedly at Martin. He face was grey and looked genuinely hurt as he looked slowly down at his book, opened it and softly read the first line that he saw.

"Your thought creates your reality"

He looked over at Martin with such a look of disappointment Martin found it hard to meet his gaze "Have you given up so easily? Don't you think that mankind is capable of rising to a higher awareness?"

"Ermmm…" Martin was literally stuck for words. "Well, I'd like to believe it but there are so many problems in the world. Too much pain and brutality that just saying, "Oh don't worry, let's just all love each other" isn't really going to work. But, yeah, I would love to think that we can make a better world through our actions but…"

"No buts," The Doctor interjected, "Not on my show 'cos it's on at 'prime time'." He winked at Martin and carried on. "The human race has a spiritual destiny that _can_ be achieved. This can be done, as it has been done on thousands of worlds out there. You, as a species, are at a crossroads and you must decide collectively which way to go. Do not dis-empower yourself by thinking there is nothing that can be done. You have all the power of the universe inside you and you are creating your life with your every thought, word and deed. I will tell you this…You _are_ evolving spiritually on your planet. Yours is a race awakening from its slumber. They just need some help waking up… _You_ just need waking up! And quickly because time is short and there's much to do." He walked over to Martin and crouched down in front of him. "That's why I'm here now talking to you." He winked knowingly and bit into another chocolate hob knob.

Martin smiled at The Doctor's confident expression. "Why? Apart from apparently telling me the meaning of life, why are you here?"

The Doctor shrugged and stood up. "Well, I'm here to save the world, aren't I? It's what I do on a weekly basis. And the brilliant thing is…" He looked around as if checking no one was listening and then leaned forward into Martin's ear

"… You're here to help me"

'If one desires a change,

One must be that change

Before that change can take place' -

Gita Bellin


	15. Chapter 15

**FIFTEEN**

'If we are truly in the present moment,

And not been carried away by our thoughts and fantasies,

Then we are in a position to be free of fate and available to our destiny.

When we are in the present moment, our work on earth begins' -

Reshad Feild

"I'm here to help you save the world?" Martin was more puzzled than ever.

"Yeah… Great isn't it?" The Doctor beamed his Cheshire cat smile and tilted his head on a slight angle.

"How?" Martin's face was a picture of confusion. "How am I? What do I have to do?"

"All you've got to do is listen to me… Listen to your 'self'… See what you 'feel' about it… And then act on all you know" The Doctor scrunched the bottom of his lip up and then shrugged slightly as if that explained everything.

"What does that mean?"

"Oh, you're always full of questions you, aren't you?" The Doctor was teasing him now. He smiled and winked "Good man. Never stop asking questions, Marty. Asking questions is good"

The Doctor turned around, his back to Martin and faced the ancient city below. He took a few paces away from the deck chairs and walked slowly towards the mountain ledge. He thrust his hands in his trusty trouser pockets and tilted his head back and took in a deep lungful of the fresh, cooling air.

Martin got up from his seat and walked gingerly over to where The Doctor was stood. He followed The Doctor's gaze out towards ancient Nazareth.

What an amazing, breath taking sight. The buildings were bathed in darkness yet candle light shone through creating flickering dances of yellow and gold against the stone walls. Smoke rose from the streets and homes and still the sound of chanting and worship could be heard emanating from the tallest buildings.

"Peaceful, isn't it?" The Doctor nodded towards the city.

"Yes, it looks it" Martin scanned the buildings and streets with a quick glance. "Yeah, from up here it does look peaceful"

The Doctor nodded gently his face was now grave and sombre. "Your world is in trouble, Marty" The Doctor kept his gaze on the city and spoke in his best 'matter-of-fact' voice. "Back in your own time, I mean… The early part of the 21st century… Your world needs your help"

"I'm all ears, Doctor" Martin literally put the tip of a finger on his right ear and pushed it forward slightly, "What can I do?"

"The book…" The Doctor smiled softly and nodded back in the area of the deck chairs, where 'The Book of Life' laid face down in The Doctor's seat. "You must learn to read the book… You must learn to _live_ the book… And then all that you have to do will be clear. And then, eventually, the world will be healed"

Martin frowned in the direction of the book. "Are you saying that _that_ book has 'The TRUTH' in it? That it supersedes the Bible? The Koran? And, if you are, doesn't that make that book just another 'Holy Scripture' to be revered and fought over?"

The Doctor let out a little laugh. "Oh Marty, you can be so funny when you get all serious and play Devil's advocate" He smiled and strode swiftly to pick up the book. He lifted it from it from its resting place and flicked it open. "This book is very different. It's a special book that would speak to everyone in a very unique and different way… Because the way it is written… The only way it can be read… Is by the individual" He drummed on the back cover with his fingers twice and then look down into the book.

Marin was still confused. "I still don't understand what you mean, Doctor"

The Doctor read from the book:

'If you do not go within… You'll go without'

"This book is about getting to the truth of You, Marty. And you already know that the Truth is within you just waiting to be discovered… Now all you need to do is allow yourself to find it there." The Doctor closed the book and handed it to Martin with a confident smile on his face. "It's time for you to read the book, Marty."

Martin took the book cautiously and held it in his hands like it was made from fragile glass. He gazed at the cover for a few seconds and then looked up at The Doctor's expectant face.

"The last time I looked in one of your books, Doctor, I saw my worst nightmares. I really don't want that to happen again" Martin looked intently at The Doctor for reassurance.

"Oh, I promise that it wont happen this time, Marty. The only thing you'll find in there is the potential for wonderful dreams and breath taking realities" The Doctor turned around to sit in one of the deck chairs. "It might take you a while to read it, though. It's not as straight forward as it appears"

"Why? Is it written in some form of alien gobble-de-gook or something? Doesn't the TARDIS' neural interface thing do its job on this?" Martin looked down at the unopened book.

The Doctor laughed gently. "No, the TARDIS doesn't need to translate it. Just open it and see"

With one last sideways look at The Doctor, Martin clasped the bottom right hand corner of the book and began to open it slowly. As the cover turned the first thing he saw was…

…Himself.

He saw himself staring back at himself. The pages in the book weren't pages at all. For inside the book was one long seamless mirror. The perfect reflection didn't bend with the book cover, as it was unfolded. The mirror simply _was_ the inside of the book.

Martin stared into his own eyes for a few seconds before looking up to see The Doctor's beaming face.

"Clever, eh?" The Doctor winked at Martin's still stunned expression.

"If you don't go within… You'll go without?" Martin quoted back to The Doctor the last thing he had read.

"There you go!" The Doctor said happily "Blimey, you're picking it up quick!"

"I didn't read it… I just remembered you saying it" Martin wasn't sure what to make of all this.

"Oh yeah, I see…" The Doctor sat back in his chair and munched on another chocolate hob-nob that had seemed to appear out of thin air. "Let's see if you 'remember' anything else, shall we?"

Martin walked over to one of the deck chairs, the one with it's back to Nazareth, and sat down slowly.

"What do I have to do? There's nothing to read" Martin had stopped looking in 'The Book' and was staring at The Doctor.

"You can start by not looking at me for one. Look in the book… Look in your self… Look inside your self" The Doctor was leaning forward now, his hands interlocked around his knees. His voice was gentle and reassuring.

Martin looked down at his reflection. He looked tired, he thought. He needed a shave. His hair was a mess. Was that a spot starting to appear on his forehead?

"Stop looking at your outward self" The Doctor interrupted. "That's just your shell. The 'You' we are after is not your body. Look deep into your eyes… Go as far as you can and then keep going… Keep going… The eyes are the windows to the soul"

Martin stared intently into his own greenish blue eyes and tried to relax his concentration and posture.

The Doctor's voice was smoother than ever and the choral chants from the city melted inside his sound "The soul is the highest part of yourself… It is the source of all knowledge… Tap into the soul and you will experience all the wisdom and love of God…."

Martin was truly relaxed now. He could feel himself falling into his own eyes and the memory of the beautiful glow he'd experienced earlier was returning so vividly he could almost feel it again.

"Doctor…?" Martin panicked slightly and drew himself out of his own gaze.

"Don't be scared, Marty. There's nothing to be scared of… There's only love here… There's only love" The Doctor nodded encouragingly at Martin to continue. "It wont sweep over you like last time, Marty… Not if you don't want it to"

Martin returned his gaze to the mirror. He breathed out slowly and relaxed his breathing, allowing himself gradually to be 'inside' himself once more.

"Now, think of a question you'd love to be answered" The Doctor said softly. "If there's one thing that would make you feel 'better' about life, what would it be? What one answer you make you feel… comforted?"

Martin already knew his answer and the words were forming powerfully in his mind:

'Life is Eternal'

"Say it, Marty, I know you can feel it" The Doctor was leaning as far forward in his chair as he could. "Say it out loud so I can hear it"

Martin looked up from the book, tears were in his eyes and his voice was cracked and brittle. "Life is eternal," He said softly.

The Doctor smiled warmly. "Yeah, and do you know who brought you that little gem of a sentence?" He nodded at the book.

"Yeah, I did… Through the book"

The Doctor nodded again. "Yes, you did… although you had a little help. Take another look"

Martin frowned and looked back into the book. He stared at his eyes for a few seconds before realising… those weren't his eyes. They were female eyes. Beautiful kind, blue eyes he hadn't seen since…

"Nan?" He gasped quietly in disbelief. "Nan? Is that you?"

The eyes smiled lovingly and Alice Briggs' angelic face slowly became a solid reflection inside the mirror.

She looked much younger than Martin remembered her but it was unmistakably her. There was none of the pain on her face that Martin had seen so much over the last few months. Now she was radiant, transformed and angelically beautiful.

"Nan… It is you…" Martin could contain his tears no more and wept as he spoke.

"Don't cry, love" The reflection spoke "There's nothing to cry about. I'm here… I'm always here"

Martin was overcome with emotion. An intense sensation was taking over him again and he felt he might slide into unconsciousness at any second. "But I saw you die… You were in so much pain"

"I'm not in pain anymore" Alice Briggs smiled the smile of Martin's childhood, her voice was just how he remembered it when he was eight years old and he used to visit her every school lunchtime. "I'm at home again… I'm at home with God…Where no pain exists and no shadows fall. And I've come here to you now to give you this one truth… A Truth that will be the first of many but the one you needed to hear now so you could stop thinking sadly about me and start remembering joyously all the times we shared… And all the time we've yet to share"

Martin wiped tears from his eyes and gazed lovingly into his Grand Mother's radiant face. "That life is eternal?" Martin whispered.

Alice smiled proudly. "You always were a smart boy"

Martin laughed and touched the mirror tenderly, stroking his Nan's cheek. "I love you, Nan… And I miss you so much"

"I love you too, and I'm always here when you miss me. As soon as you think of me I'm here beside you and I have been since the moment I left you. So stop worrying about me. There's nothing to worry about. Life is eternal…"

Her image began to fade slowly and Martin could see his own reflection moving into view. "Nan! Don't go! Please don't go again!"

"I'm not going anywhere… Didn't you here what I just said? Even if you can't see me or even hear me, I'm still here." Her voice was disappearing inside the wind. "I'm always with you… Life is Eternal…"

And then she was gone.

'Dear God,

When my Nana comes to Heaven will she be old like now, or will she be young again? I saw some pictures of her when she got married and she was beautiful. It would be nice to meet her like that. Love, Dana (age 8)' -

'Dear God - Children's letters to God', Carmel Reilly


	16. Chapter 16

**SIXTEEN**

'Give way to the stream of life and tumble into the chasm, not knowing… It is only when we're lost in our wondering that we can come into our sacred world'

– Priscilla Cogan, Winoma's Web

It was dark now. The air had cooled and a peaceful calm had settled over the city. Some of the buildings were lit from campfires below and shone dimly standing firm against the coming night. The sound of crickets danced through the twilight air and gave off an almost hypnotic rhythm of peaceful calm.

And that's how Martin felt… Blessed with a peaceful calm.

He was sat deeply in bedded in his deck chair looking out over the ancient city. A tartan blanket was wrapped around him and he was sipping at one of the Doctor's 'Master Blaster Coffee Special's. It was a coffee that came highly recommend by The Doctor who had apparently picked it up on the planet Sheridan 5 whilst battling his arch nemesis and the evil Zippaframes… or something. Martin could never really keep track of all that The Doctor was saying. He talked far too fast sometimes and Martin just couldn't keep up.

It had been forty minutes since his Nan's 'Visitation'. Forty minutes since he'd been told 'The First of Many Truths'. Forty minutes since he'd seen his Nan's beautiful, pain free angelic face reflecting back all the love he could ever dream to be possible. Forty minutes since he'd been giving the One Truth that humanity craves to know for sure…

That Life is Eternal.

That the soul goes on. That death is just a door. That there is more to life than this mortal existence and that…

…Love is forever

After Alice Brigg's image had disappeared Martin had cried deeply. Not tears of sadness but tears of complete release and total joy. It was as if his heart was about to explode such was the outpouring of emotions eradiating from his centre. He had eventually crumpled up in a comfortable heap on the ground smiling through his subsiding tears.

After about five minutes of relative silence The Doctor had left him alone and disappeared inside the TARDIS before returning several minutes later with a glass of pure orange juice.

"This is just what The Doctor ordered" He had beamed as if he'd never said that joke before. "Now you follow me, Marty… I've got just the thing for you."

The Doctor had led him to gently inside the TARDIS and down several flights of stairs before entering a large wood lined bathroom. In the centre of the room was a huge, white bathtub, which was full of light blue bubbles and steamed proudly with piping hot water. There were even candles around the outside of the bath.

"Now this doesn't mean we are going out or anything, Marty" The Doctor had said cautiously "It's just a bath… For you… on your own" He nodded at Martin who just smiled at The Doctor wondering why he would even think anything else in the first place. "So just chill out… choose some music… Get you head together and then we'll carry on… ok?"

Martin just loved the bath; it felt so good to wash all the sand out of his hair, the dirt from his hands and the damp sweat from just about everywhere. He also loved the way he could name any music aloud and the song would play magically in the air and seemed to dance inside the mist (A 'gift from Britney', apparently). The temperature of the water too seemed to adjust itself to the occupant's current thought, so it always remained the perfect temperature. And even the beautiful, blue bubbles moved gracefully over his body as if they were literally washing him, like tiny workers happily doing what they were born to do. Maybe that's what they were? This TARDIS of the Doctor's truly was a remarkable craft.

Whilst bathing amongst the bubbles and melodies in the air Martin thought back to the events of the last few hours. From the fear and utter desperation of what he saw above Mount Sinai and in The Doctor's 'photo album', to the love and perfection he had seen and, most of all, _felt _since 'The Book of Life' had been opened.

What a journey…

…And it wasn't over yet.

After he had spent a good half an hour soaking up sounds and soap Martin lifted himself out of the bath and dried slowly with big fluffy white towels. He found his clothes washed, ironed and hung on the bathroom door wrapped in transparent plastic with the words 'K9 Kleaners Inc' written on in a 'futuristic' logo. The Doctor must have put them there at some point but Martin had not seen or heard him enter.

After dressing he had made his way up the stairs to the main control room. The room was empty but The Doctor's voice sprang from the pitch black 'coffee making' room just off to the left of the central console.

"Go sit down outside, Marty. I've set up our chairs and there's a blanket for you. I've just getting us a 'Master Blaster' sorted!"

"Thanks for the bath, Doctor… And the clothes!" Martin had called as he made his way to the TARDIS doors. "That's a hell of a laundry service you've got going there!"

"Yeah, well… I've got to give the little fella something to do!" The Doctor had shouted in response. "He doesn't like been locked in his kennel every day!"

Martin wasn't even going to ask about who 'The little fella' was so he made his way outside and towards the deck chairs.

Now here Martin was… Totally relaxed and completely calm. Slumped as far inside his deck chair as gravity would allow whilst staring out over ancient Nazareth in the year 29AD. It was almost as if all of this was _the_ most natural thing in the world. That _this _was something that _everybody_ did _every_ day.

"So…" The Doctor began, finally breaking the forty-two minutes of (almost) silence "How are you doing?"

Martin looked around at The Doctor and smiled contently. "I'm wicked, Doctor. I'm totally chilled and I just feel… great, yeah"

"Great?" The Doctor frowned disappointedly "Wicked and great? Is that it? Oh, Marty… I was hoping for a little more colour!"

Martin laughed "Sorry, Doctor… But what do you want me to say? It's been amazing… all of this has… It's just been incredible. You've shown me so much and… I've seen so much… I've learnt so much… And I cant thank you enough for what you've done for me…" He reached out his hand for The Doctor to take. The two men shook hands and smiled at each other.

"I wasn't after compliments, Marty… Although they don't do any harm" He said as an afterthought "I was just wondering if you're ready to carry on? We've only scratched the surface here you know. You've only read the first sentence from the book. Wait until you get to chapter 333… It's a _real_ belter!"

Martin reverted his eyes to the city. His voice was soft as he spoke "Do I have to read anymore, do you think?"

The Doctor was slightly taken aback, his face dropped as if in disappointment and then he scrunched up his lips tight under his nose, his mouth drooping at the sides. "Well, you don't _have_ to do anything, Marty. The question is… Do you _want_ to read any more?"

Martin said nothing and continued to stare out into the dying light of the city. The Doctor tapped him on his leg to get his attention and, as soon as he did, he looked into the time traveller's piercing gaze.

"Do you _really_ want to know the secrets of life? The _True_ nature of God? The Truth of existence itself?" The Doctor eye's penetrated Martin's. "Only _you_ can decide what you want to know… and what you want to remember. And you can do that anytime. It doesn't have to be here and now. It can be when I take you back home. You can be alone… with yourself… and still know the Truth because, as you've always been told, The Truth is within you… And you are never truly alone." The Doctor gestured around to their surroundings "We can end all of this right here and right now if you want to. Just give me the word and I'll set the TARDIS to take us back to 2009. We can leave it all here and you could just have learnt that one truth…" He returned his gaze to Martin, "But it'll only be leaving a job half done… And that wouldn't really help save your world, would it?"

In all the turmoil of seeing his Nan again Martin had almost forgotten what The Doctor had previously said: That the Earth of the early 21st Century was in grave danger and he himself could somehow help The Doctor 'Save The World'.

"No, Doctor… I do want to carry on" Martin nodded slowly. "It's just that it… gets scary sometimes. It's like… I do want to _know…_ but I'm frightened it'll destroy my mind… That _knowing_ will drive me mad… Like, we're not supposed to know, are we? Life is a mystery for a reason, isn't it? Maybe that just learning… or _remembering_… that 'Life is Eternal' is all I really need to know… And that my soul been touched by God is more of a gift than anyone could dream of… And I should be happy at that… _More_ than happy at that!" He looked around at his surroundings and then down at the book "And maybe I should just leave all this here…"

"Well…"

Before The Doctor could speak Martin interrupted him. "But there's more going on than that, isn't there? I'm here for a reason… A really important reason. This is more than just about me, isn't it? Now's not the time to be selfish, is it?"

"No," The Doctor said calmly, "Now's the time to be 'centred'… Self centred… but in a good way" Both men smiled. "You're here to help me…"

"Save the world" Martin finished The Doctor's sentence for him. "And that's where I'm scared all over again? What if we fail?"

The Doctor looked down at The Book of Life, which was lying at his feet, his face calm and soft. "Then they'll be nothing to fear anyway because life is Eternal" He looked over at Martin, his eyes smiling. "You of all people should know that by now"

Martin smiled back and felt a radiant calm wash over him. A peaceful serenity wrapped in an echo of God.

He nodded at The Doctor and then down at the book. "I want to carry on. I want to know everything… How it all fits together…What it is I need to do to help… and, whilst we are here… There's something I've not forgotten about… You did promise to take me to see a certain spiritual master…"

The Doctor laughed. "Jesus? You still want to see Jesus?" His eyebrows were raised and excitement danced within his eyes.

"Well, it seems a shame to come all this way and not meet him" Martin said innocently. "And I do _really_ want to meet him. And I'd love to see what he thinks of 'The Book of Life'…" Then a thought occurred to him, "I bet he's already read it, hasn't he?"

The Doctor nodded knowingly "Oh Yeah… several times I think" He smiled broadly and gave the book an affectionate tap as it lay, resting on a large biscuit plate. He claps his hands together "So, first thing in the morning, then, we'll have a trudge down there and see if he's in town. I'm sure a guy like Jesus wont be too hard to find… And, anyway, I know all his usual haunts so we'll soon find him"

"I thought you said you knew him?" Martin frowned.

"Oh yeah, I do… That's why I know all his usual haunts," The Doctor said shrugging defensively. "Me and Jay have often spent the odd night in 'The Sandal and The Donkey' putting the world to rights. Me and him… We're like that" He locked his fingers together in a show of solidarity and then suddenly sprang up from his seat. "Right! I'm off to get some firewood. We need a fire and I'm so much in a camp fire mood that I just might explode if I don't get one soon! You stay here, Marty, and keep an eye on the TARDIS. Don't let anyone near it and help yourself to coffee…" He began to walk away.

"Erm, Doctor?" Martin had to raise his voice towards The Doctor's departing figure. "Do you think it's a good idea to get a fire going? Won't that, like, attract attention?"

"Oh Marty" The Doctor carried on walking and all but his voice disappeared from sight. "Don't be afraid of attracting attention. If you're not attracting attention you're doing something wrong…and, besides, I think it's far too late to start worrying about that…" His voice trailed off into nothingness.

"What do you mean?" Martin tried desperately to see The Doctor's figure but anything further than fifty yards away was now swallowed in complete darkness. He raised his voice as loud as he felt he could without it been heard by the city below. "Does someone already know that we're here?"

The Doctor didn't respond.

"Doctor?" Martin tried again, panic rising inside his voice "Doctor!" He shouted through clenched teeth.

Nothing.

Martin turned his view back to the city and shook his head "Why does he have to be so mysterious and enigmatic all the time?"

"Don't worry… He's even like that with me"

The male voice came from somewhere over Martin's right hand shoulder: The complete opposite direction from where The Doctor had departed.

"What?" Martin spun around in shock. He could see no one through the increasing darkness. "Who…Who are you? _Where_ are you?" His eyes darted around the area the voice had come from.

"Have no fear, my friend… I come in peace and wish only to talk with you" The man's voice was soft and gentle and held no malice within its tone.

Martin's heart almost froze as he could now see a dark figure moving from out of the shadows. The man wore simple, light garments his hands held out to Martin in greeting. His face came into focus: It was kind and welcoming and his radiant smile outshone even The Doctor's. His skin was light brown in tone and his hair cropped short and neat. His eyes were a perfect, piercing blue.

"Peace" the man said as he approached Martin. He looked into Martin's eyes for a spilt second and then put his hands on his shoulders and kissed him gently on both cheeks.

Martin's initial reaction was to step back confused and bewildered. "Yeah, cheers" he said cautiously "Ermmm… Have you been here long?" He looked back over his shoulder hoping The Doctor would suddenly appear.

"Oh yes, I've been there quite a while" The man calmly said turning his head back to the area from where he came. "I've been listening in, to be honest. It's been fascinating… Really, really interesting. It's sounds like you've had quite a journey" The man returned his gaze to Martin.

"Yeah, you could say that!" Martin was really taken aback by this newcomer. He spoke with such confidence and, most confusingly, spoke with total calm. Wouldn't a man from 29AD be freaking out at Martin's mere presence by the now? After all Martin's clothes were a definite anachronism and the deck chair was surely a dead give away that Martin didn't really belong here. And that wasn't even mentioning the large blue box only metres away.

As he looked at him Martin suddenly realised he'd seen this man before. He looked a bit like a man that worked in Martin's local supermarket that, in turn, looked like a different man from The Doctor's photo album. Was this the same man? Could this be…

"Did he take you anywhere else before you came here?" The man was looking towards The Doctor's TARDIS, which was stood proudly, and humming gently, a few metres away.

"Ermmm. Yeah, he did" Martin stood up to follow the man who had started walking towards the time machine. "But, to be honest, I don't know how much of that was real because The Doctor said…" Martin suddenly stopped speaking.

The man looked around "Yes? What _did_ The Doctor say?"

"He said it was all in my head. He said that I created it out of my fear and… why am I telling you all this?" Martin looked at the man puzzled.

"Because you want to?" The man offered with a smile. "You've nothing to fear with me, my friend"

The man had moved right up to the TARDIS now and gently stroked the side of the blue, wooden time machine and then looked up at the glow coming from the windows.

"He's always bringing people here, you know? You're the forth one this week" He raised his eyebrows at Martin's confused expression. "Did he not tell you that bit?"

"No" was all Martin could whisper.

The man nodded knowingly "Typical. _And_ I bet he didn't tell you he's really…"

"Well, well, well…" The Doctor's voice rang out from behind them. "Look who it is… Speak his name and he will appear… Like a genie in a lamp!"

Martin spun around to see The Doctor standing a few feet away from them, firewood filling his arms. His huge grin was bigger than ever and his eyes burnt bright with happiness. He dropped the firewood where he stood, reached in his inside pocket, drew out his sonic screwdriver and, looking down, pointed it at the collection of sticks and branches. With a gentle hum the sonic glowed blue and flames erupted in the middle of the wood. The Doctor then strode purposefully towards the newcomer with a beaming smile and arms outstretched. The two men embraced and kissed each other on the cheeks like life long friends. The Doctor put an arm around the man and turned him to face Martin.

"Have you introduced your self yet?" The Doctor asked the man squeezing his shoulder as he did so.

"No, not yet" The man smiled once more at Martin. His eyes were the most amazing eyes Martin had ever seen. "We've only just met and I've not had the…"

"Can I do it?" The Doctor interrupted. "Please? I love this bit"

The man laughed and nodded knowingly at The Doctor who seemed as excited as a little child on Christmas morning. "Be my guest, Doctor… I know how much you love playing up to this part" The man nodded and winked at Martin who smiled back, confused yet bemused by The Doctor's behaviour.

"Martin Briggs" The Doctor began clearing his throat "It is my up most pleasure to introduce to you one of my best mates in the whole universe. He's a guy that I would trust with my life and ranks up there with…"

"Doctor! Please stop!" Martin interrupted "Your embarrassing yourself! And him!" Martin nodded over at the smiling man. "I know who he is. I've known since the moment I saw him"

Martin looked directly into the man's perfect blue eyes. They were filled with such love and compassion that they could only belong to one man.

"He's Jesus"

'Ask, and it shall be given to you;

Seek, and ye shall find;

Knock, and it shall be opened to you.

For every one that asketh, receiveth;

And he that seeketh, findeth;

And to him that knocketh it shall be opened' -

Jesus' words, Matthew 7:7-8, The Bible


	17. Chapter 17

**SEVENTEEN**

'Come to the edge, he said.

They said: We are afraid.

Come to the edge, he said.

They came.

He pushed them... And they flew' -

Guillaume Apollinaire

"Hello, Martin"

Jesus smiled back into Martin's face and met his gaze full on.

"Oh Jesus…" Martin suddenly averted his eyes, bowed his head and fell down onto his knees. It was an automatic reaction that seemed almost inbuilt inside of him. "Oh Jesus… Jesus…" He kept his head lowered and stared at Jesus' feet. Should he kiss them? Would that be the appropriate response? "I can't believe it… I can't believe you're here… And talking to me… I can't believe you just said my name!"

He suddenly felt a warm hand underneath his chin. "What are you doing down there?" Jesus said softly. "Do you think I want you to cower before me?"

He lifted up Martin's face so he could see him but Martin had his eyes slightly closed and kept blinking repeatedly.

"Please look at me properly, Martin" Jesus said gently. "I don't expect nor want you to be like this with me"

Martin allowed his eyes to open slowly and was met with smiling face of Jesus. He radiant blue eyes were full of kindness and understanding and his expression was calm and comforting.

He helped Martin up from the ground and patted sand off his jacket as he did so. "Now please stand up and treat me just as you would any other friend"

"Oh don't be telling him that, Jay" The Doctor interrupted "He'll be asking to borrow all sorts! DVDs, books…" He looked down at Jesus' feet "…Sandals. Before you know it you'll be walking barefoot with nothing to read or watch!"

Jesus laughed gently "He can have what he wants. What's mine is his"

"I'm sorry, lord Jesus" Martin said softly "Forgive me. It's just out of respect for you…."

"Martin please" Jesus interrupted "Forget all this 'lord' business. That's not who I am. I'm here as your friend not as your master. Despite what others may have told you… We are equal you and I" He nodded reassuringly at Martin who still looked in shock and on edge.

"I'm sorry it's just… In the time I come from… you're revered…and worshipped as a god… And…"

"Errrmmm, Marty" The Doctor interjected suddenly, almost whispering into Martin's ear "You'd best be careful what you say to him about your time…" He nodded at Jesus "Time lines and all that. We don't want any fractures in the space/time continuum"

Jesus looked at The Doctor and put a hand gently on his shoulder. "Oh, Doctor, I know all about the future, you know that. He doesn't have to guard his tongue with me"

The Doctor's mouth dropped at both sides "Oh… OK" He stuffed his hands inside his trusty pockets. "Yeah, of course you do… You know everything, don't you? I was forgetting" He leaned over and whispered once more in Martin's ear "Forget what I said. Tell him anything. Let the time lines be damned!"

Jesus almost frowned at the Doctor "That's what he's here for, isn't it? To get a new understanding of me and take it back to his time? That's what you brought the others here for too wasn't it? To help spread my real message?"

The Doctor looked almost guilty as if he'd finally been caught doing something he shouldn't really be doing. "Yeah… Yeah… It's just didn't want to make it that obvious…" He nodded at Martin. "Plus, you know, he's a 'fan'… He expects me to talk about the space/time continuum and all that 'Timey-Whimey' stuff!" He caught Jesus' eye "But thanks for spelling it out for him and pointing out the contradiction" He added sarcastically.

Jesus returned his gaze to Martin. "I'm here to give him truth… That's what he's here for. And, in the asking, so shall he receive" Jesus then turned around and moved towards 'The Book of Life', which was lying near one of the deck chairs. He picked it up respectfully and stroked the cover with the palm of his hand. "Ahhh… 'The Book of Life'…" He beamed happily at The Doctor. "I remember the first time you brought this for me to read. What a day that was!"

The Doctor laughed heartily "Oh yeah… I remember. I've never ran so fast in my life! And back then I was an old man! I've still got that photo Mary took!" He eyebrows raised suddenly "How is the wife, by the way? Is she still going on about you making those tables for her?"

"Mary is fine, Doctor. And I finished those tables last month!" He winked knowingly. "Now shall will get on with this and talk about my marriage and my carpentry some other time?"

The Doctor looked scolded "Yeah… Sorry, Jay. I've just got a mouth like a jibbering Donkey sometimes! Do carry on…"

Jesus gently laughed as he reached out to open the book. With his thumb and forefinger he slowly opened the cover and tilted his head as the book unfolded in front of him. He looked down into the book as a tranquil calm overtook his face. He stared into the mirror and began nodding his head slowly as if reading something he truly agreed with. He placed the book gently on the soft lump of crass by his feet.

He suddenly looked up at Martin. "Do you want to know my message, Martin? Do you want to know my _real_ message?"

Martin's voice was soft as he spoke "That's what I'm here for, Jesus…"

"Then listen…"

'The most difficult thing but an essential one

Is to love life,

To love it even while one suffers,

Because Life is All.

Life is God

And to love Life

Means to Love God' -

Leo Tolstoy


	18. Chapter 18

**EIGHTEEN**

'The most powerful thing you can do to change the world, is to change your own beliefs about the nature of life, people, reality, to something more positive... And begin to act accordingly' - Shakti Gawain, 'Creative Visualisation'

"Mine is a message of love"

Jesus stood perfectly still. His hands were open and his face a vision of serenity.

"Love is all there is… It is ultimate reality… It is the Truth behind every illusion… And the nature of the soul itself...

The soul is an aspect of God… A tiny fragment of the majestic whole. That is how you are one with God… and with everything else that exists… God is love and love is all there is…

As humans we operate in a reality that denies all this, of course. We see another and we think we are separate from them because that is how it appears...

But the Truth is… Your are One with all mankind. You are linked by divinity… And divinity lies inside each one of you...

Love is knowing this. And knowing this would change the world"

Jesus smiled knowingly at Martin and continued...

"Until mankind can embrace this one Truth your world will always be in conflict with each other. You will fight over who has the 'One True Faith' or who is 'Right', but 'right' is objective and no religion has 'The One Truth'… For if they did… they would not fight!

For THIS is The One Truth... We are One...

One with God... And with each other...

I and the Father are One...

Love is the energy that binds us. And the energy that binds us is Love...

Love is God. And God is Love"

He smiled lovingly at Martin.

"We are One with God"

Jesus turned his eyes towards the city below.

"The religions don't teach this, of course. I have been called a blasphemer many times for uttering such words. And I have no doubt the day will come when I will pay a price for speaking this truth out loud..." He looked sadly towards Nazareth as if having visions of future events. "But speak this truth I must... For I have a mission that I must see to its end"

He glanced over at The Doctor whose face was now sullen and 'neutral'. The Doctor returned the glance but only for a second before averting his eyes to the glare of the campfire.

Martin looked over at Jesus who had returned his gaze to the city below. How old was he now, thought Martin? Thirty-one? Thirty-two, maybe? How many years... or even months... is he away from been taken for crucifixion? That brutal death that will still be remembered, and worshipped, 2000 years later. Does he know what's going to happen? Is it part of his 'mission'? Does he already know how the story ends…?

Jesus reached out a hand and pointed at the tallest buildings in the city.

"Down there... and in your time... The religions teach that God and man are separate and that God is unknowable and doesn't even want to be known! And that he's angry with us and wants nothing more than to destroy us and punish us for our sins…Yet this is a blasphemy in itself because God loves everybody… And I mean EVERYBODY!

Because God _IS_ everybody… and I mean… _every_… body…

Do unto others as you would have it done unto you… because they _are_ you… and you are they…And what you give to others you give to your self… because there is only one of us...

Your soul knows all of this already. On entering the physical world it chose to forget… so that it could remember again Who It Really Is… and Who Everyone else is… This is the journey of life… And it is a journey that never ends because…"

"Life is eternal…" Martin whispered

"Yes" Jesus smiled and walked back over to Martin. He knelt down before him and took hold of his right hand. He looked directly into Martin's eyes and spoke softly... "Love is forever and can never die… because, in ultimate reality, 'death' does not exist. All of life is a part of God. And God is Eternal. Eternal love…

And the part of you that shines inside when you hear these words is the part of you that knows this already. That gentle inner voice is the voice of God. It always speaks with the most loving words and the clearest truth…all you have to do is listen to it… If the words are based in love then they are True… And Truth is God expressed...

So, as it has been said many times and in many ways, The Truth is within you… and always has been… but you've been taught to deny it… Not only by the outside world but also by your own ego…"

He released Martin's hand and stood up though he kept his gaze directly at Martin.

"I'm here to give you a new Truth… Or, at least, a Truth been expressed a new way…And it is a Truth that will surely set you free…

The Kingdom of God is within you… And you bring forth the Kingdom through you…

You bring forth the Kingdom with acts of love, peace and compassion... These are aspects of your true self... as they are also the aspects of God.

So seek first the Kingdom of God... which is within you... And all the gifts of life will come to you"

Jesus turned and walked over to the fire. He picked up some small branches and threw them casually on the burning flame. They popped and crackled and begun to burn.

"Because you are One with God you are a creative being… In other words… You create your own life… And you create with thought, word and deed… First thought is where it all begins and your thoughts are made manifest in your reality…"

"Like right now" interjected The Doctor. "If this isn't a prime example of thought becoming a reality I don't know what is!"

"Indeed" said Jesus "You've always wanted to come here, Martin, haven't you? You've always wanted The Doctor to come along and whisked you away and bring you to see me… So I could tell you The Truth"

"Have I?" Martin looked around at The Doctor who was sat in the other deck chair grinning proudly. "I can't really remember… I… seem to remember… Oh, I don't know… Bits of my memory keep coming back and, although I didn't _think_ I knew the Doctor before meeting him in the graveyard, I do remember now seeing him… on telly…. I think…"

Martin looked around at The Doctor who was leaning forward in his deck chair as if enticing Martin to remember the full story.

"Have you been on TV before, Doctor?" Martin asked casually.

The Doctor let out a laugh. "Ah, yeah, once or twice, Marty!" He lent back in his chair and threw his right leg over his left. "It'll all come back to you soon and you'll kick yourself for not remembering earlier. But it's all part of the illusion… The parable, so to speak… The 'journey of the soul' and all that… The 'forgetting' and then the 'remembering' again… It'll all become clear, don't worry. You'll love it when we tell you…"

Martin frowned as a concerned look took over his face. "Tell me what?"

"Who I _really_ am in all this, of course" The Doctor shrugged his shoulders and grinned like a naughty schoolboy who knew the location of his hidden Christmas presents.

"But you're The Doctor, aren't you? What else is there to know?" Martin's voice was soft and course.

"Oh, not much… and everything!" He grinned "But don't worry, everything's ok. You trust me, don't you?" The Doctor looked intently at Martin

"Yes… Yeah, I do" Martin whispered

"Then that's' all that matters, isn't it?" The Doctor sank further back into his chair and smiled warmly. He then produced a red lollypop from his right hand pocket and whipped off the wrapper in a flash before shoving it in his mouth. "Do carry on" He nodded to Jesus and gestured with palms raised, "You say it so much better than I do" he added plumb mouthed.

Jesus laughed gently. "Well, I've had a bit of practise" He looked over at Martin and tilted his head slightly. "Are you ok, Martin? You look a little… confused."

"Wha..? Yeah, I'm fine thanks… I just… well, I _am _confused, to be honest!" He sat up and rested his elbows on his knees loosely joining his hands together. "I'm confused about three billion things actually! But, you know, it's ok… I like where we are going with this… it's good… It's all good." He bent down to pick up his mug and sipped at the nearly cold coffee. "If this _is_ all my thoughts been created reality… then I'm pleased with it" He smiled joyously "I mean… Look…" He pointed over at Jesus "I've got the most revered spiritual master who has ever lived giving me the secrets of creation one on one with cups of coffee, biscuits and deck chairs thrown in!" He then turned his finger towards The Doctor "_And_ the most famous time traveller in the Universe carting me backwards and forwards in time! I mean…How cool is that!"

The Doctor laughed and took the lollypop out his mouth. "That's _very_ cool, Marty" He grinned as he pointed the red ball towards Martin and then returned the sweet to his mouth. "You're doing great… Keep on keeping on…" he said between sucks.

"But… it's not _real_, is it?" Martin asked quietly, his face passive and inquisitive.

"It's as real as your life back home… It's as real as you want it to be" The Doctor said calmly. "Nothing is _real_, Marty… That's what you're been told here. _Everything_ is an illusion… created by you and God so that you might experience it all as the vast rainbow of creation" He stood up and walked towards Jesus. He put his arm around Jesus' right shoulder and squeezed gently with his hand. "Young Jay here is as real as you and me and he's gonna teach you how to consciously create your own reality so that when you go back home you can teach others. You're gonna give people back to themselves… by bringing them closer to their _inner_ selves… which is the 'god' in them. The world needs bringers of light and messengers of hope… And you are one of them" He moved towards Martin and took the lollypop out of his mout"You teach what you have to learn. It's a circle… like life. And this is how you will help me save the world. This is _our_ mission and we mustn't fail. The ultimate hope is that as more and more learn The Truth they'll be a massive shift of consciousness on your planet and mankind's spiritual destiny will finally be achieved"

"Can that happen?" Martin asked breathlessly.

"It has already happened… in _one_ reality. But realities are like branches on a tree" He opened his fingers out wide and held them up to Martin's face. "There's so many possibilities… so many roads that can be taken. Tomorrow is created by the thoughts of today. And the thoughts of your world can be dark indeed" He wiggled his fingers for a second before turning and walking slowly towards the camp fire. He stared into the flames and lowered his head. The fire crackled and spat and seemed to grow as The Doctor approached. "I have seen worlds on fire. I have seen races destroy themselves throughout the universe over and over again. Wars caused by petty, tribal squabbles over religion or land or possessions. I've seen mighty civilisations crumble to dust within the blink of an eye and millions of billions of innocents slaughtered in acts of stupid, pointless brutality …" He turned to look at Martin with a look of determination on his face. "And I've no intention letting that happen to this world" He said defiantly as he moved back over to his deck chair, lifted his coat tails slightly and plonked himself down. "So it's our job to wake humanity up and save them from their own mistaken beliefs about themselves and God… before it's too late"

Martin shrugged "No pressure, then" he said flatly.

The Doctor folded his legs and sank back into his chair. "Ahhh…Pressure is good, Marty. It gets stuff done!" He smiled confidently. "We'll do it… You and me… Along with Jesus… A few others… And a few others more… We'll be the change that we want to see. We'll make everyone aware of their own divinity and God will no longer be feared… but loved without reservation as the energy of life itself"

"The question is…" Jesus interjected. "How do you remove fear?"

Martin turned to Jesus "How? How do you remove fear?"

"By looking at it", Jesus said as he knelt by the fire. "You hide fear inside everything… Especially words. Fear is False Evidence Appearing Real. It is an illusion. You see through the illusion by staring right at it. Before too long… you will see right through it and know it as the illusion that it is" He glanced over at the TARDIS and then up above it at the night sky. "Take, for example, _your_ fear". He pointed at Martin at then at the sky "You greatest fear is that God is the being called Yahweh… A tyrannical, vengeful deity that demands loyalty and obedience above all else. A physical, alien being from _way out there_ who is ready to reclaim this Earth and all that is his in one last, bloodthirsty punch-up with the Devil himself…" Jesus turned his sitting position to face Martin. His back was to the fire. The light of the fire danced behind him and was hypnotic in its rhythm. "But, The Truth is, there is no Devil… And God is_ not _fear"

Jesus leaned forward and picked up 'The Book of Life' from it's resting place on a soft clump of grass.

"Your fear was the opposite of Truth… It was false evidence appearing real" He stroked the cover of the book lovingly and played with the loose, golden thread on the spine. "Your fear of God made you depressed, stilted and lonely. Who could you share this with? If the future is pre-ordained to be doomed what is the point in 'today'? Thus you stopped living in the 'Now' and lived in fear of the future… A future you had created in your own head. Your thoughts were nothing more than a collection of negative energy and you sent this energy out into the universe. And the Universe responded… By bringing you here…" He opened the book and turned it around the face Martin. He stared into the mirror for a few brief seconds before returning his gaze at upwards. "You are here to remove the Fear of God from your heart" He shook his head slowly "It doesn't belong there anyway and you cannot love God if you Fear him… God is love and love is all there is…God is the energy of life… And you co-create your life _with_ God by using that energy… So God is there to be used and not feared… And…."

"Enough! I have heard enough!" A mans voice rang out from behind the TARDIS. The Doctor leapt to his feet whilst Jesus remained in his seated position, his face still directed towards Martin.

"Blasphemers! Liars!" The voice was angry and broken and belonged to a darkened figure Martin could see slowly emerging from the right hand side of the TARDIS. "I cannot stand to hear another word coming from this heretic's lips!"

The man appeared in full view. He had long, dark hair and a beard, was pale in complexion and he wore cream robes with a red, silk shawl. His face was contorted with anger and his stare harsh and condemning.

Martin shrank back into his seat as the stranger came straight up to him.

"These two are lairs and deceivers…" He pointed towards The Doctor and Jesus, "They are evil spirits who are tempting you away from the One True God with their talk of 'co-creation' and 'using God'!" He spun around the face Jesus who had still not looked up at the newcomer. "You do not 'use' God, sinner! Your fear him and beg for forgiveness!" He lowered his body slightly and raised his voice "And you are_ NOT_ One with God… You are His imperfect creation…A termite in an ocean of filth… who sins with every movement of his lips " He shouted directly into Jesus' face…

Jesus still refused to acknowledge the newcomer and his face remained in its calm state and unchanged.

"Alright, steady on, fella…" The Doctor moved forward and took hold of one of the stranger's arms to pull him away from Jesus. "No need to get excited"

The man shrugged the Doctor's hand away "Unhand me, demon! I will have no part of me touched by your filth! You will not corrupt _my_ soul with your lies. I can banish you with just a word. All authority has been given to me by my Father" He stared hard into The Doctor's eyes. "Do you not know who I am?"

The Doctor shook his head and, along with his best blank expression, raised his shoulders. "I've no idea… but I'm sure you're going to tell me"

The stranger turned to the sitting frame of Jesus and pointed. "I am who this one _claims_ to be. I am the Life and the Way… And the _only_ path to salvation…I alone have The Truth and I alone am the Son of God. I am the Messiah on Earth…I am Jesus…"

He turned to face Martin, his eyes dark and penetrating.

"I am the _Real_ Jesus…"

'And Jesus answered and said unto them, Take heed that no man deceive you. For many shall come in my name, saying, I am the Christ; and shall deceive many' – Matthew 24:4-5, The Bible


	19. Chapter 19

**NINETEEN**

"Do you suppose I bring peace to the world? No, not peace, but division." – Jesus' words LUKE 12:51, The Bible

"_You're_ the real Jesus?" Martin sank his head back further in his chair staring in disbelief at the new comer, his eyes were wide and his heart racing. He felt physically sick and a knot twisted tight in his stomach.

"I am that I am" The stranger retorted sternly. "I am he that has all authority given to him by God… And within my hands lies the key to the Kingdom"

The Doctor stared at the man's empty hands "But you're not carrying anything!" He said as if genuinely confused.

The 'Dark Jesus' spun round to face The Doctor. "Silence, Demon!" He shouted, "One such as you would not understand and, even if you did, all you can hear are the lies of your master! You're ears are not fit to hear my word!"

The Doctor looked hurt. "What's wrong with my ears?" He clasped them with both hands as if protecting them from insult. "And can you stop calling me 'demon'… I'm a Time Lord and…"

"Be silent!" The 'Dark Jesus' shouted even louder, his face was suddenly inches from The Doctor's. "There is only one Lord of Time and you are not He!" He stared furiously into The Doctor's eyes and his gaze was met full on. The Dark Messiah gestured over at Martin, who was still sat in shock in his deck chair. "You have brought this man here to lie to him. To tell him un-truths about God and lead him on the road to Hell itself!" He looked over at the 'Other Jesus' who was still sat by the fire staring calmly at Martin as if completely oblivious to the new comer. "You even bring with you a deceiver who pretends to be me! Blasphemies and lies leave his lips easier than the twigs burn in your hell fire!" He came even closer to The Doctor's face and lowered his voice slightly. "I know who you are, demon… And I will not let you take this man's soul!"

The Doctor scrunched his face up, scratched the back of his neck and turned away from the stranger "Well… I tell you what… You don't half like the sound of your own voice and… Man, you could do with some sort of breath freshener!" He wafted his hand in front of his nose. "If you're gonna get that close to someone… You could at least sort that out! Cleanliness is close to Godliness, don't you know?"

The Dark Messiah was enraged. "You dare insult the Son of the Most High?" He raised his hands upwards and pointed meaningfully at the Doctor and the 'Other Jesus'. He then lifted his voice dramatically as if chanting a spell. "Away from me, you that are under God's curse! Away to the eternal fire which has been prepared for the Devil and his Angels!"

The Doctor waited a couple of seconds, gazed slowly from side to side and then stuck out his bottom lip. "Oh dear… Has nothing happened?" He said sarcastically "Were we supposed to vanish in a puff of smoke or something? Banished to the lower realms?" He walked slowly over to the fire and warmed his hands. "It's not going to happen, my friend. You have no authority over us…" He turned and looked at the newcomer "Because… You're not real"

The Dark Messiah looked furious. He breathed hard for a few moments and then calmed himself slightly. He then let out a slight, pitying laugh "More lies from your twisted tongue…You are the unreal one, Demon"

"Oh I don't think so, 'Jesus'…" The Doctor spoke softly and quietly "You're nothing more than a construct… A mental projection… A figment of Martin's imagination" He glanced at the Dark Messiah and laughed slightly "Look… He's even made you look like Robert Powell from that 80's TV version! White skin, thin faced, long hair… even the beards exactly the same! You're Martin's version of what _he _thinks Jesus _should_ look like, and he's come up with your image because of years and years of western culture's influence! You've been 'dreamt up', as it were" He looked over at Martin. "_He's_ your creator… sat over there!"

Martin squirmed in his seat and looked on, confused beyond understanding. "How have I…?"

"Pay no heed to this pitiful liar, _'Martin'_" The Dark Messiah totally ignored The Doctor, turned back to Martin and crouched in front of him. "You and I know what is true. There is but one creator and He is my Father… The Lord of Heaven… And the Judge of all Mankind… Follow me and I will show you whom to fear. Fear God, who, after killing, has the authority to throw into Hell. Believe me, he is the one you must Fear!"

The Doctor had heard enough "Oh leave him alone, Man! We've heard all this before! He know longer _believes_ in a God that he has to fear! He's moved _beyond_ that now! He's experienced the Love of God and that's what he's chosen to pursue…"

"You cannot _choose_ how you want God to _be_, Demon!" As he spoke The Dark Messiah didn't turn to look at The Doctor yet his voice was still harsh and confident. "God is what He _is_ despite the wishes of mere mortals! And no amount of human _thought _will change the reality of The One True Living God! He is your creator and, therefore, your judge."

The Doctor moved over to where Martin was sat and stood behind the confused man. He bent down and whispered in his ear. "You don't have to listen to this, Marty… Just say the word and this fear monger will be gone. _You've _created him… Out of your own fear…You've even made him the ultimate fundamentalist! The ultimate Bible-Basher! He's very scary and all that…But… he's not real…"

Martin stared into the Dark Messiah eyes. They were a deep, dark brown and looked back at him with a condemning intensity.

"If I am not real, Demon, then my words are harmless, are they not?" The Dark Messiah spoke softly and calmly and, although his words were directed at the Doctor, his gaze remained transfixed on Martin.

"You know full well your words _are_ harmful…" The Doctor said, "In fact they are fearful… Literally full of fear… And Martin doesn't want to hear them" He tapped Martin on the right shoulder "Do you, Marty?"

Martin remained in a state of almost petrified numbness, his eyes staring intently into the Dark Messiah's. At first he said nothing but shook his head slightly.

"Do you, Martin?" The Doctor repeated with a little more force, squeezing the seated man's shoulder as he did so.

"No" Martin whispered. "I don't want to hear what you have to say" His voice began to rise slowly as if growing in confidence encouraged by The Doctor's reassuring hand on his shoulder. "So I don't want you in this story any more… Therefore… Go…" Martin closed his eyes tight and a look of concentration over took his face. "Go! I _deny_ you exist!"

The Doctor tapped Martin's shoulder with praise "Oh, good man, Marty! This will sort him out once and for all!" He said happily.

"Go!" Martin shouted, his eyes still clenched tight and his concentrated frown was deeper than ever.

After a couple of seconds of blissful silence Martin slowly opened his eyes. The Dark Messiah was still knelt in front of him.

"Perplexing, is it not?" The Dark figure said confidently. "Maybe you are _not_ my 'creator' after all? Maybe the 'Truth' you've been told is not The Truth at all? Maybe it is the Demon in your ear that is the true liar here, Martin?" He put his hand on Martin's knee gently. Martin flinched in his seat as the Dark Messiah slowly pushed himself up to stand imposingly in front of him "I am real and I am here. And you _will_ listen to my Word…" He walked slowly towards The Doctor, the hem of his long garment trailed along the sandy floor. He moved around them, circling both Martin and the Time Lord as he spoke "This one doesn't want you to hear my word because he knows my word will destroy his lies!" He suddenly stopped and leant his face towards The Doctor. "Go over there and sit with your other lying, blaspheming friend, Demon!" He nodded over at the 'Other Jesus' who was still sat motionless by the campfire, his face unmoved and serene. "Go sit by your hell fire and await your judgement and I will teach this man The Truth of things. I will undo your wicked blasphemies and he will learn to beg God for forgiveness for all of his _many_ sins"

The Doctor shrugged his shoulders and walked around to face Martin; a look of disappointment on is face.

"Oh, Marty!" He said dejectedly "I really thought you'd left all this behind you" He bent down to look closer into his eyes. "Are you _sure_ want to go through with all of this?"

Martin let out a nervous laugh "No, of course I'm not _sure_ but I'm not sure I have much choice either, Doctor!" His voice was panicked and broken "I have no control over this at all and I really don't like where this is going and… I'm… I'm scared"

The Doctor leant forward and hugged Martin as the broken man sobbed into the Time Lord's jacket. "You'll be ok, Marty… Don't worry. This will all stop when _you_ want it to, ok?"

Martin pulled The Doctor tightly into him "Can't you help me, Doctor?" he whispered anxiously.

"No… I can't" The Doctor said gently, slowly removing himself from Martin's grip. "Not this time. This is _your_ fear… Your False Evidence Appearing Real… Only _you_ can look at it… And make it disappear" He stood up and walked despondently over to the campfire "I'll just be over here with Jay" He knelt down beside the 'Other Jesus' and began throwing bits of stray twigs into the fire. "I wont let anything or anyone harm you, Marty, I promise."

The 'other Jesus' simply smiled at Martin and nodded knowingly. "Remember what you _felt_, Martin" he said gently breaking his self-imposed silence. "Remember your experience of God. Nothing can harm you when you remember that God is Love"

"Be silent, Demons!" The Dark Messiah turned his head only briefly in their direction before redirecting his harsh gaze once more on Martin. "You have already poisoned this man's mind enough with your talk of 'love'! What know you of Love?"

"A little bit more than you, I think" The Doctor said matter-of-factly.

"The only love you know of is the love of_ self_!" The Dark Messiah turned his back fully on the campfire blocking Martin from its warmth. "I will teach this man that Love is to be given only to God. Every day of his life he must love the Lord with all his heart and his soul putting His divine needs above all others. This is what God demands and, from His true servants, He expects nothing less!"

The Dark Messiah moved closer to the still seated Martin who now couldn't feel the heat from the campfire at all and, even worse, the dark figure had blocked Martin's view of The Doctor and 'Jay'. All Martin could see now was this Jesus' stern and solemn face as it moved ever closer towards him.

"I will tell you the True word of God, Martin" The Dark Messiah's voice was filled with authority and confidence. "And then you will take my Word back with you… To your time… To the End Times… And you will become a servant of The One True God, spreading my message to the lost and the fallen. You will do the will of Yahweh and prepare for His return!"

Martin could take no more and began to cry uncontrollably. His whole body shook and he sank forward, holding his hands up to cover his face. "Please… No…" He sobbed deeply into his palms. "I don't want that… I don't want that to be true"

The Dark Messiah ignored him completely and continued, his voice rising in tone and volume. "His kingdom will come! His will _will_ be done! On Earth… as it is in Heaven!" He lifted his hands skyward and stared up into the star filled sky his eyes were wide and manic. "On His Great and Terrible Day, the Lord of Heaven shall reclaim this earth and all will worship him!"

"Doctor!" Martin screamed. "Doctor! Please help me!" He tried to see behind the darkened figure towards the campfire but his view was still blocked.

"The demon will not help you now, Sinner!" The Dark Messiah lowered his voice…

"It's just you and me now…"

"Not everyone who calls me 'Lord, Lord' will enter the kingdom of Heaven, but only those who do what my father in heaven wants them to. When judgement day comes, many will say to me, 'Lord, lord! In your name we spoke God's message, by your name we drove out many demons and performed many miracles!' Then I will say to them, "I never knew you. Get away from me, you wicked people!" – Jesus' words MATTHEW 7:21. The Bible


	20. Chapter 20

**TWENTY**

"Whoever believes in the Son is not Judged: but whoever does not believe has already been judged, because he has not believed in God's only Son"

– Jesus' words JOHN 3:18, The Bible

"Errmmm… Excuse me"

The Doctor's face suddenly appeared over The Dark Messiah's right shoulder, his expression a concerned frown.

"He's not on his own, you know. Jay and me are still here… and we're not going to let you bully him into submission" He winked encouragingly at Martin and gave him the briefest of smiles.

The Dark Messiah turned his head slowly and stared at The Doctor with a look of hateful contempt.

"Will you not leave me alone with this man?" He said coldly "Are you so afraid that I will teach him the _real_ Truth? Are you scared that I will show him the reality of your lies?"

"No, not at all… You go for it" The Doctor said confidently "I'm just reminding him that he's not on his own… That none of this is real… That _you're_ not real… And that the voice of love is always the closest to him" He moved away from The Dark Messiah and, hands in trusty pockets, casually walked around to stand once more behind Martin. "We've had a little re-think and Jay and me are going to sit in on your little 'conversion' talk, after all"

The Dark Messiah's eyes followed The Doctor's every move and his face remained stony and yet enraged. "But I do not want you here!" He suddenly shouted angrily.

"Tough!" The Doctor shouted back with equal force "We're here and we're not leaving him alone with you!"

The Doctor rested his left hand on Martin's right shoulder and then, with his other arm, suddenly reached behind him and pulled forward the other deck chair. He placed it gently next to Martin, then lent down and brushed the seat twice with his right hand as if removing some imaginary dust. He then beckoned over to the campfire where the 'other Jesus'… the 'Light' Jesus… was stood. From where Martin was sat his figure was a perfect silhouette in front of the raging flames.

"C'mon, Jay" The Doctor said affectionately "We're on. Marty needs our help… He's obviously not quite ready to look at this on his own" He squeezed Martin's shoulder gently.

'Jay' walked calmly towards where Martin was sat. His eyes were transfixed on Martin's and his smile was as beautiful and as calming as ever. He walked right past The Dark Messiah without a hint of acknowledging his presence.

"I do not want this impostor here!" The Dark Messiah protested again as he raised himself up to his full height and moved towards Jay. "I will not have one who blasphemes in my name anywhere near me!" He reached a hand out to take hold of Jay's shoulder… And it passed straight through him. Confused The Dark Lord tried again. Again his hand passed clean through the still walking figure of 'The Light Jesus'."You see?" The Dark Messiah turned to Martin a look on confirmation on his face "He is not even real" He pointed accusingly at Jay who was slowly moving behind Martin. "My hands pass right through him! He has no substance! He is a phantom… an evil spirit!"

Martin was shocked and beyond confused now. How could this be?

But then, to his astonished relief, he suddenly felt Jay's warm comforting hand rest on his left shoulder. He felt his soft breath on his ear as the 'Light' Jesus whispered lovingly…

"Do not be afraid…I am here"

Martin smiled inside. He felt a slight 'echo' of his previous 'experience' and, in doing so, awoke a memory of the deep, residual glow of the love of God. He felt his confidence suddenly rise as if that touch and those words was all that he needed to feel and hear. He then pointed accusingly at The Dark Messiah.

"Well, I can feel him!" He said his voice rising in tone with every word. "So it must be _you_ who is not real! _You're_ the impostor!"

The Dark Messiah moved angrily to stand right before Martin. "You think I am not real, Sinner?" He stared threateningly into Martin's eyes and raised his hand palm outwards towards Martin's face. "Shall we see?"

He then slapped Martin hard over his left cheek. Martin reeled in shock and clutched at his face.

The Doctor moved forward grabbing The Dark Messiah's arm. "Now there's no need for that!" The Doctor said pushing The Dark Lord away from Martin's chair.

"Unhand me, demon!" The Dark Messiah shouted into the Doctor's face. He shrugged off The Doctor's grip and then looked the Time Lord up and down knowingly. "Ahhh… So it seems _you_ are real at least!" He said letting out a slight, condescending laugh. "That means I can do this…" He raised his right hand once more and, this time, slapped The Doctor hard across his right cheek.

"Will you please stop hitting people!" The Doctor shouted rubbing his face whilst moving his jaw cautiously from side to side. He looked at The Dark Messiah with a condemning frown. "Blimey… what sort of example are you setting doing stuff like that?" He added in a high pitch tone.

"I am the Son of God and I can do as I please!" The Dark Messiah retorted sternly. He raised his hand again but this time The Doctor grabbed it.

"Ah ah…" The Doctor said wagging a finger in The Dark Messiah's face, "The first one was for free… You don't get another chance…" He said threateningly through gritted teeth.

The Dark Lord shrugged from The Doctor's grip once more, looked at Martin and then down at the ground beneath his feet. His eyes focused on 'The Book of Life' and, before anyone could stop him, he swooped down and picked it up.

"Look at this…" He said disapprovingly as he held the book out in front of him. "This is a book of lies! It is a tool of The Devil! There is only one Book of Life and every man's sin is written inside it. My Father in Heaven is it's keeper and on the Day of Judgement the book will be opened and each will be judge according to their actions"

He threw the book on the floor and raised his foot…

"No!" The Doctor shouted but it was too late. The Dark Messiah brought his foot down hard on the cover and Martin could hear the mirror inside crack and splinter with the impact.

The Dark Lord dug his heel into the cover and twisted it even more as bits of the fractured mirror started to fall out of the sides. He stared victoriously at both The Doctor and Jay as if by smashing the book he had defeated them.

"Oh you're lovely you, aren't you?" The Doctor said sarcastically. "Do you know how hard it is to come across a first edition copy like that?" He added pointing at the twisted book at The Dark Messiah's feet. "There's not another copy of that this side of the Forlax Nebula!"

"Worry not, Doctor" Jay said softly. "We don't need the book anymore"

"So… The Evil spirit speaks" The Dark Messiah looked down his nose at Jay. "He may have no substance… but he still has his voice. He still has his lies…"

Jay looked at The Dark Messiah for the first time, a look of pity etched on his face. "It is interesting that you call me evil… yet you are the one who has already demonstrated your violence" He said lightly.

"What I have 'demonstrated', Blasphemer, is my hatred of you and your Master" The Dark Lord almost spat his words out. "You worship Satan himself! I, however, love the Lord my God with all of my being and I will crush His enemies underfoot as easily as I destroyed your precious mirror!"

"Your threats are as empty as the love in your heart" Jay responded gently.

"And you have no heart to feel love" The Dark Lord whispered harshly.

"Blimey…. It's like handbags at dawn" The Doctor said dryly. He then looked down at Martin and winked.

Martin turned to his right and looked at 'Jay' who was now sat in the deck chair next to him. The 'Light' Jesus was sat perfectly still staring into The Dark Messiah's eyes with a look of complete calm and even, Martin noticed, a slight smile. Firelight danced inside his eyes as he was lit with a warm, orange glow from the campfire.

The Dark Messiah's face remained angry and agitated, almost as if he was in pain. With his back to the fire he was also in constant shadow, he features dark and threatening. His eyes narrowed suspiciously as they remained fixed on the other Jesus'.

The Doctor knelt down beside Martin's chair and then whispered excitedly in his ear.

"Well, here we all are, Marty… The Dark versus The Light… This next bit should be interesting!"

'Jesus said:

The images are manifest to man

And the light that is amongst them is hidden

In the images of the light of the Father

The light will reveal itself

And his image is hidden by his light'

- Logion 83, The Gospel of Thomas


	21. Chapter 21

**TWENTY-ONE**

"No one goes to the Father except by me"

–Jesus' words JOHN 14:6, The Bible

"So who's going to start then?"

The Doctor looked between the two Jesus' with unhidden anticipation. He was stood up now just over Martin's left shoulder rubbing his hands together and grinning confidently. Both Jesus' were still locked together in an unblinking stare, their bodies almost statue like and their breathing soft.

The Dark Messiah's eyes suddenly moved to look at the Doctor, a look of contempt written all over his face. His eyes then moved once more to Martin and his facial expression relaxed slightly.

"Tell me this, _Martin_", The Dark Messiah said in a tone that reminded Martin of a strict schoolteacher, "Why do you believe these… _Men_?" He pointed at The Doctor and Jay. "Why do you believe their lies when you have already seen the truth with your own eyes?"

Martin looked puzzled "What… What do you mean?" He said frowning.

"Before you came here you visited another time, did you not? The time of Moses? You saw Yahweh's mighty chariot above the Mount… You encountered the Angels of Heaven… You saw the Judgement of God?" The Dark Messiah's eyebrows were raised inquiringly.

"Well…" Martin began unconfidently, "The Doctor said that none of that was real" He shifted in his seat "And he said that I made it all up in my head"

"Oh I see" The Dark Jesus said sarcastically "So The Doctor just _told_ you none of it was real and you _believed _him?" He stared over at The Doctor with accusing eyes "And then he brought you here, showed you a book with a simple mirror in it and then got one of his deceiving minions to come along and pretend to be me?" His harsh glare turned first to Jay and then back to Martin. "Then he filled your head with the lies of Satan, told you blasphemy after blasphemy and _then_ told you _I_ was not real" He pointed at Martin's still sore cheek. "And we both know that's not true, don't we?"

Martin thought back to the face slap he'd just received from The Dark Lord. He could still feel how real, and how hard, the blow was when he hit him.

"But… There was an experience too," Martin protested. "I felt Love… Pure, unconditional love… And a connection… A 'One-ness' with all things!" His eyes turned to The Doctor and then to Jay. "That was real… I know it was!"

"Of course it was real, Marty" The Doctor smiled warmly at Martin and nodded encouragingly. "You can't fake that, can you?"

"Tricks of the Devil?" The Dark Messiah suggested. "Dark, forbidden magic?" He looked down at Martin's empty cup "Or simply… Drugs in the coffee?"

"Oh come on!" The Doctor shouted, "Since when have tricks of the devil ever felt like love? And unconditional love, at that? We're here giving him a message about peace and love and you're saying that _we're_ the demons?" He scrunched his nose up as if in disgust. "What planet are you from?"

Martin thought that was an ironic question coming, as it did, from a Galifreyean.

The Dark Messiah's voice was calm. "I am from the realm of Heaven. And I do the will of my Father"

"Is it your Father's will that they should be blood shed?" Jay spoke softly; the expression on his face was of almost genuine concern.

The Dark Messiah paused. He turned his head slowly to Jay "My Father's will is to be followed without question. If bloodshed is required in defence of the law of God then it is my Father's will and therefore must be obeyed"

Jay sighed "And thus… Wars begin" He said sadly.

The Dark Messiah turned to face Martin once more. "Do you deny that you live in the End Times, Martin?" His voice was loader now, as if trying to drown out anything that the 'Other' Jesus might say. "Do you deny that your time is full of war? And of barbarity and cruelty?"

"Mainly in the countries ruled by religion, I'd say, wouldn't you, Marty?" The Doctor interjected.

The Dark Messiah ignored him "Is your time not full of sin and fornication? Do you not worship false idols… 'Rock' stars… 'Movie' stars… 'Celebrity'? Is your society not a fallen, decadent race leading lives of dishonour and immorality?"

"Not all of us, no" Martin responded.

"Oh, so you think yourself superior, is that it?" The Dark Lord mocked.

"No, I didn't mean that… I…."

"Are people from your time not lovers of money? And themselves? Are you not ruining your very world with pollution? Does not your whole world financial system hang on a thread… corrupted by the deceits of your sinful leaders? The Whore of Babylon has many friends…"

"It's not like that everywhere! There's a lot of good people in the world and…"

"You are all children of the Devil! And Satan himself feeds your world with his fornicating filth!" The Dark Messiah shouted angrily. "Your sin is greater than at any other time in your earth's history and your judgement will be hard and just! Yahweh will return and the world will be cleansed of all evil!"

"But I find _that _evil in itself" Martin's voice was cracked and broken. "The idea that God is so… Tyrannical… And angry… Not to mention jealous and blood thirsty!"

"God is what he is, sinner" The Dark Messiah retorted, "If you think that God cannot be all those things and more then you do not know God!"

"It is _you_ that doesn't know God, my friend" Jay said quietly. "God is love… And love would _never_ be the punishing deity of your imaginings"

The Dark Messiah looked shocked and almost lost for words "My 'imaginings', Demon?" His voice was raised once more. "It is your _imaginings_ that have led billions on the road to Hell itself! Small is the way to Heaven and few truly find it! But I am here to give this man a chance of redemption. I am the Life and the Way. He must follow me… or be consumed by the lies of your Master!" The Dark Messiah rose to his full height and turned his back on the three of them. He walked slowly over to the campfire and began to warm his hands within the heat of the flames. "You must choose, Martin" He said coldly, his back still to them. "You must choose eternal Life with me… Or eternal death with these demons. The choice is yours… But choose quick for God is returning and his wrath is great!"

"When's all this supposed to be happening then?" The Doctor asked condescendingly. "When's this great and terrible day going to happen? Pretty soon, is it?"

"Yes" The Dark Lord replied, "I am its herald. The end will come soon… Very soon. Many here now will not taste death before the end comes"

"Well, that's a bit interesting really 'cos Marty here is from two thousand years in your future… Or there abouts… And still… nothing… Not a glimmer of 'The Kingdom Come'… Some of your more 'fanatical' followers are still waiting for the end to come… They've been waiting quite a while…" The Doctor buried his hands once more in his pockets.

"They will have not long to wait now" The Dark Messiah almost whispered the words. He then looked around at The Doctor "And two thousand years is but a blink of an eye to an Immortal God!"

The Doctor remained silent. Martin looked around at him, then at Jay and then over towards the campfire where the The Dark Messiah remained in his silloutted form. "So do you expect all your followers for the next two thousand years to live in fear of God? Do you want them to think that the end of the world is about to happen and live in constant fear of that? Is that your _real_ message?"

The Dark Messiah said nothing. His head was bowed and his hands locked together in prayer.

"Is it?" Martin repeated.

Still The Dark Messiah did not respond.

"Tell me!" Martin screamed, but still the Dark Messiah said nothing...

Martin turned to the 'Light' Jesus next to him. "Jay, please tell me that that is not true"

Jay smiled at him confidently. "It's not true, Martin. Your world and time has its problems… many of them, in fact… But you _can _all rise above it… As many of you are doing already" He put his left hand on Martin's right arm "Look at how some of mankind has spiritually evolved by your time. In many of your more advanced nations, you are free to question now… Your women are given 'equal rights'… Certain races are no longer used as slaves and are treated as all mankind should be treated… equally. Mental illness is no longer put down to 'demonic possession' and charitable acts are improving the lives of millions everywhere. Your awareness of your environment and your changing world are helping you make radical changes for the better. There is much too do but you are slowly turning the corner… Yours is a race awakening from its slumber… Yours is a race at the start of its next, greatest adventure" He turned his whole body to face Martin and took both his hands in his. "What your world needs now is a new understanding about God and about Life. Your old ideas about God are creating the sort of religious extremism that we've faced here today". He pointed at the Dark Messiah who was still facing away from them deep in prayer. "_He_ represents the _old_ ideas about God. That's why you've brought him to this moment. This God of fear and judgement is the tool that all false religions use to control their members. Mankind has taught of this God for millennia… But it is a god of your own imagining and has no truth in Ultimate reality at all" The 'Light' Jesus smiled his perfect smile and lowered his voice to a gentle whisper. "This new message that I bring about God is my _real _message. It is the one you will take back to your time with you so that you can help remove the fear of God from your planet and thus help save the world from it's own self destruction" He pointed then once more at The Dark Messiah. "Both he and his vengeful god are _not_ real…"

Suddenly a loud, bleeping noise rang out across the hilltop. It seemed to be coming from inside the TARDIS.

"ou-oh" The Doctor said nervously "That doesn't sound good" He craned his neck upwards and looked up into the clear, night sky. He began moving towards the TARDIS doors. "I better go and check that! It sounds like the proximity alarm!" He disappeared inside the time machine.

Martin raised his eyes up and looked deep into the star filled sky. Thousands of the bright pinpricks of light swam inside the heavens. Martin stared into the endless abyss; it's majesty and wonder were breath taking.

Then, out the corner of his eye, he could see what looked like stars going out one by one. He turned his head to see more clearly. The stars weren't going out at all. Something dark and huge was passing in front of the distant suns blocking them from his view. His stomach turned and his heart felt like it had almost stopped.

"We're in trouble" The Doctor raced out of the TARDIS holding a phone sized device in his right hand. He pointed upwards and its bleeping increased in speed and almost became one, long tone. "Something really large and unfriendly looking has just entered the Earth's atmosphere right above us!" He continued pointing the hand held machine at the black, oval mass that could now be clearly seen directly above them. It had stopped moving now and taken its place within the night sky. "It's locked into geo-stationary orbit!" The Doctor's machine suddenly altered its tone and was now producing a loud, high-pitched whine. "Oh no, no, no…" The Doctor looked scared and confused. "Now three smaller objects have left the Mother ship… And are heading straight for us!"

Martin's heart was racing. He could see three lights coming out of the middle of the black silhouette; they were slowly getting brighter against the darkness of the ship.

The Dark Messiah turned to face them all once more. His head was lowered yet his eyes were locked on Martin's. He raised his head slowly, his smile was more of a sneer. His prayers were finished now... for they had been answered.

"Now you will see the truth for your selves… There is nowhere for you to run" He said calmly and then added…

"My Father is coming…"

'God will invade. But I wonder whether people who ask God to interfere openly and directly in our world quite realise what it will be like when he does. When that happens, it is the end of the world. When the author walks on the stage the play is over. God is going to invade, all right: but what is the good in saying you are on His side then, when you see the whole universe melting away like a dream or something else - something it never entered your head to conceive - comes crashing in; something so beautiful to some of us and so terrible to others that none of us will have any choice left? For this time it will be God without disguise; something so overwhelming that it will strike either irresistible love or irresistible horror into every creature. It will be too late then to choose your side'

- CS Lewis, 'Mere Christianity'


	22. Chapter 22

**TWENTY-TWO**

'But He (God/Yahweh/Jehovah) said,

"You cannot see My face, for no man can see Me and live!" -

Exodus 33: 20, The Bible

"What are they, Doctor?"

Martin was looking directly above him at the descending 'lights'. His eyes were wide with building fear and his voice coarse and ragged.

"I'm not entirely sure, Marty" The Doctor's head was tilted upwards too as he held his detecting device towards the approaching vessels. "But I have some nasty suspicions and a feeling it's not going to be good if we stick around here…" He suddenly lowered his head to look at Martin and raised his eyebrows, "So I think this is our cue to leave". He pocketed the hand held device and strode purposefully towards the TARDIS.

"You cannot run from God, demon!" The Dark Messiah was stood with his arms open wide and his gaze transfixed on the approaching lights. "There is no hiding place from the Kingdom's throne! Sin does not go unpunished! And punished you will be as your last judgment draws near…"

The Doctor was stood at the door of the TARDIS looking upwards once more. "Oh, I can out run anything in this old thing" He patted the outside of the ship affectionately, "As long as I get a good head start!" He looked over at Martin. "Come on, Marty, it's time we were off!"

Martin frowned intently at The Doctor and then glanced to his right at Jay who was still sat in his deck chair his head tilted towards the heavens watching, with interest, the approaching lights.

"What about Jay?" He asked

"You can leave me here if you wish, Martin, I have nothing to fear" Jay said softly, "Because none of this is real" His eyes turned to Martin and his smile was as warm and as confident as ever. "It is all an illusion created by your own fear. It is_ your _False Evidence Appearing Real and it cannot harm me"

The Dark Messiah laughed manically "You will not be saying that when the Angels of Heaven cast your stinking carcass into the Lake of Fire!" He pointed upwards at the still advancing 'lights' "Very soon you will be on your knees begging for mercy… but none will be shown to you!" He pointed directly at Jay, a look of total disgust on his face. "You sinful insect! You have committed the ultimate blasphemy by pretending to be me and that will never be forgiven! NEVER!"

Martin shifted his gaze between the two Jesus' and then over to The Doctor who was now stood with half of his body inside the TARDIS and his left arm outstretched towards Martin.

"C'mon, Marty… We need to go… Now!" His eyes pleaded with Martin, his face etched in growing fear.

"Why, Doctor?" Martin was really confused now. "I thought you said that none of this was real? I thought you and Jay knew the Truth about everything that's going on here? Why are _you_ frightened? Why…"

The Doctor suddenly rushed over to Martin and grabbed him by the shoulders. "It's because I'm The Doctor and this is what you _expect_ me to do!" His voice was dramatic and excitable. "It's because fighting and running away from big, scary aliens is what I do, isn't it? And it's because _you_ are making me like this!"

"What?" Martin frowned even harder, "I don't understand! How am I…?"

Suddenly a loud, deep klaxon like noise shook violently the very ground they were standing on. It was the same sound Martin had heard before near Mount Sinai. It was the 'Trumpet blast of the Angels'…

A hollow, empty feeling routed itself deep in Martin's stomach as he and The Doctor slowly raised their eyes to see what was above them. The three 'lights' were now slowly forming into recognizable shapes: Two giant metallic Angels were descending either side of a large sphere like object. They were still some distance away but getting larger with every second…

"Oh no, no, no…" The Doctor gasped and turned to run towards the TARDIS once more. "We can't stay here, Marty…" He shouted as he clung to the TARDIS doors and pointed meaningfully up at the approaching trio. "That sphere is Yahweh's personal 'chariot'! You can't remain here and risk seeing him! You'll be killed! You'd be obliterated instantly!"

"You see!" The Dark Messiah said joyously, his eyes still wide and manic, "_Now_ this demon tells you the truth! He fears God at last… as you should!" He pointed directly at Martin and then at the descending sphere. "I have called my Father and he has come… To show you the Truth of things!"

Martin eyes were full of tears. The knot in his stomach tightened and his heart was beating so loud he thought it might leave his chest.

He looked up and saw the vessels clearly for the first time. The two Angels were like the ones he had seen at the Mount: Their metallic bodies held a living creature inside; their wings were vast and full of turning, hypnotic eyes. They descended feet first almost like giant, terrifying eagles creating their own private storm as they did so. Their piercing, juddering shriek cut through the noise of the building wind.

Martin focused his attention between them and onto the giant sphere: It was a perfect, pearl like object that almost looked transparent. Clouds of white and purple mist mingled slowly inside the structure creating swirls of ever changing patterns that danced inside an internal light. Two gold metallic, girder like camps hovered at both the top and the bottom corners of the sphere not quite touching the surface.

"So shall it be in the End times!" screamed the Dark Messiah triumphantly. "Yahweh will return on clouds of great glory… And every eye shall see!" The windstorm creating by Angels blew his hair and garments in every direction and his eyes narrowed to avoid flying grains of sand. "Every man will be judged and only the faithful few will be resurrected to live forever on a paradise Earth!"

Again the 'Trumpet Blast of the Angels' rang out, louder and more terrifying than ever. Martin clasped his hands over his ears tightly but still felt the frequency hit his stomach hard and he felt himself keel over. He staggered forward a couple of paces but managed to remain standing.

After the klaxon died away there was an unearthly silence. Yahweh's chariot and the two metallic Angels had now stopped descending and hovered majestically in front of the hillside: about 300 yards away from where Martin was stood.

The Sphere's surface was perfectly smooth as swirls of purple and white moved gracefully inside the light eradiating from the giant pearl. Water vapor dripped from the gold clamps as jets of a steam like mist occasionally burst out from underneath the metal, breaking the silence with short, hissing sounds. The craft was so close now Martin could even make out strange, almost hieroglyphic markings on the gold 'clamps'.

The two Angels hovered on either side of the Sphere, their wings stretched fully outwards in an almost peacock like pose. One held a device like a golden staff in its right hand. He pointed it slowly at Martin who was now stood paralyzed with fear.

"Get on your knees, sinner!" The Dark Messiah shouted angrily. He came up behind Martin and prodded a bony finger into his back. "You are standing before the Lord your God! Get down on your knees and worship him… Now!"

By now Martin was crying hysterically. He feel forward onto his knees and buried his face into the mixture of grass and fine sand which lined the hillside. He banged his fists into the ground repeatedly sobbing uncontrollably.

"That's it, Marty!" The Doctor suddenly shouted, "Avert your eyes! Don't look at him! Now just turn around and make your way back to the TARDIS! Crawl if you have to! We can still escape!"

"**There is no escape, Demon!****"** The harsh, metallic voice came from the staff wielding Angel. **"****You are before the presence of the Lord Yahweh… None shall run from his throne… And I, Gabriel, would hunt you until the end of time if you tried to escape!****"**

"Well…there's no harm in trying" The Doctor responded almost apologetically.

Still sobbing Martin lifted his head and looked around to see what Jay's reaction was to all this. The 'Light Jesus' was still casually sat on his deck chair looking at Martin with great pity and deep concern. He shook his head slowly, then rose to his feet and moved gracefully over to Martin's kneeling form.

"This is _not_ God, Martin…" He said softly placing a hand on the broken man's shoulder. "You know it's not God… God is love… You _know_ that… You _experienced_ that… Internally… You _felt_ the love of God…"

"And now I feel the _fear_ of God!" Martin shouted angrily. He looked up once more at the hovering Sphere. "Both are real to me!"

"But both are not real in ultimate reality" Jay whispered gently. "One is a construct of your own imagination. It is a product of your 'thoughts'… But it is a negative thought…Look at what it is doing to you… Your fear is crippling you… Not to mention everyone else on this journey with you!"

"What is that supposed to mean?" Martin cried frantically.

"It means you're not alone in all this" Jay raised his voice slightly. "There are others to consider here… Others that have shared every step on this journey with you… You're not alone, you know… You never have been…"

"I still don't know…" began Martin.

"Get into the TARDIS now, Marty!" The Doctor's voice rang out from behind Jay. "This is your last chance! I'm going without you if you don't come now!"

Jay turned slowly towards the TARDIS and walks towards the open doors. "It is time to leave this behind you now, Martin. It is time to turn your back on this God of Fear…" He said as he stood by the TARDIS doors next to The Doctor. "Come with us"

"If you go with them you will be destroyed!" The Dark Messiah stepped right up to Martin and gripped his right arm firmly. "They are demons from Satan himself and have been sent here to tempt you from the One True Path!" He physically turned Martin's head towards Yahweh's 'chariot' "You see the truth before you. God is before your very eyes and still you would deny him!"

Martin gazed into the pearl. As he focused he could see a massive dark shape moving within the swirling mist. Was this God?

"Martin… You must choose now…" Jay called out from the door of the TARDIS "I offer love… The love you know exists deep within your soul… There is no trick been played here… I am not the one who is deceiving you… _You_ are the one who is deceiving your _self_…The God of my teaching is Love… And that's what I offer you now" He extended an open hand towards Martin. "Please come with me"

"You offer nothing but lies and a sure passage to the Lake of Fire!" The Dark Messiah screamed "Be gone, Demons, and leave this man's soul to God Himself!"

Suddenly there was a loud cracking sound and a hiss of compressed air. It was coming from the Sphere…

The Dark Messiah raised his hands towards the floating pearl, his eyes were closed and his head tilted backwards. "The Lord will reveal himself!" He shouted triumphantly "The face of God will enter into this world!"

"Martin!" The Doctor's voice rang out from inside the TARDIS "You cannot stay here! No man can see the face of God and live! We must run… We must run far away from here… And we must run NOW!"

But Martin was literally paralyzed with fear. He was kneeling directly in front of the Sphere, his hands by his sides and his gaze transfixed on the floating chariot. Inside the dark mass was moving...

There was another loud cracking sound and another burst of compressed air.

Then, slowly, the pearl began to open…

'Then the LORD said, "Behold, there is a place by Me, and you shall stand _there_ on the rock; and it will come about, while My glory is passing by, that I will put you in the cleft of the rock and cover you with My hand until I have passed by. Then I will take My hand away and you shall see My back,

But My face shall not be seen."

Exodus 33: 21 -23, The Bible


	23. Chapter 23

**TWENTY THREE**

'One may not reach the dawn save by the path of the night' -

'Sand and Foam', Kahlil Gilbran

"Now, Martin!" The Doctor's panicked voice rang out from inside the TARDIS "Turn and run… NOW!"

Martin was still kneeling and had his back to the TARDIS. His eyes were totally transfixed on the giant, opening pearl that hovered majestically in front of him.

The Dark Messiah was on his knees also, his head bowed in respectful obedience. He had moved slightly in front of Martin as soon as he had heard the second 'crack' from the Sphere and was now in position to welcome his Master.

Brilliant, piercing light was coming out from the right hand side of the giant pearl as more jets of steam erupted from the surface. The metallic Angels had now turned their whole bodies to face their Lord and Master, their wings almost touching the ground feet away from where Martin was knelt.

Shafts of the blinding light coming from the Sphere were now lighting up the surrounding hillside and even the night sky seemed to warm to it's glow.

The Angels suddenly let out a calmer, softer version of their 'Trumpet blast' that was almost melodic in its tone but never the less still shook the ground threateningly.

With tears streaming down his face, Martin suddenly realized his own breathing was slowing down and he felt himself almost falling into the Angel's hypnotic tone.

And then… it was as if time itself suddenly…

…Froze…

Martin found himself inside a cocoon of silence and nothing around him was moving or changing in any way. He could feel, but not hear, his own heart beating hard against the inside of his chest and his short, shallow breaths made no sound at all.

After a moment he realized that time had not stopped completely. Things _were_ moving but very, very slowly. The Sphere was still quarter opened and its light was still edging its way towards him but at a much-reduced rate. Particles of dust and sand hung in the air and moved around Martin's eye-line almost like tiny planets circling a giant sun. It was as if time itself had changed its rhythm…

Inside the silence Martin heard a soft, gentle voice whisper:

"Who Are You?"

The voice seemed to be coming not from an external source but somewhere deep inside of himself.

Before he could really react to it, time seemed to 'jump track' once more and everything returned to 'normal'. The Angel's 'song' again filled Martin's ears and the light from the Sphere started to advance towards him at an ever-increasing rate.

Then Martin suddenly felt himself been dragged backwards. He was been pulled and lifted from underneath his shoulders. He looked above him and saw The Doctor's determined face.

"C'mon, Marty! There's no way I'm leaving you here!" The Time Lord shouted as he pulled Martin towards the TARDIS' doors. "We're not staying a moment longer!"

As Martin felt himself been dragged through the doors of the Time Machine he looked out towards the Sphere. It was nearly half open now and The Dark Messiah's figure was silhouetted against the blinding light. Rising to his feet and turning to face the Tardis, The Dark Jesus pointed straight at Martin and screamed…

Suddenly the light was cut off completely as The Doctor slammed the TARDIS doors shut. At first Martin felt like he was in complete darkness but after a couple of moments, the warm glow of the TARDIS interior entered his vision.

He was lying on his back near the doors staring up at the domed ceiling. He turned to see The Doctor running frantically around the TARDIS console banging controls and twisting levers. Jay was stood casually on the other side of the room; his face was still as calm and serene as ever. It seemed that _none_ of this was affecting him in _any _way…

"Right… Let's go!" The Doctor cried and stabbed at one final control. The center column rose and fell and the wheezes and moans of The Doctor's Time Machine filled the room once more. The Doctor moved around to the 'scanner screen' "Let's see what they're up to now…" he said excitedly as he pressed a couple of buttons and the screen sprang silently to life.

Martin got to his feet and moved over to the central column. On the scanner he could see outside the ship: The Sphere was no longer opening and was beginning to reseal itself. The Angels were now looking directly at the TARDIS, their giant wings were moving upwards as if preparing for flight. The Dark Messiah's face was contorted with anger as he shouted and wailed in frustration.

The Doctor flipped another switch and the Dark Lord's voice could now be heard inside the ship.

"…all sinners! How dare you try to run from the Lord your God?" He screamed his words out viciously "You will be crushed and sent to the eternal fire for this!"

The picture on the scanner then began to change as the TARDIS took off. The Sphere, The Angels and the figure of The Dark Messiah got slowly smaller as the TARDIS began to rise further away.

But the Angels hadn't given up…

Both of the metallic beings flew directly upwards following the TARDIS' ascension. Yahweh's Sphere followed them at great speed and within seconds the screen was full once more with their image.

"Ah Ha!" exclaimed The Doctor excitedly "They'll never be able to follow us into the time vortex!" He pushed at another few controls and then slammed his fist down hard on a big red button. The TARDIS buffeted and shook and both Martin and The Doctor held on to the sides of the console.

Martin looked over at Jay. He was stood perfectly still. The shaking of the TARDIS was literally not affecting him; the whole room was moving… but he was not.

"Oh no…" The Doctor was looking into the scanner, panic written on every inch of his face "That's impossible…"

Martin looked at the screen. The Sphere and the Angels were still following them. Their surroundings had changed from the night sky above Nazareth and was now a collection of reds and blues swirling endlessly in the tunnel of the time vortex. And yet still the TARDIS' relentless pursuers continued to advance. They were so close now Martin thought they might even burst out of the scanner screen…

Martin and The Doctor looked at each other desperately. "I'm so sorry, Marty" The Doctor said dejectedly "There's nothing else I can do… It looks like this is the end of the line"

A loud banging suddenly came from above them as if something had just clung to the outside of the ship. They both instinctively looked up at the ceiling but saw nothing so they then looked down at the scanner but now it showed only darkness…

A large, metallic ripping sound came from above them and the two men raised their heads once more to see. The ceiling of the TARDIS was literally been ripped away as, using it's giant wings, one of the Angels scratched and tore at the hull of the ship. Giant strips of ceiling were flung into the vortex as the rampaging Angel began tearing away at the metal with its bare hands.

"**You cannot escape… From the Kingdom****'****s throne!****"** The Angel shouted commandingly **"****You****'****re judgment has come… You have chosen your side… Prepare yourselves for the Lake of Fire!****"**

Martin flung himself to the floor as the whole TARDIS shook violently and parts of the metal ceiling began falling chaotically around him. He looked up to see the first Angel, who he recognized to be 'Gabriel', pulling more of the ceiling away and throwing it behind him.

Martin could also see Yahweh's giant Sphere hung behind the Angel suspended in the time vortex surrounded by a swirling haze of reds and blues. Parts of the debris from the ceiling hit the glowing pearl and disintegrated instantly upon impact. The other Angel was also tearing at the TARDIS roof and within moments the entire ceiling section had gone.

The Angels stopped their rampage of destruction and, for a moment remained still, gazing down on Martin and The Doctor condemningly.

Martin looked over at the Time Lord who was also now lying on the floor looking up at The Angels, debris from the ceiling all around him. He was propping himself up with his right elbow, his eyes were wide with panic and his face contorted with fear. He glanced over at Martin with a look of complete helplessness. He had no words of comfort now…

"**Your end is here, sinners… ****"**The Angel Gabriel's voice broke the silence, it's tone was deep and menacing. **"****You are the servants of The Devil… You are judged to have the Mark of the Beast… Now you will be joining your Master… In the fires of Hell itself…****"**

Both Angels opened their mouths in unison, their eyes wide and manic, and let out a terrifying, juddering scream.

And then, very slowly, they began to descend head first into the shattered TARDIS…

'Dear God,

Why aren't you friends with the Devil? My teacher says he used to be an Angel.

Did you have an argument? When we argue at school our teacher makes us say sorry. Would you let him back if he said sorry? Maybe then he wouldn't do all those bad things. Thank you, Lee (Age 7)' -

'Dear God - Children's letters to God', Carmel Reilly


	24. Chapter 24

**TWENTY-FOUR**

'When one realizes one is asleep,

At that moment one is already half-awake' -

P D Ouspensky

The Angel Gabriel was now just feet away from Martin's kneeling form. The Angel's metallic wings folded by his side as, his 'scream' slowly fading, he gracefully landed feet first onto the TARDIS floor.

The living creature inside the suite was around eight feet tall, his features were dark and handsome, his jaw line perfect and strong. He looked at Martin with piercing green eyes and a look of almost total disgust as if, just by been in Martin's presence, he was been somehow contaminated.

"**I told you I would hunt you… Until the End of Time…"** Gabriel's voice was no longer metallic but it was still full of authority even though he spoke relatively quietly **"Did you really think you could escape… Your fate?"**

The other Angel had now landed in front of The Doctor and was leaning over as if to pick the Time Lord up from where he lay. With giant, metallic hands The Doctor was suddenly lifted up by his throat and was held at arms length, his legs kicking at empty air. He struggled against The Angel's grip but to no affect.

Gabriel glanced around at The Doctor's hanging form.

"**This one is known to us… He is of The Fallen…He will answer to God for his lies and blasphemies…"**

He turned back to face Martin, his eyes burning with contempt and betrayal. He lowered his head slightly; his eyes still transfixed on the human, and then raised his voice condemningly.

"**As for you… You have chosen to side with Satan himself… You chose to run from God… You chose to listen to the lies of Demons… You chose… Hell…"**

"I didn't!" Martin cried desperately "I didn't choose anything! I just wanted to know, that's all… Just 'know' the truth… The Real Truth!"

He looked over at The Doctor who was still frantically struggling as he hung in The Angels grip. "It was him! The Doctor! He brought me here… told me all these things! How was I supposed to know if he was lying or not? I didn't know… I didn't know!" He sunk down to his knees and cried deeply into his hands.

"Oh, that's right, Marty!" The Doctor said sarcastically between gasps for air "As soon as the going gets a bit tough it's all 'Oh, it was him, your honour, it was all his fault! Talk about 40 pieces of silver!" He looked genuinely upset "Well, cheers for that, Marty! I know not to rely on you in a tight squeeze" He shifted uneasily in The Angel's grip as if unaware of his own joke…

"**You cannot blame others for your own choices… The Law of God is supreme and just… Sin must never go unpunished… There is a final reckoning for all souls… All will face the Judgment of God… And only The Chosen will have Life Eternal…"**

The Angel Gabriel raised his head and then looked down upon Martin and began to stretch out his arms and wings.

"**You are not of The Chosen… You are of The Fallen…" **His voice was loud and metallic once more **"You are a liar… A deceiver… A fornicator… A filthy sinner… Your Judgment has come…" **His face was now contorted with anger and hatred as he came ever closer to Martin's sobbing form.

The eyes of The Angel stared into his soul…

"**I am Gabriel… I am The Angel of Death… And I bring on you The Judgment of God!"**

Then The Angel screamed it's deep, juddering scream and lunged towards the fallen man.

Martin clamped his hands tight over his ears, buried his head as far as it would go onto the metal floor and closed his eyes tightly shut. He screamed a deep, primitive howl that began to mix with The Angel's own wail and waited for the end to come…

"**STOP!"**

The shout came from somewhere behind Martin and it was followed by perfect silence. The Angel's scream had completely ceased and there was simply no noise at all.

After a few moments of the ongoing silence Martin relaxed his body very slightly and began to cautiously move his hands away from his ears.

He could hear someone gently clapping.

"Oh, very good… Very exciting" It was Jay's voice, as calm and serene as ever. "It couldn't go on any further, though, could it? That really was the end of the line…"

Confused and totally bewildered Martin began to open his eyes…

"Oh, I'd be careful looking up too quickly if I were you…" Jay said helpfully.

Martin looked above him and jumped as he saw Gabriel's contorted form inches away from his face. The Angel was like a statue hanging over him somehow frozen in time. He scrambled out from underneath the suspended colossus and moved towards where Jay was standing.

"What's happened?" Martin asked breathlessly. "Did… Did _you_ do that?"

Jay shrugged "No… You did" He smiled warmly. "It was very good though, wasn't it? I was riveted watching it all. I can see why you like it so much!"

Martin was almost at a loss for words "Like _what_? What are you talking about?"

"The drama… The aliens… The chases through time and space… Oh, it's very good and a wonderful use of your imagination but…" He gently raised his shoulders in an almost apologetic shrug. "…It's not real"

"What?"

"None of this is real… I've been telling you that all along. You've just not really believed me before. But you'll believe me now…because we are going to see through the illusion. We're going to break down the forth wall…" Jay moved over to the TARDIS console and began flicking playfully at a few random switches. He laughed to himself as none of the buttons had any affect at all. "You can not solve the mystery of God in a Doctor Who story, Martin" He said casually.

"A Doctor _What_?" Martin frowned intently.

"Errmmm.. I don't want to bother you guys or anything but… I could do with a hand" The Doctor's voice rung out from behind Martin. He was still in his Angel's frozen, yet relentless, grip, his hands and legs hung limply below him.

"Ah, Doctor" Jay said warmly "Having fun?"

"Well, I'm The Doctor and it's what I do, isn't it? All that running away from the big, scary monsters…And I do it so well I just can't stop myself!" He grinned broadly and then nodded at the TARDIS floor "You couldn't pass me my sonic screwdriver, could you? I dropped it earlier and I think I can just about free myself if I can just…"

Jay located the Doctor's device and threw it up to him. The Doctor caught it eagerly and raised it to his neck.

"Nice one, Jay. I'll be down with you in a sec…"

He pressed the tip of it against The Angels fist and, after a flash of blue light and a short sonic blast; the creatures grip was unwillingly broken.

The Doctor dropped to the floor landing hard feet first. He then fell forward, rolling into a ball like position before finishing his expert roll back on two feet. He even clapped at the end of it… but then unfortunately tripped on a fallen piece of ceiling. This sent him in to an out of control, headfirst lunge from which his spiraling figure could never recover. He finally came to rest in a disheveled heap at the foot of the TARDIS console.

After a moment, he raised himself on one elbow and nodded at Martin. "Never do a clap after a roll, Marty" He said as if imparting some great wisdom. He then suddenly sprang to his feet, straightened his tie and flexed his neck confidently. "Now… where were we?" He said with a Cheshire cat like grin.

Martin was dumbfounded. "Can someone please tell me WHAT is going on?"

"I think you're the only one who can tell us that, Marty?" The Doctor beamed knowingly. "After all, this is _your _little adventure. And, I tell you what, I've been in some scraps in my time but that was pretty good! About to be judged by God? What a cliffhanger!" He looked over at Jay. "Mind you, shouting out 'STOP' wasn't the most original or inventive way to resolve it, I've got to be honest!" He put his hands in his pockets and strode around the console kicking bits of roof away with his battered plimsoles. "And, believe me, I've had some dodgy solutions to big massive, unsolvable threats in my time! I mean, I remember when Donna what's her face defeated the Mighty Dalek Empire by just twisting a few buttons…But shouting 'STOP!'?" He shrugged melancholy "Well, it's a new one on me…"

"But it's not resolved, is it?" Martin said confused as ever.

"No, because your story is far from over" Jay said softly.

"No, I mean… The Angels… The Angels are still here" He looked over at Gabriel's frozen form. "Is there a chance they could just…you know… come back to life again?" He added nervously.

"I don't know. Is there?" Jay responded.

"Well, I don't know! What are you asking me for?" Martin was tired of riddles now.

"Thought Creates Reality. That is a universal truth that you would do well to always remember. _Your_ thought has created _this_ reality." Jay moved over to stand in front of the statue like Angel. He looked up at its fearful face and then back at Martin. "So _you_ decide what happens next. Do you _choose_ to remain in your fear? Do you _choose_ to believe in Your False Evidence Appearing Real? Do you _choose_ to continue thinking of God as an angry, unknowable being who wants you to always live in this fear? Do you _choose_ to spread this fear outwards to all those who are on this journey with you? As always, the choice is with you…" He walked slowly over to Martin and took his hand. "Or do you want to look through this illusion and start the next chapter of your journey? For your greatest adventure is always in front of you and is but moments away."

Jay then began leading Martin over to where The Angel Gabriel remained in its death like pose. Martin hesitated, as he got closer to the terrifying figure.

"What are you doing?" He asked Jay worryingly.

"You must _look_ at your fear, Martin. And then you will see it as the illusion that it is"

"But I'm not sure I can…" Martin began.

"You can and you will" Jay told him confidently. "For I will tell you a great truth now and you must _hear _it and _believe_ it…

… You are inside a fiction…

…And it is a fiction of your _own_ making."

Jay held on to the back of Martin's neck so his eyes were locked on to The Angel's ridged presence.

"You have created this part of the story to get to this point now… Where you can look at your fear and see right through it. For your soul knows what is real and what is self created. And your soul knows that none of this has anything to do with love… And, above everything else, your soul knows that Love is what God _is_."

As Jay spoke Martin stared at The Angel and noticed that its features were getting softer as if slowly ebbing away.

"Your soul is love too. It is the highest part of you. It is a tiny part of God. It longs to be known and experienced as the pure love that it is. You have felt this pure love, Martin. You have 'felt' the truth of God and you have 'felt' the presence of your own soul"

The Angel was definitely fading from view and drifting out of reality. Martin's heart beat faster as hope began to enter into him and the illusion of fear started to relax its paralyzing grip.

"This has been an adventure long in the making for you…" Jay's voice remained calm and hypnotic, "But this part of the journey is over. Look through the illusion, Martin, and remove the fear of God from your heart"

The Angel's features were continuing to blur and fade…

"Before you fell back into the fear… Your 'self created' fear… You were doing so well. You were learning and remembering so much and it all spoke truthfully about God. But then you allowed fear to creep back in. By giving them your powerful and fearful thoughts, you allowed these creatures to exist. Y_ou_ created them…but they are _not_ real"

Martin continued to stare at The Angel's slowly fading form…

"As your own experience of love has shown you and as every spiritual Master who has ever walked the Earth has proclaimed to all those that would truly listen… God is Love. And love has played no part in this tale"

The Angel was now almost completely transparent and it was as if it was taking on the form a comic book drawing. Martin was sure he could see the ink lines around the outside of the creature.

"Love is the missing link in this chain of fear. And any God that has no love cannot be God at all. As your soul knows and as every Truth seeker has discovered, if God is your question… Love is the answer"

Martin glanced over to see the other Angel slowly dissolving too. Both angelic beings now looked like drawings from his old comic books.

Both now looked like figments of his own, child-like imagination.

With that thought they disappeared completely…

Martin let out a deep breath of pure, blissful relief and then allowed himself, at last, to smile…

"And so love wins…" Jay said happily.

"Yeahhh!" The Doctor shouted and then moved swiftly over to Martin and embraced him excitedly. "Oh, well done, Marty… I knew you'd pull through!" He then embraced Jay and both of them laughed triumphantly.

Then all three men looked up through the TARDIS' destroyed roof. Where Yahweh's glowing sphere had once hung, now shone a beautiful, golden sun. Its light beamed down on all of them and lit them in an orange, bronze like glow. Martin breathed in slowly and let the heat from the sun warm him. It was the most perfect, pure heat he had every felt.

"Breathe deep, Martin. You can finally breathe again now for this part of the tale is over" Jay placed a hand on Martin's shoulder and looked the tired man directly in his eyes. "You are at the end of the dark night of your soul and a new dawn is coming"

Jay's eyes smiled at Martin who said wearily "I'm so tired… I feel like I just want to go home"

"You will soon be home and out of this ancient world and living where you should be… In the Now… You should always live in the Eternal moment of Now. You will soon know again the God of Love and, through you and others like you, your world will be transformed and mankind will finally achieve the next step in its spiritual evolution. And the God of Love will be experienced by all of creation…"

Martin looked hopefully first at the Doctor and then at Jay. "So there is a future? The world isn't going to end? There is hope for all of mankind and a peaceful world is achievable?"

"What do you think?" The Doctor asked the question as if the answer Martin was about to give was the most important sentence he would ever say.

"I think… It's a possibility" Martin spoke softly and slowly. "I think… I'd love to see it…"

Jay grinned and looked around at The Doctor and then back at Martin.

"Then, through love and your own creative thought, you shall…"

'If I have the gift of prophesy, and know all mysteries and all knowledge; and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing'

- Corinthians 13:2, The Bible


	25. Chapter 25

** TWENTY-FIVE**

'Deep down within the core of our being lies a creative power…

The capacity to create what is to be…

And the urge to make unremitting efforts until we have given it shape...

In one way or another…

Either outside ourselves…

Or within our own person'

-'From My Life: Poetry and Tri', J W Von Goethe

Martin was sat on the TARDIS floor watching The Doctor picking up pieces of the Time Machine's roof. The debris was strewn all around the console area creating chaotic, jagged shadows inside the soft green glow of the room. The sun still hung in the sky beyond the wrecked ceiling of the TARDIS and the light it shone was now a deep, warm orange mixed with claret red. It was surrounded by a constantly darkening sky made up of the deepest shades of velvet blue.

Martin gazed around feeling strangely detached from his surroundings. Jay was knelt to his left, his shoulder resting against Martin's. He was smiling at The Doctor who, in turn, looked a little flustered and slightly annoyed.

"Well, don't let me bother you both whilst _I_ do _all_ the manual work!" The Doctor said begrudgingly reaching down to pick up another piece of debris, "You two just sit there _I'll_ sort all this out!" He stumbled slightly, nearly dropping his 'arms full' load. "… _And_ I'll make the tea!"

He suddenly kicked at a panel on the TARDIS wall. There was a wheeze of air followed by a groan of metal and then a large, square hole appeared within the roundels. The Doctor threw the debris into the shaft, the metal clanking and scraping as it was hurled into the dark. He then brushed his hands together and dusted down his jacket.

"Recycling, Marty" The Doctor said confidently "That's something your world is starting to catch up on! That's a good thing!" He looked at Martin and frowned. "Do you recycle, Marty?"

Martin paused. "Ermm… Sometimes, yeah" He said with more than a hint of embarrassment. The Doctor looked disappointed and Martin had to think quickly on his feet. "But I do always make sure my litter goes in a bin" He added brightly as if that made everything all right.

"Oh..." The Doctor said flatly, drooping his mouth down at both sides. He then banged on a big, blue button on the TARDIS console, the disposal chute suddenly closed and a gentle humming sound began all around the room. He tapped speedily on a keyboard attached to the console and raised his head towards the roof.

Martin followed his gaze to see sections of the destroyed ceiling slowly 'growing' back. It seemed that the roof was simply repairing itself with the very metal is was always made of.

"Recycling…" The Doctor repeated and then looked almost contemplative "Like the cycle of life itself" He grinned at Martin and Jay. "From knowing, to not knowing, to knowing again… On it goes…"

"What are you talking about now, Doctor?" Martin asked, his voice was hoarse and brittle.

"The journey of the soul, Martin" Jay spoke quietly yet confidently. "From knowing your oneness with God, to not knowing and then, when this 'life' is over, to knowing again. It is a journey that every soul takes… And by that I mean every soul without exception. There is no soul that is not God. For the soul and God are One"

Martin looked around at Jay inquisitively. "But, if that is the case, why did I see the things I saw? If the soul and God are _really _one... Why did I see that God of fear? Why did I put myself through all of this?"

"To show others…" The Doctor offered "And to make others question their own beliefs" He moved slowly around the console room as he spoke, occasionally bending down to pick up more pieces of the debris. "For now many people out there are asking themselves… What sort of God do _they_ believe in? If, indeed, they believe in any God at all? For humanity's idea about God shapes the world you all live in. And the world you live in is paying a price for that. Religious fundamentalists threaten your very existence and it is their _beliefs _about God that is causing this reality!"

"Beliefs are thoughts… And thought is the most powerful tool in the universe" Jay said rising to his feet, "Even the things you put down to fate come from all thoughts everywhere"

"Hey!" The Doctor shouted suddenly as if some great revelation had just hit him "'From All Thoughts Everywhere'? F.A.T.E.. Fate!" He grinned his huge grin, "Oh, that's very clever, Jay! Very quick! I like that!" He beamed.

Jay smiled and carried on "Many _will _see the God that _they _believe in within the wrathful portrayal of the 'God' in your tale. For some, God _is_ to be feared and obeyed without question. This is a God of their own understanding. For others, they will see and understand a slightly 'watered down' version of this wrathful God. They will say He _is _judgemental and capable of anger, but only towards those that _they_ personally disagree with. In other words, he is a God that is on _their_ side… Whichever side _they_ are on. And he only really punishes murderers or rapists and, of course, people from other, _untrue _faiths…"

"Your race has an amazingly varied view on God, Marty" The Doctor bent down to pick up an extra large piece of ceiling "A billion and three different ideas and theologies about God. It's no wonder your world is in trouble!" He threw the weighty debris into the recycling chute. "I mean, all this judgement and punishment... It just _might _all 'sort of' make sense if there was just _one _religion. If there was just _one _truth to choose from and you all knew it was either that or nothing... That or hellfire... Then maybe, just maybe, it might sound slightly plausible... But that's evidently _not _the case on your world, is it? A billion voices with a million different choices of belief and gods... There's even dozens of 'off shoots' of the same religions, all proclaiming that _theirs _is the 'One True Faith'. This fact alone should really convince any halfway intelligent and open minded person that such a set up cant be the work of an all powerful, all knowledgeable, not to mention 'all loving' God" He banged again on the blue button and the process of recycling hummed into life once more.

"But the Truth has a way at pointing at itself… And those who truly listen will always be given the Truth... in time. Seek and you shall find…" Jay smiled warmly. "It is time for humanity to create and embrace a new, truthful idea about God… and about themselves" He said moving towards one of the TARDIS' chairs "This is why you are here."

"But how does what is happening to me now affect others? I'm the only one that's here" Martin looked around him as if searching for hiding 'stowaways'.

"There are many here with you now as they have been since the beginning of this journey. In Truth, I know each one of them. I know theirdreams and ambitions. I know their _own_ loves and their _own _deepest fears" He paused as if hearing distant voices "_And _I know they'll be so confused about what's happening right now!" He laughed gently.

"Well, they're not alone there" Martin shook his head and allowed himself to chuckle briefly.

Jay looked at Martin and smiled. "Some people say that life is a journey of discovery. But, in truth, it is a journey of creation… This is what we are up to now. You are an incredibly creative being and therefore followed this part of the story to its logical conclusion. You have dared to ask the greatest question any one can ever ask: What is God?"

"You came up with two very different ideas about God" The Doctor interjected. "A God of Love… And a God of Fear. And you dared to ask… What if?"

Jay smiled at Martin "And what you have seen and created recently, within this shattered illusion of wrathful angels and alien gods, is your _fearful _'what if?'"

"And it looked something like this: What if you live in the long prophesied 'End Times'? What if the afterlife is really a _physical _resurrection that happens on _this_ world _after_ 'Judgement Day'? What if God is Yahweh or Jehovah? Who, in turn, is a physical flesh and blood 'King' in the 'Heavens'? This is a very tiny 'twist' on what a lot of believers think anyway..." The Doctor once more began picking up more pieces of the ceiling from the floor as he spoke.

"_Their _God, whatever they choose to call Him, is the one _True_ God and therefore His laws are the _only_ laws" Jay continued "They all show you _different_ laws, though, and all proclaiming that to choose any other law than theirs means eternal punishment for your soul. They believe in a God that is 'out there' and is going to 'get you' and punish you for your 'crimes' against Him. This theology is taught in my time and, I regret to say, it is still taught in yours"

The Doctor banged once more on the wall panel and the recycle shaft gaped open. He then threw pieces of his collection of debris into the hole as he spoke…

"Wars have been fought. Millions upon millions killed all because they all had a different idea about 'God'. And yet they all believe that _their_ idea about God is 'right'. But in this, they are 'wrong'" He threw one last piece of ceiling into the hole and then banged it closed. He pointed at Martin almost accusingly "You had your _own_ idea about this God…"

"The God in your story is a God of your creation" Jay said softly.

The Doctor nodded confidently and moved over to the console area and banged the blue button once more. "And, the truth is, maybe their God is a God of _their _creation too… Yet the very words I am saying here would be called the highest blasphemy by many followers of many different Gods. They would say these are the words of the Devil. They cannot hear the truths you have been given here and have received from the moment 'The Book of Life' was opened because their eyes are shut and their ears are covered due to literally millennia of dogma and suppression... Not to mention closed minds and closed hearts"

Jay was now sat in the one of the leather chairs that hung on the rail around the TARDIS central column. He looked over at Martin and nodded almost thankfully towards him.

"With your story you have done a very clever thing. You have blurred the lines between good and evil. And you have made the 'God' of half the worlds population into an egotistical, jealous alien."

The Doctor chuckled to himself "Well done on that… That should go down well with all the worlds' fundamentalists! I'm sure they're going to love you!"

Ignoring The Doctor Martin turned and stared at Jay. "But I heard a voice… Deep within me… It didn't seem part of the 'illusion'… It was something… _Real_. I was asked a question… Twice… Both at the Mount and then back there on the hillside"

"And what did the voice say? What was the question asked?" Jay responded calmly.

"It asked 'Who Are You?'" Martin whispered.

Jay smiled warmly. "And what other question would God ask?"

'You have come to this world in this way, at this time, in this place, to know Who You Are- and to create Who You Wish To Be. This is the purpose of all life. Life is an on-going, never-ending process of re-creation. You keep recreating your selves in the image of your next highest idea about yourselves…'

:'Conversations With God book 2', Neale Donald Walsh


	26. Chapter 26

**TWENTY SIX**

'It is good to have an end

To journey towards,

But it is the journey that matters,

In the end' -

'The Left Hand of Darkness', Ursula Le Guin

"Who Are You" Jay repeated softly.

Martin looked deeply into Jay's eyes as he spoke. He felt a perfect calm wash over him and a gentle echo of his true 'God experience'. He felt like he was been told, at last, The Truth.

"Who Are You?" Jay' said once more, his voice mingled harmoniously within the hum of the room. "This is always the question God asks. Because every moment is a moment of creation, every second you are deciding who you are with everything you think, say and do"

"The question is…" The Doctor attention was focused on Martin. "Who are you with regards all of _this_?"

Jay lent forward in his seat "This is the Eternal question…Who Are You? Who are _you_ with regards to this, or any other, view of God? Who are _you_ with regards to what this story has said about God and about Life? Who are _you _with regards to the state of your world? Who are _you_ with regards to your own family? Who are _you_ with regards to how _you_ treat your fellow man and your environment? Always the question remains the same… Who Are You?"

"It's not a simple question to answer, though, is it?" Martin asked almost defensively. "It's not like every question is answered by defining who you are… is it?"

Jay laughed and rested his hand on the seat next to him. "It is a question that every soul _answers_ every day... because Who You Are is defined by how you live each second of each day. Every act is an act of self-definition. It is all about who you are and how you live your life. Do you live it in love? Or do you live it in fear? You lived yours in fear for far too long… And I'm here to teach you how to live it in Love, so that you might teach others and thus create the future world your soul desires". He beckoned Martin to move over to the seat next to him. He patted it slightly and gave him his most calming of looks.

Martin smiled and slowly raised himself to his feet letting out slow moans of pain as he did so. This all still felt so _real_ to him and his body ached literally _everywhere_. He moved slowly over to where Jay was seated and limped slightly as he did so.

"Whoa, steady on there, Marty… Are you feeling your age?" The Doctor stepped forward as if to help Martin walk.

Martin laughed slightly "No, I'm alright, Doctor, thank you. I'm just a little… weak at the knees. It's been a hell of a day!" He plonked himself thankfully down in the seat next to Jay who laughed knowingly.

"It has indeed, my friend…"

"…And it's not over yet" The Doctor finished Jay's sentence for him. "There's one more place we need to visit before I take you back home"

"Where's that then, Doctor?" Martin's question was genuine.

"What? Do you think I'm going to tell you?" The Doctor looked almost shocked that Martin would ask. "Where would be the mystery in that? Let's just say… It'll feel like home and leave it at that, shall we?" He winked happily at Martin who could do nothing but smile back.

"Where are you taking him, Doctor?" Jay's voice was, for the first time, almost stern, "He's had enough mysteries for one day, do you not think?"

"Oh…Ok, I'll tell you this…" The Doctor said, reluctantly giving in, "I'm taking him to see Ezekiel… But that's all I'm saying for now. Without the mystery the whole thing would fall apart!" He then looked off into some imagined distance "A bit like life really…"

"Doctor…" Jay broke The Doctor's trance, "Do you mean Ezekiel as in…" He gestured with his thumb, pointing backwards over his own shoulder.

"No, I mean the other one…" The Doctor nodded knowingly forwards and towards Martin.

"Oh…" Jay seemed to understand exactly what The Doctor was saying. He glanced at Martin and then returned his gaze to The Doctor. "Oh, very interesting. What a clever idea…" He then grinned at the Doctor and shifted in his seated position.

"What's a clever idea? What are you two…?" Martin stopped himself and gave up his sentence. He had tried but he just couldn't make himself angry. It may have pained him to admit it but he was beginning to understand that the mystery could only unfold slowly. The journey itself _was_ the story and he could feel that the story was slowly coming to its end.

"But what about you, Jay?" Martin took hold of The Light Messiah's arm and held onto it gently. "You'll be coming with us, wont you?"

"Alas, I cannot, my friend" He said sadly. "My part in this tale is coming to its end and there are many more in my _own_ time who must hear my message before my work in this world is done"

Martin was horrified at this news. "But I still don't really _understand_ your message and you said you would teach me". He had only just begun to halfway comprehend what _this_ Jesus was saying. It couldn't all end now, could it? "You said you were here to teach me how to live in love and…"

"Martin, Martin…" Jay took hold of Martin's hand and gazed deeply into his eyes "If you believe that I am the _real _Jesus then you will _know _that I am with you _always_… Even unto the end of time. Therefore _listen_… and you will hear me. For I am the love in your heart and the hope in your soul. I am the voice of love that resides in the centre of your very being. I _am_ your soul. I _am_ your Higher Self. I Am God in You"

Martin broke Jay's comforting stare and looked over at The Doctor who was still collecting the last pieces of the TARDIS roof in both hands. Martin then gazed down at his own hands and began picking at the loose skin around his fingernails.

"But what if I don't believe that you're the _real_ Jesus?" He said softly "What if _none_ of this is real? Just like you've been telling me… None of this is real and I'm making it all up in my own head? What if that's true about you and your _real_ message? What then?"

Jay nodded his head in agreement and then took a moment's pause as if contemplating such a reality. "Indeed, what would that mean? Maybe I'm _not _the real Jesus and everything I've been telling you is a lie. That is, in fact, what fear would say, isn't it? That is, in fact, what your 'Dark Messiah' said. Maybe you can fall back into fear and let all he said be true" Jay looked over at The Doctor and then back at Martin.

The Doctor stepped forward. "But we've already been down that road haven't we? And there was no love to be found there" he added gently.

Martin shifted in his seat. "Well, I'm not saying that _all _that Dark Messiah stuff has to be true… but just maybe that not everything that _you_ are saying is true…"

Jay nodded and lowered his mouth at both sides "Well, that would be a fair point well said… After all, maybe I'm _not _the real Jesus and I've been brought from your time by The Doctor to 'act' as Jesus? Maybe I'm really the Jay who works down at your local super market!"

Martin paused at this and remembered back to first seeing a picture of this Jesus in The Doctor's photo album. When he first saw him he _did _remind him of one of the local Morrison's staff. In his mind's eye Martin could now picture the shop worker the last time he had seen him, stacking up the fresh bread on the shelves. For a moment, he could even see his name badge. Did that say: 'Jason'?

"Maybe you've used _his_ image to imagine _this_ Jesus?" The Doctor's eyebrows were raised. "Or, as you've already said, maybe _none_ of this is real… None of it…at all…. And maybe you're _still_ making it up in your head? What then?"

For the first time in what seemed like a lifetime there was complete silence in the room. The silence lasted for only a couple of seconds but to Martin it was the emptiest silence he'd ever heard.

"You see how easily you fall into doubt?" It was Jay that broke the silence. "You doubt the love of God. You doubt me. You doubt yourself. You do not think yourself worthy to be spoken to by Jesus or to be given truth of this magnitude. You doubt, Martin, just like Thomas. It's therefore blocking you from receiving the truth I am here to bring you". He put his hand underneath Martin's chin and lifted his head gently so Martin was forced to meet his gaze. He smiled lovingly into Martin's eyes and nodded slowly. "That is why I must leave you now so that your learning… your 'remembering'… can continue untarnished by any doubt of the authenticity of this Jesus" He stood up to stand in front of Martin. "For many who are on this journey with you will have their _own _idea about how the _real _Jesus would and _should _be. As hard as it may be for you to believe, some will see the real Jesus _more _within the Dark Messiah's dogma and judgement than within my own message of peace, love and Oneness with God. Yet some _will _see _their _Jesus within me and _hear _and _feel _the words I have brought you. Many more will not recognise _either _version contained within this tale for the own _idea _about Jesus will dominate their understanding... And that is good... That is how it is _meant _to be...That is why I must leave" He took his hand away from Martin's face and placed it on his left shoulder. "But you need not concern yourself as _you _will _still _hear my voice even after I am gone... For these words will come not only through _you_ but also through Ezekiel. Listen to him for he is a great teacher… Just as _you_ will be."

"There... It's done" The Doctor was staring proudly up at the TARDIS' ceiling. It was now back to its original state and completely whole again. He pressed at various buttons on the console and seemed more than pleased with the readings he was viewing on the computer screen.

"How is it looking, Doctor?" Jay asked lightly.

"Excellent... The Elysian nodes are fully charged and the temporal oscillators have re-aligned with the morphic resonators which, in turn, has reversed the polarity of the neutron flow whilst firing up the tacheon generators… Annnnnnd..." He banged at one last switch, "...The Kettle's on" He grinned his best grin, then turned to Jay and clapped his hands "In other words... It's all fixed. I'll be able to get you home before you've even had a chance to dunk a lovely, chocolate hob nob in a mug of hot rosie!"

"Good, good..." Jay responded, "I'll be home in time for John's party then?"

"Oh yeah," The Doctor said lightly and then turned to Martin "Jay's a right hit at people's parties, Marty. He can make the wine last _all _night… Not to mention what he can do with a minimal buffet!"

Jay laughed and turned his back to Martin as if he was about to leave there and then.

"Jesus…" Martin reached out and grabbed the back of Jay's garment. "Please don't go… I need you here… I just need you here to make all this _real_"

Jay turned once more to face Martin. "Have you not heard me yet?" He crouched down to look him directly in the eyes, "I will always be with you... Always. I am One with all things. I am One with you. I am One with Ezekiel. I am One with God"

Martin gazed deeply into Jay's piercingly blue eyes. They sparkled and shone within the lights of the TARDIS console room.

"Treat others always as if they One with you. Treat all of humanity as if they are One with each other. Treat yourself as if you are One with God. Because, in truth, you are…"

Martin felt himself falling forward into Jay's eyes. Forward into those pools of infinite compassion and peace. Tiny specs of light danced inside Jay's pupil and Martin was suddenly pulled forward, inside the blackness, spiralling downwards, falling and yet rising, in an ocean of chaotic, esoteric reality. The specs of light inside the black became huge colourful spheres, which moved gracefully around an even larger sphere. Martin realised instantly he was looking at an atom: The tiniest particles in existence and the building blocks of all matter. Electrons spun serenely circling the giant nucleus in a majestic display of perfect harmony. It was a pattern that was repeated everywhere Martin's still falling figure could see…

…An infinite universe of turning, moving spheres…

'The material world is full of familiar objects we can see, feel, touch, taste and smell. As big objects become very small, shrinking to the size of atoms, our senses fail us. Theoretically the shrinkage has to stop somewhere, because no atom is smaller than hydrogen, the first material particle to be born out of the Big Bang' –

How To Know God, Deepak Choopra


	27. Chapter 27

**TWENTY SEVEN**

'Man cannot discover new oceans until he has courage to lose sight of the shore' - Unknown Quote

…"And when you tell others about me... This Jesus that you met with a time traveling Doctor... Tell them that I spoke of love"…

Jay's voice was suddenly right beside him, still gently caressing his ear calmly as Martin's eyes began taking in the microscopic universe he was journeying through.

…"Tell them that I spoke of peace and of oneness with God. Tell them that I told you of Eternal life and shared with you the blissful realization of the oneness of all things"

… Martin continued to move towards the largest sphere, the nucleus and centre of the atom. Every colour in existence seemed to move upon it's 'surface' as Martin's still falling/rising body moved to it's left hand side. As he tumbled past the sphere his 'body' seemed to turn, his eyes remained transfixed on the colossus atom as the texture of it shimmered and blurred into a new existence…

…"Tell them that God's love is infinite... like reality itself"…

… The sphere was no longer an Atom. It was now a planet… Martin recognized it instantly; it was Martin's 'home world'… The planet Earth. The huge blue pearl hung sublimely against a dark, star filled tapestry, rotating gracefully on its axis. Its surface was made of elegant, rich blues and swirling whites and the landmasses were textures of gold and green. It looked like paradise…

…"Tell them that I spoke of peace. Tell them that God does not want them to kill in his name"…

… Martin wondered for a moment if this was the Earth of _his _time: the early part of the 21st Century. He 'felt' it was and then saw an area of land that he knew to be the Middle East. For a moment he thought of all the 'believers' down on the surface armed with their rifles and grenades, murdering innocents in the name of their 'God'…

… Then he thought of the 'innocents' been slaughtered, their pain and suffering horrific beyond measure and a demonstration of all that has 'gone wrong' with humanity's beliefs. He thought of all the children and families dying of starvation and lack of decent medical aid and then thought of the charity teams that worked miracles every day, saving lives by demonstrating incredible strength of soul and compassion…

… He then looked over to the left and could see the English Isles and America. He thought of all the people living on those islands in almost blissful ignorance, wrapped in comfort with food in their bellies, their lives almost consumed with celebrity gossip, TV shows and the latest fashion, their bodies full of alcohol, drugs and excessive fat. He thought of them throwing enough food away everyday to feed the whole world twice over and then thought of the 'select few' spending millions each day on toys and trinkets whilst desperate, life changing charities went begging for pennies…

… He then thought of all the people who demonstrated and experienced their potential by their compassion for others and their world. He thought of the peace makers, those millions who's spirituality is based on Love and, most importantly, demonstrating that love by bringing around a 'better world' in whatever way they can. He thought of those that inspire and those that 'Be the change they want to see'…

…"Tell them that True love is unconditional…It is the highest form of love… Tell them that this is how God loves them…"

… He then thought about his own family, somewhere down below him on that tiny English island. His partner and daughter: Both angelic and beautiful, a complete and true reflection of his own love. He thought of them at their home, lovingly holding each other whilst kneeling in front of an open fire. Would they be missing him? Would they even know he had 'gone'? He then thought of his Mother who had always shown him perfect, unconditional love. He pictured her now, sat on her own reading a book, smiling within tears…

…"Tell them that only together can mankind save this beautiful world. Tell them that they should stop polluting their planet and start loving it. For the Earth is a gift from God and gifts are there to be treasured"…

… Martin's 'astral body' had now moved directly in front of the huge, blue pearl and was falling away from it at an ever-increasing speed. He took in the beautiful perfection of his home world, how radiant and elegant it looked crowned in a halo of stars, and then gave a thought to all the 6.5 Billion people living down on it's surface. For a moment he felt he could 'feel' of all their individual lives and the full knowledge of all their hopes and fears: Their first kisses and last breaths, their faithfulness and betrayals, their _own_ Angels and demons, their cancers, their miracles, their songs, their tears, their births and deaths… The vast rainbow of the 'Human experience' was happening right now on that small, fragile world. What would become of it?

…"Tell them that the Kingdom of God is brought _through_ them by their acts of love and compassion"…

He gave his last thought to his family and all the other inhabitants of the Earth: a last, hopeful thought that it could all be saved by Humanity itself in a transforming, spiritual evolution and a common desire to 'make a difference'…

…"Tell them that only by treating others as they themselves wish to be treat can mankind truly experience their divine nature and realization of the oneness of all life and, therefore, the true knowledge that all of mankind are created equal"…

…Suddenly the moon was over his left shoulder, it's craggy surface seemed almost close enough to touch. Within a second he had past it and watched as it now hung in it's orbit around the Earth, slowly reducing in size as Martin continued to fall away from the planet's presence…

… Martin felt like now he was moving slowly and yet somehow at incredible speed, through the physical Heavens themselves. The orb of the Sun was far beyond the earth to its right hand side, it shone proud and strong as it had done for millions of years. More planets and spheres came into view and then fell away as the Earth itself became increasingly small and distant. It eventually became just another tiny spec of light within an ocean of limitless lights and colour…

…"Tell them that God is love"…

… Martin continued spiraling through the Earth's solar system at an ever-increasing speed leaving a faint trail of golden, indigo gas in his transcendental wake. The giant planet of Jupiter passed his right field of vision, to his left he could see the rings of Saturn. Within moments he passed a small, blue world he took to be Pluto. And then he continued to fall/rise, further and further out of his own solar system and into the rich tapestry of creation…

…"Tell them that God is life... And life, like God, is Eternal"…

…Martin's eyes could barely take in what he was seeing now. He passed Proxima Centauri and the Pleiades and then, within what seemed like seconds, solar systems and constellations came and went, majestic Nebula formed and then fell away, giant dwarf stars shone and then were consumed by the billions of other forms of light and texture. Countless other galaxies and star systems were all falling away from him as Martin's 'Astral' body continued to fall and yet rise faster and faster on it's transcendental journey…

…How many of those galaxies had life, Martin thought? Somehow he 'knew' that life existed _everywhere, life_ was been _experienced_ by countless beings on countless worlds. The thread of God weaved its tapestry through _all_ of creation…

…Eons and yet seconds passed…The Trapezium, The Cygmus Loop, Omega Centauri, The Quintuplet Cluster, Andromeda, Circinus… All of the galaxies in Heaven rose and fell before him…

…The sight that danced inside Martin's vision was a kaleidoscope of colour and movement. A glimpse of infinity wrapped in a moment of total clarity… He wasn't afraid… not even for a second…

…For now he could see all of creation contained within his vision. He was now almost completely 'out' of the Universe and could _see_ the edge of all reality itself. He was surrounded by total darkness, still falling, and the entire Universe, all of time and space, was _literally_ in front of him…

…As he continued to move away he became aware that the Universe itself was shaped as a sphere. A perfect circle containing All That Is… One giant mass of energy and light… One fragment of existence… One perfect Light…One atom in the body of God…

…One…

…"Tell them that the Kingdom of God is within them... for their soul and God are One. That the God of love is never apart from them... but always a part of them"…

… Martin was still falling/rising away from the ball of light that contained All That Is. It was getting smaller and smaller with every passing moment until it became just a small, pinprick of light inside an infinite darkness…

…"Tell them these things and then ask them… Do these _sound_ like the words of Jesus?"…

And then, just before the light disappeared totally from his vision, Martin felt himself 'stop'. He remained stationary, staring up/down at the tiny spec of light.

Strangely, he felt no fear at all. Just a perfect calm and a sense of completion…

Was he there for seconds? Eons? 'Time' didn't seem to exist any more. But here he hung: surrounded in darkness gazing up/down at the only light in all of creation...

"Jesus?" Martin's own voice emerged from his thoughts. "Jesus?" He tried again, "Jay? Jay, are you there?"

Silence...

"Jay?"

Silence...

"Doctor?"

Still there was nothing but perfect silence.

Then a gentle, female voice suddenly whispered in his ear:

"Do you want to go back?"

Martin instantly recognized the voice "Nan?" He tried to look around but his astral form remained transfixed on the fragment of light. "Nan? Are you with me?" He heard himself say.

"I am always with you… Always. And I always speak with a voice of love" The voice replied gently. "Now, do you want to go back or do you want to travel on _through_ infinity into the _higher_ dimensions?"

Martin could now see more pinpricks of light beginning to form all around him, penetrating the darkness that engulfed him. Within moments he was in a whole new reality of billions of trillions of Universes each represented by a tiny spec of perfect light…

…An infinite Universe of turning, revolving spheres...

…He was back to where he started…

"Life is Eternal," said the voice. "Eternal is forever… And forever never ends"

"I see that now" Martin 'thought' the words and he heard himself speak them.

"Do you want to go on?" The voice asked for the third time.

"No… I want to go back" Martin heard himself say.

"Good..." said the female voice gently "Then be still… And know that God is love"

Suddenly all the pinpricks of light began racing towards the 'original' source. All the 'stars' were been drawn by the 'light/Universe' Martin had just passed through, as if been pulled by some irresistible power. Martin's own 'body' was falling/rising towards it too at an incredible, ever increasing rate. But as he drew closer he realized the 'light' wasn't forming into the Universe he had seen before, it was remaining a solid ball of light. Martin's spiraling form fell into that blissful light…

'Yes'

A euphoric sensation exploded in Martin's center as pure love ran through every fiber of his being. His soul was been bathed in divine light. The same light that ran through the entire universe and every living thing… The same all-inclusive light that penetrated all the higher dimensions and every aspect of creation… The Light that shone in the heart of the Darkness… The One True Light of Existence…The Source of All Things…

… He felt God within him…Burning like a purifying fire…

…Then he was falling away again, out of the light and falling backwards through darkness. The blissful ball of light became just a fragment of colour inside the black, which in turn became just a reflection in Jay's eye…

… Suddenly Martin was 'out' and falling back into his physical body. All at once he felt heavy and 'solid', the euphoric energy slowly dissipating inside his chest.

"Welcome back, Martin" It was Jay's comforting voice Martin heard first as he slowly blinked his way back to reality.

His eyes took a few seconds to adjust to his surroundings. Although at first he felt like he was back in The Doctor's TARDIS, he soon realized he was now in a room made up of almost pure, featureless white. Jay's garments too now shone brightly and hypnotically as Martin squinted and rubbed his eyes to try and 'correct' his vision.

"How is he?" A voice said from behind Jay.

"He seems unharmed" Jay responded "But he needs to sleep now" He leaned forward and stroked Martin's face gently "He needs a good, long rest"

"But… what…?" Martin began struggling to remain conscious, trying to prop himself up on his elbows.

"Sshhhhh…" Jay said softly, his hand still stroking Martin's skin. "Time to be still now, Martin. Your journey is coming to its end. But first, you must sleep and rest your soul"

Martin allowed his body to lie back, his head landing on a soft pillow that had been placed underneath him. As he slowly began to lose consciousness he made one last effort to look behind Jay.

Where The Doctor had once stood there was now a being made up of pure light.

That same light that filled Martin's eyes slowly faded to grey and then to darkness as his waking consciousness slid into oblivion…

'The complex world of the ancient 'Chaldean Oracles' can be summed up in the idea of the ascent of the soul. Trapped in matter, it is the business of the soul to return to its spiritual home with the transcendent deity by rising up through the planetary spheres, shedding as it goes all accretions of impurity both physical and spiritual. As in Zoroastrianism, the deity is symbolized by fire: 'All things are generated by One Fire (Majercik, p.53). The soul rises through the spheres with the help of Angels, 'by making the soul bright with fire' (Majercik, p.95)' –

: 'Secret Wisdom', Ruth Clydesdale


	28. Chapter 28

TWENTY EIGHT

'To find yourself,

Think for yourself' -

Socrates

Martin awoke to the sound of bird song and a faint smell of burnt toast. He slowly blinked his eyes back to life to find himself staring up into a clear, light blue sky. He could see two birds high above him gliding care free upon the warm breeze and, even higher above them, a pure white vapour trail slowly been reclaimed by the blue of the sky. He was lying on his back on what felt to be some sort of blanket, his mouth was dry and he soon realized that he felt hungrier than he'd ever felt in his life. Still blinking slightly he cautiously propped himself up on both his elbows to take in his surroundings.

He was, once more, on the top of a lush green hill but this time he was looking out onto a scene of total tranquility. A beautiful, picture perfect lake was in the elegant valley below him, mountains stood majestically in every direction and forests and fields claimed every inch of the remaining land. A single, narrow footpath ran around the whole lake and a wooded island rested at its center. It was like something off a postcard, Martin thought, and it also felt very familiar to him, like he'd been there before…

To the left hand side of the lake stood a quaint, lone cottage; it's large garden led directly down to the waterside. A narrow, slightly cobbled road ran from the back of the cottage and up past Martin's immediate left. His gaze followed it round until his eyes were suddenly full of the tall, wooden blue box that was the TARDIS. It was 'parked' about six feet away from him, standing defiantly against its surroundings. It looked slightly different from how Martin remembered it. It now seemed larger and a deeper shade of blue…

Martin turned his head to his right where a small, white plastic table and chair were set up, decked out with a red, spotted tablecloth. A slim, black vase with a single, golden daffodil in it was positioned in the center of the table and, to the right, an upside down cream teacup rested on its plate.

"Oh, you're awake at last, Marty" a man's voice suddenly bellowed from behind him "I was beginning to think you'd never wake up!"

Martin spun around to see the newcomer. It was a tall man who looked maybe in his late twenties. He hair was dark, large and quaffed eccentrically to the right. He had a strangely square face, small, ageless eyes and a boxer's nose and wore a dark brown, tweed jacket with a blue bow tie and a grey, patterned shirt. His whole look was finished off with simple black trousers, which looked two sizes too small for him, and 'dock martin' boots. He carried a silver tray with a brown teapot on it and strode purposefully over to the plastic table.

"Who… Who are you?" Martin asked cautiously.

The man looked almost hurt "I'm The Doctor, aren't I?"

Martin was confused "Well, you don't look like him!"

The newcomer shrugged and put the teapot gently down on the left hand side of the table. "Well, I've regenerated, haven't I…" He said matter-of-factly "And about time too as well, if you want _my_ opinion. That last incarnation of mine was starting to get a bit cocky… a bit too full of himself" He looked over at Martin and grinned proudly "I'm much more at home in this body" He suddenly wiggled impossibly large fingers in front of his own face "Look at my big hands!" he exclaimed excitedly.

"What do you mean 'regenerated'?" Martin asked, pushing himself into a sitting position.

"Oh, you know about regeneration, Marty!" The 'new' Doctor said dismissively "Don't try and pretend you don't!" Before Martin could react The Doctor patted the plastic chair three times, "C'mon and get yourself seated. I've made you breakfast and everything!" He then started to match back towards the TARDIS "I burnt the toast the first time but I've got some fresh bread in now" He entered the TARDIS door and strode inside "I've made you scrambled eggs…" He shouted as his disappeared inside the blackness "…Just how you like it!"

"Well, what happened?" Martin raised his voice too, staring hard into the open door "When did you regenerate? How long have I been asleep?"

The Doctor suddenly reappeared at the doorway carry a plate of steaming scrambled eggs resting on thick, brown toast "What happened? My regeneration, you mean? Oh, it was very over dramatic and ever so slightly illogical" He said striding almost clumsily over to the white table "The Master… The Time lords… Radiation poisoning… Blah de blah…" He put the plate down on the table and unfolded a tea towel from his inside pocket and placed it over his right arm. "As for 'when'… Oh, I don't know, it's been a while ago now. It could be weeks... or months… It could even be years! Things have been a lot better since it all happened, though. My adventures seem to make a lot more sense nowadays! Better writing I suppose…" He patted at the plastic chair once more "C'mon, Marty… Breakfast is served"

Martin pushed himself up and stumbled groggily over to the table, clutching at his head as he did so. "How long have I been asleep?" He repeated wearily, his stomach literally ached with hunger.

"Oh I don't know… Could be weeks... or months… It could be years…" The Doctor looked around him suddenly as if confused, "Is there an echo in here?" He shrugged and carried on "Oh, what's 'time' to a Time Lord, Marty? What's 'time' when you're in a time machine?" He nodded over to the TARDIS affectionately. "You've been in one of the back rooms sleeping soundly for quite a while now… In 'hibernation', as it were. You needed a good sleep after what you'd been through. As Jay said, you needed time to rest your soul"

Martin lowered himself gratefully onto the plastic seat as The Doctor turned over the teacup and began pouring out the teapot's piping hot content.

"Where is Jay?" Martin asked quietly, watching The Doctor play perfect host. "Did he go back home?"

"Yes, yes" The Doctor said warmly "I got him home in time for his party. He was well chuffed. We had a great party… I went too. In fact, I think I invented 'The Birdie song' nearly two thousand years early! Jay was _great _at it! So was his Mum! He said to say 'Hi' when you woke up" The Doctor finished pouring Martin's tea and placed the teapot down carefully. "Look at that… I've forgotten to get a cup for me!" He turned and moved back towards the TARDIS. "I'll just go get myself one… and a jammy dodger!" He entered the time machine once more "Tuck in, Marty! You're bound to be hungry!"

"I'm absolutely starving" Martin said, more to himself than anyone else. He unfolded a napkin containing his knife and fork that The Doctor had placed on the table and cut off a corner of the scrambled egg covered toast. He pushed it eagerly into his mouth and melted inside as the sensations hit his taste buds. "Oh wow," he said between mouthfuls. "This is the best breakfast I've ever had"

"Pleased to hear it" The Doctor was suddenly beside him, pouring a cup of hot tea for himself. "Farrah Fawcett taught me how to make the _perfect_ scrambled eggs" He stared off into the distance as if reclaiming a long lost memory "Now, there was a woman…" He added appreciatively.

Martin laughed and took another mouthful of his food followed by a deep, thankful glug of hot tea. As he ate he took in his idyllic surroundings once more. He'd certainly never eaten breakfast in such an amazing location before.

"Where are we this time then, Doctor?" He asked quietly before filling his mouth yet again.

"I was wondering when you were going to ask" The Doctor said excitedly, biting into his second jammy dodger in as many seconds. "It's a place called Tarn Hows. We're a couple of miles north of Hawkshead in the Lake District in Cumbria… The good old English Isles"

"Oh, I thought I recognized it!" Martin sat back in his seat, his teacup in both hands. "I loved it here… I came a few years ago"

"Yeah, I know" The Doctor said walking forwards slightly in front of the table "You'll always love it. This is where Ezekiel lives" He nodded downwards towards the small cottage that stood about four hundred yards away from their position.

"What… That's his house?" Martin gulped more tea down his throat.

"Yeah, that's his abode" The Doctor spoke proudly. "I helped him build it. In fact, I helped him move his stuff in too. It's a handy thing to have for a move a TARDIS is…" He said turning and grinning warmly.

"Is he there now?" Martin asked, attacking his scrambled eggs once more.

"Yeah, he should be" The Doctor covered his eyes from the glare of the sun, squinting to see if he could see anyone inside one the windows. "He's expecting us. He's had plenty of notice we were coming" He stopped perfectly still and then suddenly pointed to the front door of the cottage. "Look… Here he comes now…"

Martin narrowed his eyes to see. An old man had just exited the house and was slowly walking towards a couple of deck chairs that stood in the middle of the large garden over looking the lake. He leaned slightly on a walking stick as he moved and, as he reached the chairs, he lowered himself slowly into the one on the left hand side.

"Oi! Zeeky!" The Doctor suddenly shouted at an incredible volume, his right hand cupped around his mouth. "Get that book ready! We'll be down there in five minutes!" He added at the same, ear shredding volume

The old man raised his head and looked over in the duos direction. He waved his right hand high above his head at them and The Doctor did the same. Martin found himself waving too although a little less enthusiastically.

"Zeeky?" Martin queried.

"Well, it's what I call him" The Doctor said unapologetically, "I don't know if you've noticed, Marty, but I tend to give people nick names"

"Really?" Martin offered sarcastically, "I hadn't noticed"

"Oh yeah, I do it all the time" The Doctor added without a hint of irony.

Martin ate the last of his breakfast, sank down the last drop of his tea and then sat back in his seat. "So why are we here, Doctor? And, I may know _where_ we are, but I still don't know _when_ we are… What year is this?"

The Doctor turned to look at Martin directly. "Finally you're asking the right questions…" He said as if he'd been waiting for that query to arise. He reached inside the left hand side of his jacket and handed Martin a piece of folded up paper. "Here you go… Today's paper"

Martin took the single sheet of paper from the Doctor and unfolded it into its full A4 size. As soon as it opened to its 'proper' size holographic like words appeared all over the sheet…'The Times' it read in thick, black font. The headline was: 'A Lasting Peace', next to it was a 3D photograph of a smiling child embracing a globe of the planet Earth….

"Look at the date, Marty…" The Doctor said gently, "Top right hand corner"

Martin's eyes moved over to the tiny text. It read: '12th July 2045'

Martin gasped aloud. "2045? Two thousand and forty five?" He looked up excitedly to see The Doctor's smiling face. "We're in the future? We're in 2045 and the world is still here? The end of the world hasn't happened?"

The Doctor grinned his best grin. "I know… It's great, isn't it?"

"Yes…" Martin said slowly, trying to take in the information, "Yes, it's brilliant… Is that why I'm here? To see this?"

"Well, yeah, partly…" The Doctor said encouragingly, "But you're also here to teach yourself about yourself and to make all _this_ future a reality"

"What do you mean?" Martin's brow was creased.

"I mean that old Ezekiel down there is here to help you reach this journey's end. He's going to be your teacher and your best friend all rolled into one. Together you're going to help change the world and save it from its own self destruction!"

"How?" Martin looked down at the old man sat casually in his deck chair. "Who is he?"

The Doctor walked over to Martin and put a hand on his right shoulder. "Oh, Marty, have you not worked it out yet?" he said with a smile. "That old man down there sat in his garden with his book of secrets and the full knowledge of all that will come to pass… That brilliant, clever old man…

… He's You"

"Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life's coming attractions"

-Albert Einstein (1879-1955)


	29. Chapter 29

TWENTY-NINE

'Faith is an oasis in the heart which will never be reached by the caravan of thinking' -'Sand and Foam', Kahlil Gibran

"He's _me_?"

Martin stared hard in Ezekiel's direction trying to see if he could 'recognize' his own face on that old man's body but he was too far away to make out any discernable, facial features.

"Well, technically speaking, you're _him_… but let's not split hairs!" The Doctor said suddenly spinning around to face Martin. "It's nearly time for you to meet your seventy-seven year old self, Marty! How much fun is that?" He added excitedly.

Martin continued to stare over at his 'future self' literally lost for words. He then saw other figures leaving the cottage and joining Ezekiel in the garden. First of all were two children who both came running out trailing balloons, one red, and one blue. They were followed by a middle aged woman who looked to be carrying a tray of food and then by an elderly lady who closed the door neatly behind her and then walked slowly, yet elegantly, towards Ezekiel's seated figure.

"Who..?" Martin began.

"Well, who do _you_ think, Marty?" The Doctor said softly placing a hand on the man's shoulder. "Who do _you_ see yourself with on this day in _this_ year at _this _place? Literally… Whom do you see your _self _with?"

Martin concentrated on the slight frame of the older woman and, as he watched her take her seat next to Ezekiel, he knew the truth in his heart.

"Is that… Yasmin?"

The Doctor nodded gently. "Yep, that's the lovely Yasmin… Your partner of, what, eight years now as you know her. But _here_ she's been with you forty-three years… the poor woman. Imagine that!"

Martin saw his older self kiss Yasmin tenderly on the cheek as she came to rest next to him. The old man took her hand in his immediately and seemed to indicate up to were The Doctor and Martin were stood. They then both waved big, exaggerated waves in Martin's direction and then hugged each other affectionately.

"We still look in love," Martin said in a half muted whisper, tears of joy slowly leaving his bloodshot eyes. "After all this time… We still love each other"

"Oh yes!" The Doctor said happily.

Martin watched as the younger woman brought food over to where the old couple were sat and placed it on a small, wooden table in front of them. Martin knew instantly who she was…

"Anya…" He said between gasps of proud and happy tears "That must be Anya... My daughter. Last time I saw her she was five years old but _here_… She's a woman! A beautiful, radiant woman!"

"She's a Mother too…" The Doctor said, squeezing Martin's shoulder in a sign of manly comfort. "Those two kids down there running around are hers. The girl is called Faith and she's eleven years old. The boy is Elijah and he's five. Lovely kids… Great Mother… Amazing Grandparents. You should be very proud"

"Oh, I am, Doctor... I really am" Martin said wiping his face free from tears and trying to take in all that was been revealed to him. "This is amazing… It's also really, _really_ crazy… but just brilliant and… Thank you for bringing me here and letting me see it" he said appreciatively, "But… How is this all going to work?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, how can I go down there and meet them all? How will I even be able to _talk _to them? Won't that like be playing with timelines and all that? Will they know who I am? Wont there be like one of those big time ripping _explosions_ if I shake hands with my future self?" Martin turned to look the Doctor in the eyes as if something else had suddenly just occurred to him "And why am I called _Ezekiel_ in the future?"

"Oh, it's like twenty questions with you, Marty!" The Doctor said in mock insult. He then smiled and patted Martin on the back. "He's _called Ezekiel 'cos that's the name I choose for him... And when I say 'I' I mean you and_ me. We're in on this together, you know that, don't you? And, as for your name choice… Well, it's a bit of an 'in-joke' with regards the 'spaceships of Ezekiel' and all that... What with you 'imagining' God as this all-powerful alien like you did… And also, to be honest, it'd be just too confusing if he was called Martin too!"

"What?"

"Well, we cant have you _both_ called Martin, now can we?" The Doctor seemed almost annoyed that Martin didn't understand that already. "How could that all work? No, he's just Ezekiel to us… Makes it all much simpler"

"But he's 'Martin' to his family?"

"Yeah, of course he is… that's his name!"

"But who am I to his family then? What will they call me?"

The Doctor paused as if that thought had not occurred to him before now. "Yeah, they can't know you as Martin, can they? So you're going to have to be called… Adric from now on!"

"Adric?"

"Yeah"

"Why Adric?" said Martin distastefully.

"Well, it's either Adric or Bob"

"I prefer, Bob!"

"Good… Adric it is then" The Doctor said with a grin before racing through the TARDIS doors with a sudden flash of energy. "Wont be a second… just got to get something…" He shouted as he disappeared from view.

"Adric?" Martin repeated to himself. Where had he heard that name before?

The Doctor was suddenly at the TARDIS door holding a small, plain wooden box. Smiling at Martin he opened it, reached inside and drew out a think, golden necklace with a large, bronze like amulet hanging from it. He then threw the wooded box behind him, into the dark of the TARDIS and then held the necklace out at arms length towards Martin.

"This is for you, Marty," He said proudly as he carefully placed it around the bemused man's neck. "Now, as Adric, you'll have to keep this around your neck at all times ok?"

"Why?" Martin asked as he fingered the large, bronze and golden medallion that hung on the thick chain, "Is Adric supposed to be some sort of 70's disco enthusiast?"

"No..." The Doctor laughed, " You see, that necklace... well, more the amulet on it, actually... It's a 'Perception Filter'... A 'Camouflage Device'... It subtly alters your features so even your own Mum wouldn't recognise you. Which is really handy as we don't want Yasmin or Anya seeing the Martin that they knew 35 years ago suddenly turning up out of the blue!" He turned and locked the door of the TARDIS, pocketed the key and then nodded at Martin's new 'accessory'. "I got it from an Ogron on the planet Minbar years ago... It's really useful for robbing banks with apparently! That's why they're banned from most worlds. They're only to be used in the most 'controlled' of ways and strict rules are in place against any un-authorised usage"

"Why have you got one then?" Martin asked dryly.

"Well... I don't obey anybody's rules, now do I?" The Doctor said mischievously. He then pointed down to the cottage and turned to look Martin squarely in the eye. "You must never take it off while you're down there ok? Ezekiel will see you as _you_... or as _him_, if you like! But Yasmin and Anya wont recognise you and will see you only as my friend Adric… Whom I have brought along with me to be taught by Martin... Who _we _call Ezekiel! Ok?"

"Ok"

"They must never know who you really are... If they ever find out the Truth, this whole plan will disintegrate... And then the Earth will fall into a temporal anomaly taking half the Universe with it while the rest of creation will fry in a wave of super heated tacheon discharge!" The Doctor said sternly, a look of 'life or death' seriousness on his face.

Martin looked horrified "Really?" He said, concerned etched on every line on his face.

"No, not really... But it might give you a nose bleed… So don't tell them, ok?" The Doctor said lightly, biting into another jammy dodger "Lets just say it's just not supposed to happen like that and leave it there, ok?"

Martin laughed "Ok, Doctor... Whatever you say" He looked down at the cottage and at his future 'family' waiting for him. He was so eager to go join them. "Can we go now, please?"

The Doctor held up one of his massive hands. "Ah ah, one more thing" He reached inside his jacket pocket and withdrew a small, black case. "You'll need these glasses" He handed the spectacle case over to Martin who took it cautiously.

"Oh, I don't have to wear glasses as well, do I? Won't the perception thingy be enough?" Martin responded in almost a whine.

The Doctor laughed at Martin's discomfort. "They're not to wear now, Marty" The Doctor muttered, taking the case from Martin and putting it in the man's inside coat pocket. "They're special glasses, as you'd expect from me!" He tapped Martin's pocket twice "When you wear them they break down the fabric of reality and let you see other dimensions... Other, _higher _realities. They're a gateway to an echo of the transcendental experience you've just been through. There's a special time and a special place for you to wear them. They can only be used once, mind you" He added cautiously, "You can only wear them once and then they'll just be normal glasses again"

"So... When do I wear them?" Martin asked as confused as ever. Was he really expecting a straight answer?

"Oh, you'll know the moment, Marty" The Doctor said with a grin. "When the time comes... You'll know"

Martin turned to look once more at the cottage below them. Anya seemed to be placing even more food on a large table that had been set up half way down the garden whilst Ezekiel and Yasmin remained in their seated positions, there faces turned towards where Martin and The Doctor were stood. The two children laughed and played by the lakes edge, their balloons now tied to a branch on a large, golden oak tree.

"Well, I hope you're still hungry, Marty" The Doctor said patting his own stomach gently, "Because Anya looks like she's laying on her own birthday spread!"

Martin gasped in realisation "Of course, 12th July... It's Anya's birthday!"

"Yep, forty today" The Doctor said happily "That's why she's here with the kids... at the old folks house celebrating her fortieth birthday" He smiled at Martin "I thought it'd be a good day for us to drop in on... The Doctor and his little pal Adric calling in to wish her all the best"

"Yes" Martin said softly "It'll be great to see her... And Yasmin... And my _grandkids_... Oh, I can't believe I just said that!"

The Doctor suddenly looped his arm through Martin's. "Shall we go then?" He said excitedly.

Martin nodded and smiled thankfully at The Doctor. "Thank you, Doctor... Thank you for bringing me here"

"Oh, you're very welcome, Adric" He grinned "Best foot forward, then!"

Both men laughed and started to walk at a hurried pace down the hill, towards Ezekiel's cottage and the welcoming warmth of family...

'Dear God,

Why are we living here? What do you want us to do? It's fun being here, but there must be some reason for you putting us here.

Amen, Luke (age 7) -'

'Dear God - Children's letters to God', Carmel Reilly


	30. Chapter 30

**THIRTY**

'Whether you think you can or you think you can't, either way you are right'

- Henry Ford (1863-1947)

Three hours later and Martin was sat in the cottage and around an old, oak table with Ezekiel, Yasmin and Anya who were all still eating delicious, colourful food and enjoying the laughter of children at play outside.

The Doctor was the cause of most of the laughter, as, since coming to the cottage, he had become something of a children's entertainer and the very definition of 'The life and soul of the party'. He had already had four 'proper' water gun fights with the children and was now dancing around the sun-drenched garden, a tartan scarf wrapped around his head, his clothes soaking and dishevelled, pretending to be a 'Mad Old Woman from Timbuktu'. He moved like a drunken giraffe and chased Elijah and Faith as they screamed and giggled with enjoyment.

Martin looked over at Anya who was sat directly opposite him, smiling proudly as she watched, through the large cottage windows, her children at play. She was, Martin thought, _truly_ beautiful. She wore a red and white flowing summer dress and wore very little make up. She didn't need to, it may have been her fortieth birthday today but she looked more like she was in her late twenties. Her shiny, blond hair ran right down her back, as it had done since she was a child, her face was radiantly angelic and her smile elegant and content.

Over the last few hours Martin had learnt that Anya was a singer, an artist and even an actress and was married to a man called Keith whom she described as 'a wonderful soul who loves me like I love him'. She lived in another cottage just under ten miles away and came over to see her Mum and Dad every other day. She loved her life and she loved her kids. She did seem so very happy and at peace with everything and Martin could not have been prouder. His little girl was everything he could dream she would be…

He then looked at Yasmin who was sat on Anya's right sipping at a hot cup of tea and occasionally tittering with laughter at The Doctor's antics outside. Martin had worked out she must be over seventy but, like her daughter, age had only made her look more beautiful. She was wearing a grey and black shawl that was wrapped around a light blue dress. Her features were largely unchanged from how Martin knew her, only her hair colour had really altered to a light, grey colour, and he found it hard to believe thirty-five years had passed since he had last seen her. Her eyes remained completely unchanged: light blue, deep and beyond beautiful. It was so good to see her looking so healthy in this far future as, in his own time, Yasmin had gone through a lot of difficult health problems and Martin had seen her in pain more times than he would wish to remember. He'd always worried about her and had prayed for her health on many occasions over the years. To see her now, looking pain free and ageless, was one of the greatest gifts he could ever wish for…

He then looked at Ezekiel… His _own_ future self, who was sat at the 'head' of the table, his back to a blackened, unlit fireplace. The old man was also looking out of the window totally engrossed by The Doctor's latest adventure. Martin studied the old man's face: He looked extremely healthy for his age and was neither skinny nor over weight. He was totally bald but held on to a clutch of brown and grey hair on his chin. He had bright, twinkling eyes and an infectious grin but most of all, Martin thought, he could see his own, unmistakable face right there in front him.

There was no denying it. This was definitely _him_ in the future. This was definitely Yasmin and Anya. And, here he was, sat with them in his own dream cottage in the lakes in 2045.

How did he end up here?

On first approaching the cottage three hours earlier The Doctor had led the way and, after confidently striding through the garden gate, he had hugged each one of the family in turn as if he was a long lost relative returning from a distant journey. He introduced Martin as "Adric… A friend of mine from a place called Alzarius, a bit of a mathematician and an all round nice chap! He also a 'Truth' seeker!" Each of the family had nodded their 'Hello's' in Martin's direction and then casually resumed their party.

When The Doctor introduced Martin to Ezekiel the old man had simply hugged him warmly and whispered in his ear "We'll talk later". They'd offered him food and all made him feel most welcome and Martin could tell that they were all expecting him to be there…

After pre-contact 'advice' from The Doctor, 'Adric's story' was that he'd got a bad throat from a recent mild case of 'Sontaran swine flu' and therefore wasn't up for talking much. This way it helped Martin relax first and enjoy just listening to others rather than rushing in full steam with a billion questions and worrying about 'temporal paradoxes'. It also avoided any un-wanted questions from Yasmin or Anya and saved Martin from having to think too much about a 'back story' for 'Adric'.

"There's going to be plenty of time for questions in the days ahead, Marty" The Doctor had whispered, "Just enjoy today and relax, ok?"

So Martin did. For the first hour and a half, he sat on a blanket in the garden in silence mainly watching The Doctor crack jokes, perform magic tricks, have 'proper' water fights and even sing at one point. He really was a one-man show and all of Ezekiel's family seemed to just _love_ his company and generally _adore _him. The children were so at ease with him, like they'd known him all their lives…

Minutes after The Doctor had sung an energetic version of 'Happy Birthday to you' for her, Anya had brought Martin some food and a drink and even sat with him making polite, one-way conversation. He thought he'd better say at least something at one point, but he was so nervous to even talk to her he just muttered "Bad… Throat… Hurt…" in a pathetic, obviously put on voice to which she simply smiled politely and excused herself to go and make a drink.

Ezekiel had remained in his deck chair for most of the afternoon, often bursting into song or laughing loudly at the performing Doctor, before standing up suddenly and exclaiming "My bum's going numb sitting on this deck chair! Who fancies going inside?"

All four adults had made their way inside the hard stone cottage whilst The Doctor and the children remained in the garden. "Time for another water gun fight, me thinks!" The Doctor had shouted excitedly. "Who's the Daleks and who's the Cybermen this time?" The children's amused screams indicated when the battle had commenced…

Ezekiel's cottage was simply perfect. Although it was a relatively new building, it was built to look old and 'lived in'. Intricate, thick wooden beams lined the ceilings and bronze/golden ornaments occupied the tables and sideboards. Rich, colourful tapestries hung from the walls and the welcoming smell of home cooking filled the air.

On entering the main living room Martin had noticed the blackened fireplace straight away and had headed for one of the three armchairs seated in the area in front of it. Above the fireplace hung an old, black leather bound book encased in a wooden frame, its title written in faded gold: It said simply…'The Truth'. He had first seen the book over an hour ago now but here Martin was, sat looking at the book hanging above his future self's head and wondering what part it would play in the days to come…

"You'll find out about the book later tonight, Adric" Ezekiel said after noticing Martin's transfixed stare. "It's the reason you're here," He'd added before putting a hand over his own mouth as if to stop himself speaking. "Later…" He repeated, "We'll talk later"…

Martin nodded and smiled back…

Three hours later and the house was quiet. Anya had taken the exhausted children home with a promise to call around over tomorrow to see how Adric was settling in and whether his throat was any better. Yasmin had gone to bed early as she was half way through a good book and wanted to finish reading it before the end of the week so she could pick up a new one from the market on Monday. She liked to read and every book was a journey…

Martin was resting in the most comfortable armchair he had ever sat in. Its high back offered totally head support and soft, plump cushions seemed to shape themselves to his very body, making him feel more relaxed than he had for years. He stared up at the black book hanging above the fireplace. What was in 'The Truth'?

"You've been looking for the Truth for years, Marty" The Doctor's voice broke the silence as always. "Who'd have thought you'd find it hanging above a fireplace in your own future home?"

Martin said nothing but smiled politely at The Doctor. All he could do was wonder when he could see inside the book…

Ezekiel was stood in front of the unlit fire; his back to the book whilst The Doctor was slumped in the armchair nearest to the fireplace looking exhausted but pleased with himself. He sipped on a glass of iced water and sank further back in the chair.

"Oh, I've had fun today, Zeeky" He said appreciatively, "It's been great seeing everyone again and just fantastic to see this plan come together" He looked at Martin and then Ezekiel with a slight, knowing grin. "Ahhh… Look at us…The Doctor, Ezekiel and Adric…Here we all are then…and not a Martin in sight!"

"Indeed" said Ezekiel softly, "Oh, I remember this bit so well" He smiled and turned to look at Martin with a look of understanding pity. "I remember wanting to scream 'WHY AM I HERE!' at this point but I managed to…"

"Why am I here?" Martin 'semi-shouted' with a grin, as he didn't want to disturb Yasmin upstairs. "There, I said it! Has that altered the time lines, then, now that I've done that? Has that changed how things are going to _be_?"

"No, because I was about to say... I wanted to scream it out but I managed to settle for semi shouting it instead" Ezekiel laughed as he spoke. "You can't _alter_ anything, Martin. My memory of everything that happens will be exactly what does happen because this has all happened before… For me it has at least… I _was _you… Sat there… Listening to me saying these words. It was the beginning of a whole new world for me, a whole new cycle of events and a truthful way of understanding life. This moment was a gift. One of many you have already received. And I am so pleased that I can, at last, give myself this gift"

Martin looked up at the book above the fireplace. "Is this why I'm here?" He nodded up at the book. "You're going to give me the book… The book with secrets and truth in… '_The _Truth'… And I'm going to read it and take it back with me, is that it?" He looked up at his future self with eyes pleading for it to be that simple.

"Oh no, Martin, the book stays where it is" Ezekiel's voice was low and soft, "In fact, that book never moves from its mount" He stood directly in front of it staring knowingly into it's dark, leather cover. "You're not here to read it… It's quite the opposite really… You're here to write it". He then bent down slowly to pick up a book like parcel that was placed on the floor by the side of the third, vacant armchair. He used his black walking stick to straighten himself up again and handed the large square envelope to Martin. "This is for you, Martin," He said proudly. "This will be your life's work from now on and the building blocks of a whole new world" He smiled calmly at Martin and exchanged a look with The Doctor.

Martin ripped open the envelope and drew out the contents. It was a black, leather bound book the exact same size as the one on the wall. But it was brand new with not a mark upon it and its pages were bright white and untouched.

"Here's the plan, Marty... You're going to stay here with Ezekiel and you're going to write down the secrets of creation once and for all" It was The Doctor speaking now, he had sat up straighter in his seat. "Ezekiel is going to _tell _you what's in the book and you're going to write it down. It'll be like taking diction _and _like talking to your self all at the same time. You'll _both _write the book together. This book will hold the secrets of life wrapped inside the truth of all things and it will create a gateway for mankind to ascend to the next level of spirituality is so greatly needs. It'll save the world and create this magical, peaceful future. It'll be the most important book ever written… And you're going to write it"

Martin's head was spinning "But Ezekiel's going to be telling me _what _to write?"

"Yeah…"

"But he only knows what's in the book because he's read it before?"

"Well, he _wrote_ it, didn't he!" The Doctor said pointing at the pair of them at the same time. "He's you, remember?"

"Yeah, but… Where did the words come from in the first place? If he's just remembering what he's read in the book and I'm transcribing what he's read… How can that happen?" Martin was literally shaking his head in confusion. "Who came up with the words in the first place?"

"Oh, it's a paradox, Marty" The Doctor said dismissively, "Don't worry about it…You'll give yourself a nose bleed!" He threw Martin a bit of tissue as if anticipating it happening soon. "The point is… It works! This whole plan works! The secrets are written down… The Truth is bound in the book… You take it back to your time… You help save the world with it… Humanity elevates to its next spiritual rung on the cosmic ladder…We build this cottage… You put the book above the fireplace and then we eventually buy you a brand new book to write the secrets down all over again. It's a paradox. It's one of the great circles of life…"

Martin felt his older self put a hand on his shoulder "It does work, Martin. We discover the Secrets of life together and _through_ and _in_ each other. We have many months of inner journeys ahead…A time of deep thought and quiet contemplation whilst we write down the Truth of all things... And we have the best time of our lives" He added with a meaningful smile.

"But what about _my own _Yasmin and Anya. If I'm here for months, wont they miss me?" Martin looked at The Doctor for the answer.

"Oh, Marty, do catch up!" The Doctor said impatiently. "I've got a _time_ machine, haven't I? I can come back and pick you up and drop you off back in that churchyard where I first met you seconds after we left it. Don't worry about that! Everything's sorted!" he said with complete confidence. "I'll come back for you in about a couple of months when the book's written!"

"What? Are you not staying here with me?" Martin asked with only a slight hint of worry.

"No, of course I'm not!" The Doctor said sitting bolt upright in his chair. "I've got to be off! I've got monsters to fight, haven't I? That's what I do! I've heard there's a bit of a skirmish going on between the Draconians and the dwarf headed Pumble Snatchers. I better go sort them out before things get nasty!" He said with a grin. "You'll be alright here wont you? I thought you'd be pleased to stay?" His eyebrows were raised.

"Oh yes, I am" Martin said taking the idea in. "I'm very happy here… with myself" He glanced at Ezekiel and smiled. "I can see this is where I belong… This is my home… I can feel it in my soul…" Martin rested his head back in his seat and pushed his body deep within its padded comfort.

"Good, good" Ezekiel said happily, "We'll get started in the morning then. I'm looking forward to it myself. I remember it been _the_ most amazingly positive experience of my life! I loved every second… Well, that is apart from right at the end when..." He stopped himself talking, his face suddenly sombre for the first time. He glanced at The Doctor who returned his gaze with understanding nod. Ezekiel then turned, grabbed his walking stick and headed towards the kitchen. "Anyone fancy a cup of tea?"

"This'll have to be my last one and then I've really got to get going!" The Doctor said as if his arm was been physically twisted, "I promised Gandhi a game of 'scrabble' before the night was out and I don't want to be too late. You know what his temper is like!"

"What about you, Martin?" Ezekiel had reached the kitchen. "Do you want a drink?"

Martin made no sound.

"Martin?"

The Doctor turned to see Martin's sleeping form. "It looks like Martin's out for the count, Zeeky. I would say he needed the sleep but that's not strictly true. He's been asleep in one of the TARDIS' backrooms for God knows how long! But look at him again… Sleeping like a little field mouse. It's maybe the after effects of the temporal shift… Or maybe just too much birthday cake!"

Ezekiel walked back into the sitting area and looked over at Martin's hibernating body once more. The exhausted man was clutching onto his new, unwritten book holding it tight to his chest, a look of complete calm on his face.

"I should have known he wasn't going to have a cup of tea, shouldn't I?" Ezekiel said, more to himself than anybody else. "But, then again, I don't remember what happened 'cos I feel asleep, didn't I?"

The Doctor laughed and delved into his jacket pocket for another jammy dodger...

'All that we are is a result of what we have thought'

- The Buddha (563 BCE- 483 BCE)


	31. Chapter 31

**THIRTY-ONE**

'When the ten thousand things become One,

Then we return to the center,

Where we have always been'

Chuang-Tse

Martin awoke with a start as if he'd just had his legs kicked out from underneath him. At first he breathed heavy and quickly, his eyes darting around trying to make out his surroundings. He then slowly started to calm himself as he realised he was in no _immediate_ danger…

He was still in Ezekiel's cottage, in the armchair he had fallen asleep in, a warm green blanket had been placed around him but now he was totally alone. The room was dark, lit only by shafts of moonlight and a single candle that stood, still burning, on the fireplace. Focusing in on the candle Martin soon noticed a white piece of folded paper placed beside it, a name had been hand written on it in black ink:

'Martin'.

Pushing himself up from his chair at the same time as holding on to his blanket, Martin shuffled slowly over to the mantel and took the paper. He unfolded it and, using the candlelight, began to read:

"Dear Marty,

I didn't want to wake you 'cos I think you needed the sleep, but just to let you know... I've gone.

By the time you read this, I'll probably be in 1958 getting my backside beaten at 'Scrabble' by a cute, little skinny bloke… Who knows? Maybe I'm in the 49th century and a prisoner of the evil Gastropods… But don't worry, they're rubbish monsters so I'll soon have them defeated!

What I'm basically saying is I'm not going to be around for a bit. I'll be back to pick you up in a couple of months when the book is finished and you're ready to be taken home. I already know the time and the place for when we meet up so don't worry. I know I'm there. I've already seen it. We've had all this planned for ages. This was all your idea, remember?

Have fun with Ezekiel. Enjoy the process of creation when you write the book, remember everything you already know, speak truthfully, always with an open heart, listen to Ezekiel and whatever you do, in fact most importantly, DON'T ever eat any of his cheese and chutney sandwiches! He's sssoooooo protective over them! Make your own! Ok?

I'll see you on the last day… by the tree at the end of the dream…

Love and stuff

The Doctor

PS: There's a bed been made for you upstairs. Second door on the left. Go get some more sleep. You're going to need it… Zeeky will have you up and about at the crack of dawn!

PPS: Don't forget those glasses I gave you. Keep them with you always. You'll know when to use them.

PPPS: Lay off the cake, Fatty...

PPPPS: Byeeeeee…..

There was even a little hand drawing at the end of the letter of a bow tie wearing stick man running towards a tall, dark box.

Martin smiled, folded the letter up and placed it back on the mantel. He then looked over at the red-carpeted staircase, a golden light shone warmly at the top of it. Still smiling to himself, the tired, half asleep man pulled his blanket tighter around his shoulders and made his way towards the stairs…

"Wakey, wakey!" A man's voice suddenly bellowed. "It's a beautiful day and we've got a book to write!"

It was Ezekiel. He was carrying a tray on which stood a breakfast of piping hot beans on toast and a mug of sweet tea. He placed it down on the bed beside Martin and strode over to the drawn curtains, flinging them open and thus allowing powerful rays of piercing light to engulf the room.

"Look at that!" The old man said appreciatively staring out of the sun-drenched window. He breathed in long and hard and allowed the natural light to caress his aging body. He let out a long, thankful breath. "Ahhh… Morning sunlight, Martin. One of the most purifying, positive energies you should _always_ allow your body to embrace whenever possible. High in vitamin D, you know. It's true. Look it up"

He looked around at Martin's bed to see his younger self pulling the duvet cover further over his head in an effort to hide from the light of morning.

"Now come on, lazy… Let's start as we mean to go on" Ezekiel sat down on the bed and picked up the tray once more. "I've made you breakfast… Just like The Doctor used to… But now it's just you and me… Now we face the day… And we _seize_ it"

Martin emerged at last, blinking from his bed covers. He smiled at the old man who returned the gesture whilst handing over the breakfast.

"Thank you" Martin said in a broken, 'morning' voice.

"You're welcome" The older man responded gently. He then stood up and turned to move towards the door. "I'll let you eat and get dressed. There's a shower over the hallway so get yourself all freshened up too, if you like. I'll meet you downstairs in… Shall we say 30 minutes?" He looked at Martin expectedly.

"Yeah, I mean… What time is it now?" Martin groggily looked around the bedroom for a clock but could not see one anywhere.

"It's…ahhh.. 6.08am" Ezekiel said looking at his wristwatch.

"Bloody hell" Martin said laughing. "Whatever happened to the days of me enjoying a good sleep in?"

Ezekiel laughed too "They disappeared when I learnt the secret of life. Who would want to be in bed when life can be embraced and each moment savoured in it's perfection? Don't you worry, Martin. I'll soon have you out of that bed and losing some of that stomach so you'll _literally_ go home a new man both physically _and_ spiritually. That's why you're here, remember?"

Martin shrugged. "Well, I didn't really know I was here to lose weight!" He said sarcastically.

"You're not," Ezekiel tapped his own slim stomach. "You're here to save the world and live in the eternal moment of 'Now'… Losing weight is just an added bonus, that's all" He smiled happily at Martin and made for the door. "A healthy mind is a healthy body… Just eat when you're hungry and stop when you're full… I'll see you downstairs… And then we are going for a nice walk and start work on chapter one…" He grinned happily and then disappeared from the room.

Martin let out a laugh and took his first mouthful of beans on toast…

Forty-five minutes later and the two men that were really One were heading out of the cottage door and down towards the lakeside. The air was cool, yet vibrant and the ground was soft and inviting. Birdsong filled the air, mixed with sound of sheep bleating and the taping from the gentle breeze that stroked the nearby trees. Ezekiel confidentially led the way. Even with his black walking stick clutched in his right hand he still set quite a pace. Martin followed the old man's footsteps until they reached the waters edge.

Ezekiel suddenly paused and looked around the tranquil scenery of his own garden. "Yes, this looks like a good spot for today" he said nodding contently.

"What?" Martin was taken aback, his head turning backwards to the cottage, which was all of just two hundred yards away. "I thought we were going to be walking for miles? Seeing the views, that sort of thing?"

"No…" Ezekiel said dismissively and then sat down on a large tree stump. "Always begin at home, Martin. Stay centred. Always start with what is closest to you… And _then_ we can go from there. Each day we'll progress a little more" He looked at Martin's back and at the rucksack he was carrying. "Have you got the book in there?"

Martin nodded.

"Then I think it's time to get it out… This is how it begins"

Without saying a word, Martin took the rucksack from his shoulder and placed it on the ground next to the tree stump. He then set up his folded chair and moved it so he was opposite to his older self. He sat down in it heavily and reached over to take the unwritten book from his bag. He lifted the book carefully, placed it on his knees and then sat back in the chair, reaching inside his jacket pocket for his pen. He drew out the pen, opened the book and starred intently at the first blank, white page…

What was he _supposed_ to write?

After a moment he looked up to see Ezekiel looking directly at him. The smile on the old man's face was calm, confident and reassuring. But after a few more moments Martin could stand the silence no longer…

"How does it start? What are the first words? Do you remember?" Martin looked intently into his future self's eyes as if by staring as hard as he could, he could somehow draw the secrets out of him.

"I think the question is…Do _you_ remember?" Ezekiel leaned forward. "Do you remember what happened to you immediately before you came here to this time?"

"What do you mean?"

"Do you remember the revelations you've _already_ had? The transcendental journey you took? The Truth that you have learnt?" His voice lowered as he leaned in closer to Martin. "Do you remember the love and the oneness of God? And how it _felt_ to _understand_ it all?"

Martin thought back to his most recent experience with The Doctor and Jay inside the TARDIS. His memory did seem strangely foggy as if parts of it were almost hidden from him. He knew he'd already forgotten so much…

But as he thought back, he _did_ remember the words the 'Book of Life' brought him, the Love 'Jay' spoke of, the astral flight he took through infinity and the revelation of God and Truth he felt in his heart and every fibre of his being.

"Yes… I do… I remember…" He said quietly.

"Well, those are the words we need to hear now" Ezekiel grinned knowingly at Martin's still confused expression. "Don't worry… I'll help you remember more"

Martin looked down in the book. "But how does it begin? I've no idea what the first line could be…"

Ezekiel put a finger to his own lips and 'shhh-ed' Martin silent. He pointed all around him at the trees and the mountains surrounding them. He pointed at the grass and the lake, then at the sky and the clouds _in_ the sky. He opened his arms out wide as if acknowledging the whole of creation and the very universe itself. He then pointed at himself and then, finally, at Martin…

And then he smiled the most perfect smile that ever existed.

Martin returned the smile as best he could and put the tip of his pen to the book…

"Beautiful, isn't it?"

Ezekiel told him The Secret and Martin wrote The Truth down in his book…

And so it began.

Each day Ezekiel would wake Martin just after dawn and the two of them would enjoy breakfast together before venturing out into their perfect, future world. With each passing day they would walk further away from the cottage and deeper into the tranquil serenity of their surroundings and deeper still into themselves and their own, inspired thoughts. With each passing day Martin learned the Truth of all existence and the secrets of life were written down at last for all to see…

He wrote of the Chakras, the energy centres that run through the human body. He wrote of the power of positive thought and of the law of attraction. They spoke about time and how all things were happening right here and now. They spoke about love: the binding force of the universe. They spoke about God: That which contains all things...

Ezekiel told him The Secret and Martin wrote The Truth down in his book…

By the second week the duo were reaching yet further and further out into the majestic country side... at the same time as reaching further and further into the universe of treasures inside of them. 'The Truth' was been captured in the book and the key to existence itself was slowly been turned...

On the Wednesday morning of August 15th 2045 on one of their daily walks, Martin and Ezekiel were coming to a fork in the path they had often passed during the last few weeks. To the left was the 'main' route, signified by it's well trodden path, and to the right was a narrower way almost over run with thick bushes. In the middle of the parting of ways stood a large, ancient oak tree, its tangled body covered by a maze of dark green leaves. On previous journeys down this way, Martin had often looked off to the right path and wondered where it might lead but Ezekiel had always chosen the left route. Maybe it was time for a change...

"Shall will go this way today?" Martin nodded off to the right.

Ezekiel stopped suddenly and, as he was following the old man at quite a close distance, Martin almost walked into the back of him. The older man stared off to the right hand turn as if looking at it for the very first time.

"To the right, you mean?" Ezekiel said almost nervously.

"Yeah... I just thought... Well, we never go down that way, do we?" Martin was frowning at Ezekiel's apparent concern.

"No, no... We don't, do we..." The old man looked at Martin with an almost pitying expression. "And there's a reason for that"

"Why?"

"Well, because I _never_ go down there" Ezekiel said matter-of-factly.

Martin laughed "Yeah, but why?"

The older man looked at his younger self once more, his face torn between sadness and inevitability. "Well, I've only been down that way _once_ before... And it didn't end well, really" He stared off thoughtfully past the mountains on the right hand side of the great oak tree as if remembering some long, almost forgotten time. "Well, it _did_ end well... in a way... it _was_ beautiful... but it was sad... very sad... and..." He suddenly reverted his gaze to Martin and then down at his own feet. "We don't really talk about this now" he added dismissively before suddenly continuing his stride towards the left path.

"What?" Martin remained where he was, staring hard at the back of Ezekiel's departing figure. "What do you mean 'we don't talk about it'? Talk about what? We're supposed to be talking Truth here, aren't we? Writing down the Truth of all things? Surely, there are no secrets here? Can't I know the Truth about that way? What's over there? What did you see?"

"I said we don't talk about it _now, _Martin" Ezekiel carried on walking not looking back. "It didn't happen like this... You find out later... in just a few weeks time, in fact"

"No, Ezekiel... I don't want to find out later... I want to find out now!" Martin stood his ground. "What's down there?"

Ezekiel stopped walking, bowed his head and remained still facing away from Martin. "I knew this wasn't going to be easy," he said softly, almost to himself. "Ok, Martin. This is all I can tell you _now_..." He spun on his heals and turned to face the younger man. "I only ever went down there once... And it was when I was _you, _as you are now I mean, and you were with _me_, as _I _am now. As I said, it happens in a few weeks time... And it's the _first _and _only_ time we go down that path"

"Why?" Martin was too intrigued to leave it at that. "What's down there?" He returned his eyes to the inviting path; the leaves on the bushes were swaying in a way that was almost beckoning him over.

"Oh, there's nothing 'down there', as such... Well, just a few lovely fields set against a backdrop of perfect mountains. There's also a beautiful, strolling hill with a majestic ash tree on top of it... so it's hardly nothing… I'm not saying it's _nothing_…" Ezekiel walked back towards where Martin was stood. "It's not _what's_ down there... It's more a case of what _happens _down there" He then braced himself for the next question.

"Why? What happens down there?" Martin asked on cue.

"I can't tell you that, Martin," He said without a hint of concern or regret. "Something wonderful... Something heart breaking. That is really all I can tell you"

"But _why_ can't you tell me?" Martin's eyes pleaded with his future self.

"Because I _don't_... I don't tell you. It's as simple as that. I walk on now... and you follow... And you don't find out until the day it happens" He turned his back and started to walk once more down his preferred, left path. "That's just the way events transpire, I'm afraid"

Martin remained where he was. "Well, what if I don't follow you? What if I stand here and let you walk on your own? What then?" He folded his arms as if to show his rebellion. "What happens then, Ezekiel?"

Without looking around, the old man carried on his advance and waved an arm in the air. "I'll see you in five minutes at the top of the next hill by that patch of rocks we like" He said calmly.

"I wont be there!" Martin responded sternly.

"Oh, you will" Ezekiel laughed lightly. "You'll be upset for half an hour, then you'll forget all about it whilst we have our sandwiches and talk about the Tree of Life and it's connection to the Eternal moment of Creation. Then, eventually, we write another, Truth-filled chapter in the book and get back to the cottage in time for fish and chips!" He raised his voice to compensate for the increasing distance between him and his younger self.

"No we wont" Martin sat on the ground beneath the great oak tree and started to pick at grass beneath him. "I'm staying here till you come back and tell me what you're hiding from me"

"Oh, ok" Ezekiel laughed "I'll see you in five..." His voice disappeared into the wind.

"I mean it, you know" Martin hadn't given up. "I'm not going to move on this!" He watched as Ezekiel's departing figure slowly disappeared behind a collection of small tress. "Ezekiel?" He shouted. "Ezekiel are you listening to me?"

Silence.

"Ezekiel?" Martin tried again. Shaking his head in frustration, Martin raised himself from the ground and looked at either side of him at the two paths he could choose: The narrow, right path or the well-trodden left path.

Which path should he take?

Letting out a heavy sigh, the younger man picked up his bag and begrudgingly followed the path his future self had just taken.

"Ezekiel? Ezekiel! Wait for me!"...

Each night, upon their return from their journeys, Yasmin would make a beautifully cooked meal and all three of them would sit down at the large, oak table and eat together. Discussing all manor of topics, ranging from the oneness of all life to what constituted the most dunkable biscuit and just about everything in-between, the trio _literally_ put the world to rights. Martin would often find himself writing in the book as they spoke; sometimes even unaware he was doing so. It could be said that the book almost wrote itself…

Long into the night Martin and Ezekiel would talk about the book and all the secrets it would, and already did, contain. They spoke of religions, the divisions and hatefulness they can sometimes cause and yet they also spoke of the One Truth that is contained in _all_ of them. They spoke of 'belief' been the root of all human behaviour and the paradox of the vengeful, jealous God. They spoke of peace and how it was achievable through the knowledge of The Truth contained in the book. They spoke of, and displayed for each other, Unconditional Love: the essence of God and the primal force of the Universe itself.

Ezekiel told him The Secret and Martin wrote The Truth down in his book…

By the fifth week the book was already half written. Ezekiel would often spend the first half and hour of each morning 'proof reading' Martin's work, correcting parts here and there with a thin, red pen. He didn't have to correct very much. The Truth contained within was blinding in its simplicity yet it left no room for doubt or error. The book was all he knew it would be… A container for The Truth of all things…

"It's going well, Martin" Ezekiel nodded encouragingly at his younger self as he closed the book up. "Everything's going according to plan and exactly as I remember it. We'll soon have the book finished and then…" His voice trailed off as if he was lost in thought.

"Then what?" Martin said, his mouthful of bran flakes. He was sat at the breakfast table, consciously eating his food.

"Thennnn you go home… Back to your time. You take the book back with you… And save the world" Ezekiel said assuredly.

"Oh, simple as that, eh?" Martin responded sarcastically.

"Well, maybe not quite as simple as that but that's the general idea" The old man beamed. "It works, Martin. Believe me. It works!" Before Martin could respond Ezekiel grabbed his black walking stick and headed for the door. "C'mon then, lets get going… We're going to talk about global warming, solar power and the consequences of free energy for everyone today! It's not a day to be sat around munching on bran flakes and talking about the last day!" He disappeared from Martin's view.

"He gets more and more like The Doctor every second…" Martin said to himself as he took once last gulp of tea, grabbed his rucksack and headed for the door…

The book drew nearer to completion with every passing day. Their words were inspired by their connected experience and their ability to remember, and express, The Truth within them. They spoke of collective consciousness and it's ability to affect the world on a global scale. They spoke of prayer and psychic phenomena and wrote of the Truth about karma and how all things are created from within. They explained the Divine Dichotomy, an experience within which two apparently contradictory truths can exist in the same place at the same time, and thus explained the Miracle of God's connection to all life: 'We are One… We are Many"…

Ezekiel told him The Truth and Martin wrote The Secret down in his book…

On Wednesday 2nd September 2045 at approximately 7.55pm Martin was in his bedroom drawing on an A4 pad he'd found in the cupboard by his bed. He liked to draw, it was one of the only things he was good at at school and, at this present time, he was nearing completion of his latest masterpiece: A picture of The Doctor, the 'bow tie wearing' Doctor, stood beside his TARDIS which was, in turn, surrounding by planetary spheres and distant constellations. Originally he had contemplated drawing the 'other' Doctor: the first one he'd met in the graveyard all that time ago but, upon reflection, he decided he liked _this_ 'new' Doctor better. This one was friendlier, more charming, younger looking and a little less condescending. He was still very hard to draw, though…

Raising his head from his artwork Martin looked out of his window at the evening sky. It was still light outside, but tiny stars were starting to make their first appearance in the evening sky. Gazing at their ancient light Martin wondered if The Doctor was anywhere near those very stars. He imagined him now been chased down endless corridors by indescribable monsters, waving his sonic screwdriver around like it was some sort of magic wand, at the same time as making wise cracks about the state of the ventilation shafts whilst contemplating how to reverse a tacheon displacement.

Thinking about The Doctor made Martin smile. He missed him…

It was just then he heard voices outside. Narrowing his eyes, he looked around to see if he could spot who was talking. He focused in on the left hand side of the garden and saw two figures stood underneath a birch tree perhaps about fifty yards away. The leaves from the tree hid their faces at first, but the ever-increasing wind soon helped reveal their identities: It was Ezekiel and The Doctor both deep in conversation.

Martin's initial reaction was to shout out to them but then he stopped himself as if suddenly realising that maybe they didn't _want_ him to know they were there. They did seem almost huddled together as if in 'secret conversation' and Ezekiel looked sad, Martin thought. Staying where he was, Martin tried to listen in, but he couldn't quite hear the exact words been spoken. The Doctor kept resting a hand on Ezekiel's shoulder, as if he was comforting him. Then the time traveller reached into his inside jacket pocket and gave Ezekiel what looked like a photograph, which the old man took appreciatively. He seemed to stare into it as if the image contained upon it was the most sacred object in existence.

Martin squinted his eyes to try and make out even a hint of what was on the photograph but he was too far away. If only he had some binoculars or some high powered sci-fi glasses or…

Glasses?

He immediately thought of the glasses The Doctor had given him when they first arrived in this time zone. The Doctor had said that he'd know when to use them. Maybe this was the time? Maybe he was _meant_ to see what was on the photograph and the glasses made that possible? Maybe _this_ was part of the plan?

He looked over at the bedroom door where his jacket was hanging. He darted over to it, reached inside the inner pocket and took out the dark, brown spectacle case. Opening it hurriedly, the first thing he saw was a white sheet of folded paper resting on top of the glasses. On the paper, in The Doctor's handwriting, was Martin's name. Taking the paper out, he then closed the case back up and placed it gently down on the bedside cabinet. He walked back over to the window, checked to see if Ezekiel and The Doctor were still there (which they were), slowly unfolded the paper and began to read:

Dear Martin,

Hands off the glasses! Now is NOT the time to use them. They're for seeing into other dimensions and breaking down the fabric of reality… Not for spying on me and Zeeky in the garden with like they're some cheap 'Argos' toy! Shame on you!

Martin looked up from the page and then outside at the still talking figures at the bottom of the garden. They both seemed blissfully unaware that he was watching them. He looked back down at the page…

And don't think we don't know you're watching us right now, either!

Martin looked up again and focused in on The Doctor's hand, which was waving a tiny 'hello' in his direction as the time traveller continued to face Ezekiel, their eyes locked together, still deep in conversation.

There's no fooling us, Marty. We know everything! That's the whole point, really…

Martin let out a reluctant laugh and continued reading…

I'm just here preparing Ezekiel for the days to come. That's all. We're all in this together, remember? We're approaching your final day here and things need to be put into place. That's why I'm here now…

But I cant stay so don't come out and see me, ok? That doesn't happen. You just stay in your room and work on your drawing (I'm very flattered, by the way… But you really do need to work on my nose!)

I'll be back for you on the last day… I'll be there when you need me.

Love and stuff

The Doctor

PS: The book is coming along great. I love chapter 7… very exciting. Looking forward to reading it when it's all finished…

PPS: Don't ask how this letter got in the spectacle case. It's all very clever and timey wimey. And the great thing is… It was all _your_ idea!

PPPS: You look outside now…

Martin looked outside of his window. At the bottom of the garden Ezekiel now stood all alone, his back still to Martin. The old man's shoulders looked slumped and almost dejected, as he seemed to be staring off and out across the lake, deep within his own thoughts. The Doctor, and the 'photograph', were nowhere to be seen…

Suddenly a wheezing, groaning sound could be heard to the right hand side of the house. Martin shifted his position to get a better look just in time to see the Doctor's TARDIS dematerialising, it's deep blue form slowly fading as the light on it's roof pulsed in time with the sound of it's engines. Within seconds it had gone, leaving only a trail of blowing leaves in its wake.

Smiling with fascination and wonder, Martin looked back over to where his older self was standing. The old man was now facing Martin, although not looking directly at him but seeing Ezekiel as he was now made Martin's face soon fall. His future self looked older than Martin had ever seen him and his eyes were puffed out and shining with tears.

At that moment, Ezekiel suddenly looked up and saw his younger self staring at him. Their eyes met for a brief second before Martin averted his gaze and attempted to hide himself behind his bedroom curtain.

"It's ok, Martin… I know you're there" Ezekiel called out "_Obviously_, I know you're there" He added softly, as if to himself. "You don't have to worry about a thing… I'm fine. Everything is going according to plan"

Martin came out from behind his curtain and looked down at the older man. "Then why are you crying?" He asked with genuine concern.

Ezekiel grunted and, with the aid of his walking stick, began walking slowly back to the front door of his house. "Oh, I've been cutting onions… I've got hay fever… And The Doctor's just told me a sad story… There was a picture and everything…. But that's not important right now" He said dismissively. "Don't worry," he added as he reached the door. "Please don't let any of this bother you in any way" He looked up into the eyes of his younger self "It'll soon be the last day… and then we can all go home" He smiled at Martin for a brief second, then pushed at the front door and entered.

"What happens on the last day?" Martin said as Ezekiel disappeared from view.

A muffled voice from downstairs rung through Martin's bedroom floor. "I've just told you… We all go home"

"But you already _are_ home" Martin said softly, almost to himself. He knew he wouldn't get a reply.

Walking over to his bad, Martin picked up his drawing pad and looked intently at his still incomplete masterpiece. The Doctor was right as always: he hadn't got his nose 'right' at all. He smiled at the expression he had drawn on The Doctor's face which looked somewhere between shock and complete apathy.

"Oh, Doctor…" he said to the drawing, "Where is all this going to end?"

Still smiling, he sat down on the edge of his bed, picked up his pencil and continued to draw…

'If you bring forth what is inside you,

What you bring forth will save you.

If you do not bring forth what is inside you,

What you do not bring forth will destroy you'

- The Gospel of Thomas


	32. Chapter 32

**THIRTY-TWO**

"I believe you create your own destiny. You chose it every day.

For me, one of the most important ideas is that you can begin again.

The ability to start again is enshrined in any worthy philosophy.

Putting the past behind you doesn't always mean ignoring the past,

but learning from it and moving on…"

Bono from an extract taken from 'Ten Eternal Questions' by Zoe Sallis

8.30pm Thursday 10th Sept 2045: On the side of a hill near Hawkshead, Cumbria:

"So, what do you think?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well… What do you think to it all soon far?"

"I..."

"And... Don't say 'rubbish'!"

"I... I think it's… incredible…"

Martin and Ezekiel were lying on their backs on a patch of soft, dry grass looking upwards, and outwards, into the clear, twilight sky. The evening was cool, yet comfortable as they lay taking in the awe-inspiring sight of the solar system on proud display. The majesty of chaos and perfection that made up the very fabric of the universe danced before their open eyes. The stars graced the heavens serenely, their light giving warmth and life to countless worlds in the vast infinity of all creation, their very existence a source of wonder, study and debate for mankind since dawn of known time.

And here the two men who were really One lay: their backs on the cold, hard ground. Looking out into the tapestry of the cosmos whilst pulling together the threads of existence itself, locking them into words and binding 'The Truth' in a leather-bound book.

The book itself was nearing completion and was, Martin had concluded, around three chapters away from the journey's end.

"It's incredible" Martin repeated with a whisper.

"Now… are we taking about the universe… or the book so far?" Ezekiel said casually sucking on a cough sweet and glancing around to look at Martin.

"Well… both really" Martin said with a smile. "They're both very much a work in progress"

"Of course they are" Ezekiel chuckled happily and then reverted his gaze upwards. He was silent for a few moments as he clasped both of his hands together and rested them on his chest contently. He then let out a long, appreciative breath and said softly, "We're really looking back in time, you know, looking at those stars. They're so far away the light we're seeing now is actually from the 'past'... It's taken so long to get here..."

"Yeah, I know" Martin said in his best 'I'm not five!' voice.

Ezekiel scratched at his nose for a second and carried on "But, then again, 'time' doesn't exist in ultimate reality because, as we've already learned, all that does exist is the here and the now... The Eternal Moment of Creation... So where does that leave us? How can that be?" He shook his head as if to clear his thoughts.

"Well, it's one of those 'divine dichotomies', isn't it?" Martin said casually. "One of those moments where two apparently contradictory truths can stand side by side and _both_ be true... Time exists/Now is all there is... We are One/We are many..."

Ezekiel laughed "That's True..." He stopped and looked at Martin proudly. "I like that _you're_ telling _me_ the answers now" He smiled contently and raised his eyes upwards once more. "Now the question is... Are we looking up at the stars... Or are we looking down on them? And, if we _are_looking down on them, how would it feel to fall forward... into them?" He coughed, cleared his throat and then said softly… "Do you remember?"

"Remember what?" Martin said innocently, his eyes still bathing appreciatively in the pool of the night sky.

"Do you remember falling into it all? Do you remember your transcendental journey through the universe? And the things you _learnt_ in that moment?"

"Errm… let me think" Martin said sarcastically, scratching his chin as he did so. "Of course I bloody remember it! I'm not going to forget something like that am I?" He shook his head in mock disbelief, yet his eyes never left the heavens. "I may not know what it all _meant_… But I remember how it _felt_. I was just thinking about it now actually…. I was just remembering back to it now" His voice softened "I saw it all, didn't I? I saw it _all_… I _travelled_ through it all…" He breathed out slowly "I saw it all connected… And how all things are One"

"Yes, you did" Ezekiel said gently "_I_ did… _We_ did" He nodded and then tapped Martin on his right arm. "That's what we have to write about next. That is what the next chapter is all about…We have to explain how all of this…" he gestured out to the universe "_All_of it… is connected. We have to tie it all together in a neat little bow and make it all make sense" He looked around at Martin's still, laying form and tapped him again on his resting arm. "Are you up for it, do you think?"

Martin turned to look at his future self. "If _you_ are _I_ am" He grinned happily. "I mean, if you can help me remember… If you can help me _understand_ what it all meant… I'm definitely up for it"

"Great…" said Ezekiel slowly raising himself up into a sitting position "Then grab the book and your pen because I'm about to tell you the Truth of the cosmology of the Universe"

"That'd be cool" Martin said almost casually as if he'd just been asked if he fancied an ice cream. He then pushed himself onto his elbows and looked around him for his rucksack. He found it at his feet and quickly retrieved the book and his pen. He then opened it up at the first blank page and put the tip of his pen to the book. "What's this chapter going to be called then?" he asked inquisitively, rearranging himself into a comfortable, seated position.

"Just call it… 'The Universe and how it's all connected'" Ezekiel said cheerfully "That should peak their interest"

Martin laughed and wrote the title on the clean, white page. "Excellent… I've been looking forward to this one for quite a while…" he said excitedly.

"Good… Then this is how it begins…"

Ezekiel told him the Secret… And Martin wrote the Truth down in his book…

6.30am Sunday 13th September 2045: The kitchen in Ezekiel's cottage, Tarn Hows, Cumbria

Martin had started writing in his own journal about his time at the cottage. It was only a small, pocket size book but he used it as a way of getting his own personal thoughts down on everything that was happening to him. This crazy, life changing adventure needed recording somehow and, as there was no one else here, it was up to him to write it all down. He sat at the kitchen table scratching down his feelings on the previous days discussion on karma and reincarnation and then describe the day's events in brief detail. He munched on a bowl of cereal as he did so...

"I thought we'll maybe try a walk over to Coniston today..." Ezekiel placed Martin's second mug of tea of the morning down on the table next to him and started to move slowly over to his own chair, "It looks like it could be a nice one" Suddenly the old man stumbled slightly, corrected himself and then coughed twice as he lowered himself into a sitting position and breathed out heavily once rested. He looked pale, his face seemed thinner than usual and he also looked in great discomfort.

"Are you ok, Ezi?" Martin asked, his mouth full of cornflakes. He had started calling his future self 'Ezi' a few weeks previously on Ezekiel's own request. Apparently that was 'what he's always called him' and, therefore, it'd be a good idea for Martin to start sooner rather than later.

"Oh yes, I'm fine..." Ezekiel said dismissively, "I'm an old man, you know. I'm bound to have a few aches and pains now and again. And we've been doing quite a bit of walking recently, haven't we? It's probably just that..."

"Well, we don't have to walk today do we?" Martin's mouth was now cornflake free and his spoon was pointing at the kitchen window. "Why don't we just stay in the garden and work on the book?" Martin rose from his chair and began walking towards the large, oblong window still holding onto his cereal bowl as he did so. "I mean, it's a lovely day... and you've got a beautiful garden" Martin looked out of the tranquil lake and scenery at the bottom of the cottage's lawn. "Why do we have to go anywhere?"

"Well, I don't suppose we do _have_ to..." Ezekiel's voice was soft and his eyes twinkled for the first time that day. "We could just stay here in the garden and talk... As long as we get the next chapter written I don't suppose it matters _where_ we do it... Just as long as we _do_ do it"

"Exactly" Martin grinned. "I mean we could just stay here until the book's finished if you want and..."

"No, no..." Ezekiel interrupted, his face suddenly serious "We do need to walk... We need one _last_walk... before the end... That's what happens..." His face looked worried as if contemplating the unravelling of some important, future plan.

"Ok, that's ok..." Martin moved over to Ezekiel making calming gestures, "Don't worry... We'll have that last walk... OK?"

Ezekiel looked at him as if embarrassed by his own anxiousness. "Yes... Sorry, Martin. I'm just..." He paused as if scared of revealing too much to his younger self. "It's getting near the last day now and I just want all this to work out the way it _has_ to work out" He looked down at his own mug of tea and rubbed his index finger along the rim. "The end of the journey is only days away, Martin. There's not long to go..."

"Yeah, there's not many blank pages left in the book..." Martin looked over at the closed manuscript, which was resting on the oak table beside him. "I realise we must be getting near the end now"

"We're all getting near the end, Martin" Ezekiel said softly. "The end comes for all of us... One day. But the magical thing is... The end is just a beginning... As one door closes, another one opens... Because in ultimate reality, death doesn't exist... Life is Eternal..."

"Yeah, I remember... That was the first thing I learnt... The first thing I _remembered_" Martin walked over to pick up the book. "But we've already covered that in the book, haven't we?"

"Well, not in detail" Ezekiel took a gulp of his tea. "There's still a lot to be said on death and the afterlife. In fact, that's what the next chapter is all about" He added confidently.

"Oh really?" Martin said, his eyebrows rose. "That sounds like fun"

"Right, well you grab the camping chairs and I'll meet you outside in ten minutes" Ezekiel rose slowly and moved over to the kitchen side where two slices of lightly done toast had just ejected themselves and the kettle steamed proudly. "I'm just going to take Yasmin her breakfast in bed, then I'll be along and we'll talk about the everlasting nature of the soul and it's journey through All That Is... We'll write down the secrets of death itself and the true knowledge of the eternal spirit within us all"

"That sounds like it's going to be a great chapter, to say the least" Martin said excitedly.

"And it's all going down in that book... after I've delivered this peanut butter on toast!" Ezekiel smiled happily and disappeared out through the kitchen door armed with a silver tray and good intentions.

Martin let out a laugh and finished writing the final sentence in his journal. He closed the little book up and put it inside the top pocket of his shirt. He looked over at the other book, the book of 'Truth', as it rested on the table slightly off to his left. He reached over and pulled the leather bound book towards him. He opened it near the end, just after the where the last chapter had finished. He stared down at the empty, yet to be written page with wondering eyes. What secrets would it soon contain?

Thirty minutes later the two men who were really One were sat at the bottom of the garden, the book was been written and the words were bound for all eternity...

Ezekiel told him the Secret... And Martin wrote the Truth down in his book...

An extract from Martin's personal journal:

10.23pm Tues 15th September 2045...

Today was a good day. Well, it had it's good and it's bad moments, to be honest. It was a day off two halves really...

In the morning, Ezi and me walked a little bit further than we had done the day before and, more so than ever, we had a really good laugh together. He comes out with some right stuff sometimes. He's really funny. I don't know where he gets it from. It's not from me. Anyway, we ended up near Gumberthorpe and settled for the day by a lovely little lake, had an ice cream each and wrote another section of the book. These last few chapters have been really amazing to read back. To see written down a workable blueprint for future world harmony is just mind blowing to say the least. I see how it was done... I see how it _can_be done... And it fills me with so much hope for the future. These secrets are going to save the world and it's up to me to make sure all of mankind hear them when I get back home to my own time.

No pressure then!

Ezi's says that tomorrow I'll learn how it all of that is going to happen and what exactly I have to do with all this knowledge when I return to 2010. I'm looking forward to going back home but I'm going to miss Ezi a lot. And older Yasmin. She's been beautiful to me. She's really made me feel at home here. Sometimes though, out of the corner of my eye, I've seen her staring at me as if trying to see through the perception filter around my neck. I wonder if she knows who I really am? Maybe Ezi's told her? Either way, she's treated me with a lot of love and care which, at the same time, has made me miss my _own_ Yasmin ever more...

When we got back to the cottage about 4-ish Anya was here with the kids. As always, it was great to see her and I played 'Snakes and Ladders' with the Faith and Elijah whilst she and her mother prepared the evening meal. They made an amazing vegetable curry that had to be tasted to be believed, topped off with golden chips and narn bread. I let the diet slip for today. I was in food heaven. The kids loved it too. But Anya, Yasmin and Ezi didn't seem to eat that much. They all looked a little distracted, to be honest. Almost like something was going unsaid. So, after the food was done, I offered to take the kids out for a brief walk through the nearby woods so the 'grown ups' could have some alone time together. We returned back to the cottage just over an hour later and when we went in to the living room the atmosphere was definitely muted and sombre. As much as they tried to hide it, I could tell that all three of them had been crying. Anya distracted the children with a box of Quality Street and the promise of a game of hide and seek before they had to leave. I really wanted to ask Ezi what was wrong, but I could tell by the way he looked at me that he didn't want me to ask. So I didn't ask. I felt it was right to let this one go, as it would be somehow 'wrong' for me to intrude. And I really don't understand why I should feel that way…

When Anya and the kids had gone and 8 o'clock came I made my excuses and went up to my room for an early night. I really felt Ezi and Yasmin needed some more time alone. They both seemed really tactile tonight even more than usual. They held hands as they sat by the fire and Ezi would lean over every few minutes and kiss Yasmin tenderly on the cheek. I thought it was best to let them have some quality time together so I came upstairs and worked on my drawings and then wrote in this journal.

I heard Yasmin crying again a few moments ago as I was writing this entry. It was such a sad sound that it made me cry too. And I dont even know what I'm crying about. I feel like I want to run downstairs now and ask them both what's going on. But something is stopping me. It's like I just _know_ I'm not meant to. I'm meant to let the story play out to it's natural end. I really can't understand my own feelings at the moment. It's almost like I'm trying to deny the undeniable…

So I'm going to go to bed now and I'm going to try and dream about happy things… Sunny days, bright horizons and a peaceful future world. And trees… I always seem to dream about trees at the moment!

Good night, diary. I have a feeling tomorrow is going to be a very eventful day...

7.31am Wed 16th September 2045: By the lake near Ezekiel's cottage, Tarn Hows, Cumbria:

"I wonder what's keeping him…"

Martin turned from his walking and looked back upon the dwelling place of his future self. The picture perfect cottage stood idyllically near the waters edge, its white washed walls reflecting the morning light so the whole building seemed to literally glow.

By the old wooden door Martin could see Ezekiel still saying goodbye to Yasmin. On setting off for their walk this morning the older man had asked Martin to walk on without him for a few minutes, as he needed to 'speak to Yasmin alone'. That was over ten minutes ago now and still the couple were in deep conversation. They seemed to hug each other for long periods of time in-between their words until one last, long embrace ended with Yasmin turning suddenly and re-entering the cottage, closing the door behind her without looking back. Ezekiel stood staring at the closed door for several seconds before, with the aid of his trusty black stick, finally walking slowly away from his home and towards the path that led to Martin…

On reaching Martin's position several minutes later Ezekiel looked pale and drawn. He'd clearly been crying.

"Are you ok, Ezi?" Martin asked gently.

"Yeah, I'm fine" The old man replied almost dismissively, "The pieces are in place, Martin. The puzzle is coming together…" He carried on walking past his younger self's still form. "C'mon… No more looking back… Time to face our destiny"

Martin pulled his rucksack tighter on his back and, with a slight shake of his head, followed in the old man's footsteps. He soon caught up and began to walk casually beside him, yet both men remained silent for several minutes in a way that felt more than uncomfortable…

"So which way _is_ our destiny, Ezi?" Martin could bare the silence no more.

"You already know the answer, Martin" Ezekiel's eyes remained on the path ahead. "You already know where this road leads. There can only be one path we take now"

Martin knew immediately where they were heading. "Are we going to the crossroads near McMillan field? To the path you only took once, many years ago, when you were me?"

Ezekiel nodded sadly "Yes… where else? Today is the last day…"

"The last day for what?" Martin's voice was dry and brittle.

"The last day for you and me to be here… Tomorrow is the start of another adventure for _both_ of us…" Ezekiel climbed an old wooden gate as he spoke. "Let's take a short cut, shall we?" He pointed with his walking stick to the other end of the field. "If we cut through here we can get to the crossroad quicker. There's no point in delaying this any longer…" Detaching himself from the gate, he began to walk through the long grass of the farmer's field.

"Isn't that private property, Ezi?" Martin shouted concerned. "Are we even allowed in that field?"

"We're allowed anywhere, Martin" Ezekiel kept his back to his younger self as he continued walking, using his stick to push back the long grass. "And, besides, the farmer won't mind 'cos he's never here"

Martin began to climb the gate. "Why? Where is he?"

"He's at the same place as everybody else", the old man shouted back as if that explained everything.

"Well, where's everyone else?" Martin jumped down from the gate and began to pursue his older self through the field. "Actually, come to think about it… I've never seen anybody else apart from you, Yasmin, Anya and the kids in all the time I've been here! Where _is_ everybody else?"

Ezekiel let out a laugh. "Oh, Martin, have you only just realised that?" He stopped dead in his tracks. "Actually, I remember now that it is… You've only just realised that, haven't you?"

Martin caught up with the old man and put a hand out to grab the old man's coat. "Yes… It never even occurred to me before now. Why is that? Why are we alone here?"

"Oh, we're not alone…" Ezekiel spoke confidently "We've never been alone in all the time we have been on this journey. There are many here with us right now following every step we take and every word we utter… We are never alone" He began to walk forward hitting out a grass again with his stick. "The others that are supposed to 'live' here… The farmers and the villagers… They aren't here right now because they don't have a part to play in this story. They are never to be seen. Therefore… for right now… they do not exist…"

"What does that mean?" Martin was more puzzled than ever.

"It means the end of our journey is just over that hedge over there and two fields down to the right. It means that all the questions will be answered soon and the eternal mystery will finally be solved. It means that this is the last day… And the end is coming"

Martin let out an inevitable snort of laughter. "Is there any chance you could be a little more cryptic?" He said sarcastically. "The end to what? Everything?"

"The end of all things?" Ezekiel turned to look at his younger self and made eye contact for the first time that day. His eyes were bright yet sad and yet, at the same time, somehow full of hope of an eternal promise. "No… Not the end of all things. _Never_ the end of all things… Life is eternal, remember? Eternal never ends…" He smiled a faint smile and placed his right hand on Martin's left shoulder tenderly. His voice was little more than a whisper "I'm talking about the end of the story… Where our journey reaches its conclusion... By the tree at the end of the dream"

Martin frowned questioningly "I'm not in a dream am I? 'Cos if this all turns out to be a dream I'm going to be sssooooooo disappointed"

Ezekiel let out a laugh "You wouldn't be the only one! No... You are not in a dream. You are in an experience... A _shared_ experience"

"Whom am I sharing it with?"

"Yourself..." He smiled his warmest of smiles, "…And those that follow the words"

"The words in 'The Truth'?"

"Yes"

"But why is this the end?"

"Because the story has already been written...And the ending was decided a long time ago"

"By whom?"

"By you…By me… By all that you see…"

"I'm not going to get a straight answer am I?" Martin shook his head smiling.

"You wouldn't want it any other way, Martin" Ezekiel grinned brightly, squeezed the younger man's shoulder, let go and then turned to continue his journey…

Five minutes later and the two men who were really One had crossed the field and rejoined the path that lead to the crossroads. They both remained silent but this time it was a comfortable silence only broken by the bird song that filled the vibrant, warming air. As they approached the cross roads at McMillan field the first thing Martin noticed was that something small and white had been pinned to the old oak tree at the centre of the crossing. Martin moved speedily ahead of his future self to be the first that arrived at the tree.

"What's this?" He reached out to take the envelope from the tree. Written on it in black ink was…

'To both Martins…'

"It's from The Doctor" Martin said excitedly detaching it from the tree "I'd know that handwriting anywhere!"

"Is it really?" Ezekiel said in mock surprise, "Well I never…"

"Shall I open it?" Martin said his fingers already tearing at the seal.

"Yes… You do" Ezekiel returned quietly.

Martin read the letter aloud…

'Dear chaps,

Just wanted to say sorry I cant be with you both right now. There's a bit of trouble going on with the Chumblies of Galaxy 4 and an apparent copyright infringement with Hoover that needs my full attention… Not to mention my sonic screwdriver and a physic pen But I'll soon be done with that and I'll be joining you both at the Tree at the end of the dream before you can say Raksocoricalpholopatorius…

I'm very proud of you both for coming this far, by the way. We're nearly done now. It's almost time to go home.

Ezekiel, you know what you have to do…

Martin, you don't but you soon will… And please keep these little notes I keep leaving around. You're going to need them soon… or, rather, I will. Also there's a lovely red rose growing at the base of this tree…'

Martin looked down and sure enough there was a beautiful velvet like red rose that stood alone in the shadow of the great oak tree…

'Pick it now and put it gently in your rucksack, if you will. You're going to be glad you've got it later on when you get to give it to someone you love at exactly the right moment…

Right, got to go 'cos I'm getting shouted at by Jason Donovan (and you know how he can be! Although how he got to be a lawyer I'll never know! I blame Kylie!).

Great job, guys, the book is brilliant and it's gonna save the world… Literally!

Happy times and places

The Doctor

PS: I wear a trilby now. Trilby's are cool…'

There was even a little drawing of a stick man wearing an enormous trilby running away from an alien that looked more like a vacuum cleaner. Martin stopped reading and looked over at his older self who simply smiled and shrugged knowingly.

"He's funny, isn't he? And clever" Ezekiel sighed "C'mon then… Pick that flower and let's get along this narrow path" The old man nodded off to the right hand route his face full of anxiety and haste.

Martin bent down and picked the perfect rose carefully from its resting place. He then swung his bag from his shoulders, unfastened it and looked inside to where he could place the rose without crushing it. To his surprise he immediately saw an empty kitchen roll tube resting at the top of his bag. He didn't remember packing it himself…

"How did this get in here?" He asked aloud at Ezekiel's departing figure.

"Like I say… Clever" The old man continued forward on the narrow path without looking back. "C'mon… we're nearly there…"

Martin gently placed the rose inside the tube and lowered it carefully into the side pocket of his rucksack. He swung the bag back on his back and followed his future self off to the right hand side of the crossing, his head full of unanswered questions and growing expectations…

Seven minutes later and the two men who were really One had arrived at their destination.

"There… That's the spot" Ezekiel pointed a long, aged finger at the scene in front of them. A perfect golden field looked out over a tranquil lake, which in turn, was surrounded by majestic, grey and silver mountains. In the centre of the field was a giant ash tree, it's golden leaves reflecting radiantly the morning sun almost as if they had been sprinkled with diamonds.

"Wow… That is beautiful" Martin's eyes bathed in the scene of perfection. "Where are we? What's this place called?"

"It's called 'Eternal pastures' and this is where it ends, Martin" Ezekiel said calmly. "And that picture perfect tree is the tree at the end of the dream… Also known as the tree of life… Often called the tree of the knowledge of good and evil… It's where we've been heading all this time… A place where we finally see the answer… and reach this journey's end"

Martin moved closer to his future self and placed a hand gently on his left shoulder. "What happens here?" He whispered.

Ezekiel let out a tiny almost nervous laugh "Well, we walk over there… We sit underneath the tree… We talk and we laugh… We even have a bite to eat… We write the end of the book… And then…" He looked around at Martin for the first time, his eyes were full of tears… "And then you watch me die…"

'No death is wasted,

And all death brings a message

To those who leave the earth

And those who remain' –

Neale Donald Walsh, 'Home with God'


	33. Chapter 33

**THIRTY-THREE**

'Life is Eternal;

And love is immortal;

And death is only a horizon;

And a horizon is nothing save the limit of our sight'

- Rossiter W. Raymond (1840-1918)

"I'm going to watch you die?"

Martin paced behind Ezekiel as his future self strode purposely towards the beckoning call of the field that contained the tree of knowledge.

"Yeah, well… It's was pretty obvious, wasn't it?" The old man said wiping away the tears in his eyes with the right hand before looking round briefly at Martin. "All that crying… All those long goodbyes… What else could happen on 'The Last Day'?" He smiled gently at Martin then returned his gaze forward towards the ash tree. "But don't worry… It's all quite magical… It gives the book it's ending. This is how it was _always_ going to end…"

"But…"

"Oh, Martin! Wait until we get to the tree and all your questions will be answered, I promise you." He pointed at the giant tree that stood majestically in front of them. Its golden leaves shimmered alluringly with pure, divine light whilst its trunk was a solid, dark brown twisted, and yet sculptured, to perfection. "Look at that! Have you ever seen a more beautiful tree?"

Martin stopped and tried to take in the sublime perfection of the scene in front of him. His mind felt like it was in sensory overdrive. It wasn't just the tree, with all its 'Tree of Life' importance, it was also the entire surroundings: The picture perfect mountains, the tranquil, velvet lake, the light blue sky and perfectly placed sun. It all had a dream like quality…

And it wasn't _just_ the surroundings, it was the entire concept of why he was there in the first place; apparently now to see his own death played out in front of him and to finish writing the book that contained the 'Truth' of all things. And now here he stood in front of the mystical tree that he'd seen so many times in his dreams over the last few weeks. Here he stood; awaiting the last revelations and the moment he would witness the end of his days…

"The tree at the end of the dream…" Martin whispered. He then walked silently forward to join his future self in the shadow of the great tree…

Two hours later and the two men who were really One were sat underneath the Tree of Life putting the final touches to their 'world saving' book. No more had been said about Ezekiel's forthcoming 'death' or how it would even occur. In fact, the mood had been almost jovial with the older man on wonderful form with his infamous 'joke within a story' anecdotes. They'd already eaten their pack up, made up of mainly cheese and onion sandwiches, and were more than halfway through their second flask of coffee. And, most importantly, they had almost finished the book now, only a handful of blank pages were left at the end…

Martin closed the book of 'Truth' gently and placed it down on the soft, green grass next to him. He looked over at the older man who was now leaning his head back onto the stump of the great tree.

"Ezi?" Martin said softly "I just can't hold back from asking you anymore…Why _do_ you die? What is it that kills you? Are you unwell?"

The old man reached out and placed his hand slowly on top of Martin's. He squeezed it gently whilst watching their hands making contact before looking up directly into Martin's eyes.

"Well I _was_ fine… My health was first rate until recently and then… the pain started" He kept his hand on top of Martin's and looked down at it once more.

"Pain?" Martin quizzed.

"Yeah… I'm ill, Martin… I'm terminally ill. My illness… it's called T.E.S…'Temporal Erosion Syndrome' apparently… According to The Doctor, that is… It's side effect of the 'Blinavitch Limitation' law…" Ezekiel shifted in his seated position but didn't move his hand. "It gives me all sorts of aches and pains… And it's killing me… Literally…"

"But how? What is it? How long have you had it?"

"Well… How long have _you_ been here?" Ezekiel sank his head slightly further down the tree stump.

Martin was puzzled as to the line of questioning, but answered anyway "I arrived on Anya's birthday so… I've been here slightly over two months, I think"

"Well then I've had it… slightly over two months, I think" The old man said quietly.

"What?"

"Temporal erosion, Martin. It's the price you pay for having two aspects of the same person in such a localised area in the time field. Apparently been in the same proximity as my younger self has eroded away the tachyon particles that hold my entire body together in the first place. It seems this space/time continuum just isn't big enough for the both of us. It's a bit of a downer but I can't say it wasn't expected… and at least it's symmetrical" The old man laughed at his own sentence.

"What are you saying?" Martin pleaded, "I don't understand what you mean…"

"I mean… It's you… _You_ been _here_… That's what's killing me" He rubbed the top of Martin's hand then squeezed it gently once more.

Martin quickly moved his hand away. "What?" He eyes were large and questioning. "What do you mean? That me been here has given you this illness? That my very touch is literally _killing_ you?" He backed away from the old man but his eyes remained transfixed on his future self who was simply nodding knowingly.

"Yes… That's exactly what I mean"

"Well then I have to go…" Martin rose from his seated position, "I have to get away from you and…"

"Martin, Martin…" Ezekiel shook his head, "It's far too late for that… The damage is already done. The tachyon break down has been happening within the cells of my body since the moment you arrived. There's nothing we can do to stop it. It's eating away at me like a cancer… I'm dying… Here… Now…Soon… This is how it ends"

Martin sank to his knees, his head bowed in defeat. "But it can't end like this… With me… well, with me almost _killing_ myself!"

"You've not killed yourself, Martin…" Ezekiel's voice was broken but soothing. "It's the T.E.S that has killed me, as I always knew it would. I've known since…" He looked at his younger self and let out a gentle laugh, "Well… Since now, really… When my dying future self told me about it" He smiled warmly at Martin his eyes glistened reassuringly. "Don't worry… I'm almost _happy_ about it… My death was the greatest gift I ever gave to myself"

Martin was heart broken "But how? How can _this_ be a gift?"

Ezekiel's smile grew even more "You'll see… You'll even thank me at the end"

"But how can the TES be affecting you and not me? Shouldn't I be dying too?" Martin remained standing casting a long shadow over Ezekiel's face.

The old man pointed to himself "Well you _are,_ in a way, but I know what you mean" His face dropped a little as he indicated Martin to sit beside him. "It'd be wrong to think it's not affecting you… because it is"

Martin moved over to sit back underneath the tree "How? What's it doing to me?"

"It's affecting your brain, Martin…Your memory to be precise… It's making you forget all that you've learned" The old man's voice was brittle and dry. He reached down to take a sip of his cold coffee.

"What do you mean?" Martin's eyes narrowed as he watched the old man drink.

"What's in the book, Martin? What's in the book of 'Truth'?"

Martin's frown increased "Well, it's The Truth, I hope" He said pointedly.

"Yes but… Can you remember everything, or even _anything,_ you have written?"

"Well, I know we wrote about the nature of the soul and it's relationship to God… conscious creation… The key to future world harmony… Loads of stuff…"

"But what about specifically?" The older man asked gently "Can you remember anything _specifically__… _word for word… from the book?"

Martin thought about what was in the book but to his alarm found somehow that he couldn't quite latch on to the contents properly. "I… I sort of remember bits of it… Glimpses of it…" He began to panic "Why can't I remember?"

Ezekiel placed his hand once more on Martin's and looked him directly in the eye. "Don't worry, Martin… It's the TES… It's eating away at the words and eroding your memory with every temporal shift… You've been forgetting things right from the beginning… And even before that! But it was always meant to be like this because you're mind isn't fully open enough to contain 'The Truth'… That's why we've been writing it down in the book… The book contains 'The Truth'… as does your everlasting soul… But your mind can only hold the briefest of its echoes… Like tiny splinters taken from an essence of ultimate reality…"

Martin shook his head "You just sound more and more like The Doctor everyday" He allowed himself a brief laugh.

"And I wonder why that is?" Ezekiel's smile was bigger than ever.

"He's behind all this, isn't he?"

"Of course he is!" Ezekiel lowered himself further down the tree stump so he was almost lying flat, with only his head raised slightly. "The Doctor's behind everything that's been going on. He's 'The Man with the Plan'… Oh, you've got a big secret to learn about The Doctor yet. He's not quite who you think he is…"

"Well who is he then?"

"What? Do you think I'm going to tell you now?" Ezekiel seemed genuinely shocked. "Where would the fun be in that? That's not how it works, Martin… And you know it" The old man still managed to grin at his younger self "You'll learn soon enough… It's a bit of a shocker but it gives you a great chapter ending" He winked at the younger man.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"For the book" Ezekiel nodded over to the book of 'Truth' that lay on the grass near Martin's feet "It's all about the book, Martin… _All_ of it… Which reminds me… Have you got the glasses?"

"What?"

"The glasses The Doctor gave you… The ones that 'break down the fabric of reality and let you see other dimensions'…" He rose both hands in a 'quote' sign "And the ones you nearly used to spy on us with… that night in the garden" Ezekiel chuckled to himself which made him cough briefly.

Martin reached inside the top pocket of his jacket and withdrew the black spectacle case. "Yeah, I've got them… I've taken them everywhere with me"

"Good…" Ezekiel said breathlessly, "You're going to need them soon". He then began to cough again this time he banged his fist on his chest as he convulsed.

"When do I use them?" Martin opened the case and took out the glasses.

Slowly controlling his coughing, Ezekiel made a 'wait' gesture with his hand whilst he took out a bottle of water from his rucksack and then began to drink it appreciatively. He swallowed hard and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

"You put them just after I…" he hesitated slightly, "… after I _go__" _He looked out across the meadow. "That's when you see it…"

"See what?" Martin whispered his eyes following the old man's gaze.

"You see the truth of _how_ we go on… How we return home… And who is there to guide us" Ezekiel turned to look at his younger self. "No more words… Lets have silence now for a few minutes… I really want to take in this view" He gestured out to their surroundings "After all, this is the last thing I'll ever see with these old eyes… And then I'll explain to you this 'Tree of Life', you'll write it in the book and it'll all make sense… But for now…. Sshhhhhhhh…. Let's listen to the beauty inside the quiet… "

The two men who were really One stared outwards in silence, away from the Tree of Life and waited for the end to come…

From Martin's personal journal:

I don't really know where to start this entry. How can I sum up how I'm feeling now? I've got some time to try as Ezekiel feel asleep nearly an hour ago… So here goes…

I'm writing this as I'm sat underneath 'The Tree of Life', having just had its real meaning fully explained to me by Ezekiel so I could write in down in the book. For right now I totally understand it all … All the majestic simplicity alongside the infinite complexity… and it's so beautiful. I don't know how long I'll be able to hold it in my mind before the TES steals it from my memory but at least I know it's written down so I'll be able to read it back when I get home at some future date…

… or, in fact, some past time (this time travel business plays havoc with the tenses!)…

Ezi told me that I'd have to finish the rest of the book of 'Truth' on my own. The last two chapters I have to write solo. I really don't know what I'm going to write but he assured me I find the words. He says that when he first read it, the last two chapters were his favourites. That didn't really make sense to me but I let it pass… He's answered enough questions for me. And I'm sure he just said it to be encouraging…

So, anyway, I'm sat here waiting to find out how all this is going to end. I was hoping The Doctor was going to turn up suddenly and be with us both for this 'final journey', but Ezi told me he doesn't show up until 'after'… But when he does everything is 'ok' so not to worry. He even told me that The Doctor takes care of his 'body' and makes sure it gets home. He already has the funeral booked, apparently, and the invites went out last week! Which is either coldly logical or lovingly respectful… I can't quite decide which. I asked if Yasmin and Anya know what's going to happen today and he said simply 'They've always known… How could they not?'

I had a little cry at that point. I know that telling 'my' Yasmin and Anya about this day will be something I do as soon as I get back home to my time… I've got nothing to hide from them… It'll be hard for them to hear but I want them to know of the hope… I want them to know of this perfect future, this ongoing world and I always want them to know and hear the Truth of my heart.

Love is Truth expressed. That's something I've remembered…

Ezekiel's been asleep now for over an hour and a half. He said he needed a little nap but not to worry because he wakes up one last time before the end. He smiled when he said it and he looked so… complete. We both had a little cry at that point too. There's been a lot of crying going on today. Hardly surprising really…

So, here I am, about to watch myself die… How strange is that? I really didn't think my story would end here… And it's here now beside me. Literally… My future self. He's talking in his sleep and looking frail and ancient. I know that the next time he opens his eyes… it'll be the last.

Reading this back, it's become apparent, despite my original intention, that I've not written down how I actually feel, have I? Maybe I cant right now. My brain is fried. My heart is in pieces but, at the same time, my soul is lifted. I saw a broken rainbow earlier. It hung in the sky looking so sad yet so beautifully 'right'… Like an ultimate contradiction…. That's how I feel right now… That's the only way I can describe it…. Sorry I can't do better than that…

Anyway, why am I apologizing? Who to? My 'Journal'? Maybe I'm writing to the 'others that are on the journey with us'… whoever they are? I've yet to find out about all that, haven't I? I've still got so many questions that haven't been answered yet. I hope I get chance to ask them…

So I don't really know who I'm writing this for, but whoever you are… Thanks for sharing the journey. I hope the ending lives up to your expectations… For all our sakes.

I'm blathering now. Time to say goodbye…

M

Ezekiel was still in a restless sleep. He was laid totally flat with his head rested on a folded blanket, his arms down to his sides. He'd been calling out to Yasmin in his sleep before a coughing fit woke him briefly. Now he was snoring again: a broken, brittle sound that was more like a quite, desperate gasp.

Martin sat beside the old man watching every twitch and moan with increasing concern. His future self looked visibly older with every minute that passed and his skin had taken on a grey, withered texture. He looked thinner too, almost like time itself was literally eating him away.

"…Na…Na…" Ezekiel's snoring was now sounding more like talking. "…Na… Nana…" He gasped hoarsely "…Nan…" The old man began to cry in his sleep…

"Ezi?" Martin shook him gently on the shoulder "Ezi? Are you ok? You're dreaming…"

Ezekiel opened his eyes slowly, his gaze shifting to Martin's as soon as it could focus. He reached out for the younger man's hand and found it waiting for him.

"Oh, Hello, Martin…" Ezekiel smiled softly, his voice was now just a broken croak. "I'm glad you're still here…"

*You were calling out in your sleep… To Nana, I think…" Martin stroked the old man's hand gently. "Did you… Did you see her?"

Ezekiel nodded "Yes… I saw her… She's come for me… It's nearly time for me to go…"

Martin felt his heart sink, his throat tighten and his eyes sting painfully as desperate tears pleaded to be released. He looked down at his older self: This brilliant, clever, funny, loving old man he'd come to love and respect so much over the last few months. He looked into his eyes… and saw his own…

"But I don't want you to go…" Martin could hold back the tears no longer and he wept openly, his head bowed and his shoulders slumped and dejected.

Ezekiel remained silent and watched his younger self with a knowing, compassionate smile. He knew he should let Martin let out as much emotional energy as he needed to. He even reached inside his own shirt pocket and handed him a clean linen handkerchief.

"I brought this especially for you…" He said with a slight grin. "I knew you'd be needing it… I saw that broken rainbow too, remember?"

Martin laughed within his tears and took the handkerchief appreciatively. He wiped his eyes and blew his nose for several minutes before finally calming himself and returning his attention to the dying man.

"There… Are you done?" Ezekiel asked gently.

"Yes… Sorry…"

"Oh don't apologize, Martin… I'd be a bit miffed it you _weren__'__t_ crying, to be honest… So you go ahead" He tried to grin one of his cheeky grins but instead it looked more like a grimace of pain. Perhaps it was. "But there's no real need for sadness… This has been _the_ most expected death that anyone could ever wish for. This is a gift…. And I am grateful for it. And you'll be thanking me for it by the end, I promise you… And look at this…" Ezekiel made a faint motion with his hand "Look at where we are… and what we have done. Look at what we have shared and what we have written. If you could choose any death… Would it not be this one?" He face softened as his eyes twinkled with the embers of life. " I've said my goodbyes to those that I love… We're out amongst the beauty of creation…I'm seventy seven… I've lived a long and relatively painless life… I've written a book that will save the world… I'm about to show myself the most life affirming sight I have ever witnessed… " He paused and looked out across the great lake. "And I'm about to go home… Back to God… And love without condition…"

He let out another painful moan as he shifted position slightly.

"Are you…" Martin began before stopping himself.

"Ok?" Ezekiel's eyebrow was raised. "No, not really… This old body of mine is wearing a bit thin…" He sank his head back further into the folded blanket and tried to get comfortable. "Going soon… Time to say goodbye… It's the end…"

"…But the moment has been prepared for?" Martin finished the sentence for him. "Where have I heard that before?"

"Oh, it's just something The Doctor said once…" Ezekiel said dismissively. "We both heard it… a long time ago…"

"But…"

"Martin, I haven't got long…" The old man's voice was fading in volume and his vocal chords sounded even more craggy and broken. "There's things… I need to tell you…"

Martin leaned in closer "Yes, I'm here" He placed his right hand on the old mans chest with his left hand still in Ezekiel's palm. "What is it?"

"Remember… You must teach what you must learn… The way you live your life is your spirituality demonstrated... Love is the key to all understanding… It is the only way to peace and the true nature of God…"

"I know… I…."

"_Remember_ love, Martin… If you remember love you will remember God… And God is the truth of all things… You have only got to remember that and you will remember it all…"

"I'll remember…" Martin's voice was shaking "No matter how much this 'disease' eats away at my memories… I'll remember"

Ezekiel pulled him closer his tone was lower and more urgent…

"Then remember this… The rose…you must give it to Anya for me… You must _show_ her it was from me… Do you understand?"

"Yes… I think so…" Martin looked over at his rucksack where he'd packed the rose. "When do I…?"

"There is only one moment and you will know that moment… You will tell her what you see here today… and you will remind her that her Dad will always be with her… That his love for her knows no bounds… And that I am but a thought away…" His voice trailed off as if he was listening to a distant echo.

"I'll tell her…" Martin could only whisper in response.

"She will be the first person you will tell 'The Truth' too… She will be the first of many… When you return home…back to your time…you will tell everyone… 'The Truth'… You will share the book with the world… And the world… will be saved" Ezekiel was growing increasingly short of breath.

"I'll try…"

"You will do it, Martin… I've already seen it… I've already _lived_ it" Ezekiel's speech was slowing down and his breathing became heavy and laboured.

"Ok…"

"Martin…" Ezekiel gripped the younger man's hand tighter "Tell Yasmin… I love her… Tell her I'll see her again soon… Tell her… I saw God in her eyes…"

"I will…" Martin's own eyes were full of tears as he stared into the pain-riddled face of his older self.

With his voice now more like a breathless rasp, Ezekiel focused directly in the younger man's pupils…

"And Martin… As for you… You that are… My living past and my perfect pupil… My beautiful 'self'… I see God in your eyes too…" He smiled the briefest of smiles and then closed his eyes and became still…

Martin looked worryingly at the old man. "Ezi?" He touched Ezekiel's face softly. "Ezi? Are you ok?"

His older self remained silent and unmoving. Martin hesitantly moved his ear closer to the old man's mouth and tried to listen for breath. He heard nothing. He then moved his head further down the old man's chest and pressed it against his left side rib cage. He heard no heart beat… No trace of life. He kept his head rested there hoping to hear one last beat… one lingering echo. He finally heard it… a faint pulse… a glimmer of hope. He quickly looked up to Ezekiel's face and saw the old man looking directly at him, his mouth poised ready to speak…

"It's time for you to put on the glasses…"

Ezekiel's head fell backwards; he closed his eyes for the last time and let out his last, short breath…

"Ezi?" Martin remained still. It was as if his own heart had frozen whilst his gaze was transfixed on the lifeless form in front of him. "Ezekiel?" He knew they could be no answer… The old man was dead… His body had reached its journeys end…

Martin remained perfectly still staring into Ezekiel's grey, lifeless face. He then slowly bowed his head and began to allow himself to cry. The cry soon turned into a soulful howl. It was a deep, primitive release of suppressed emotion that over took his whole body, making him shake uncontrollably. It lasted for several minutes, its intensity surprising even Martin.

He slowly began to control himself whilst his breathing became measured and precise. He dragged his eyes away from the old man's body and looked all around him at the great lake and the rolling hills, at the twilight sky and the majestic tree of life. His eyes then focused on his rucksack resting on the soft grass just off to his left. Suddenly a thought struck him and he patted his own jacket pockets urgently…

"The glasses…"

He found what he was looking for, reached inside his jacket and brought out the black spectacle case. He flipped it open and snatched at the black-rimmed glasses, his hands shaking as he did so. He quickly slotted them onto his face and then looked around him again, this time in jerky, urgent moves. The glasses seemed perfectly clear and un-tinted, his eyes didn't need to adjust in any way to wearing them. In fact, everything around him looked perfectly 'normal'. He looked down at the body of his future self. Again, he could see no difference in perception. He remained silent for several seconds, his eyes darting from one area to another looking for something 'different' to suddenly present itself. He could see nothing that seemed 'changed'. Were they working properly?

"I don't understand what I have to do, Ezi" Martin said aloud. "What am I supposed to be seeing?" He knew that no reply would come… so when it did it made his heart miss a beat.

"You're supposed to be seeing me, love" It was a warm, female voice that seemed to come from behind the tree.

Startled, Martin stood up quickly and looked in the direction the voice had come from. A figure was slowly emerging from behind the left hand side of the giant tree trunk. It was a woman… An angelically beautiful woman… Martin recognised her instantly…

"Nan?" He gasped.

"Hello again, love" She smiled in the way that only she could and then moved towards him gracefully. "You didn't think there was ever a time I was not here, do you?"

She looked so young… Younger even than Martin…Her skin looked so soft and almost transparent… Martin gazed into the loving eyes of his radiant grandmother… He saw her perfect, beautiful soul… He saw the love of God reflected in her…

"Oh, Nan…" He was crying again. This time his broken tears were made of joy…

"It's alright, love, don't cry… There's nothing to cry about… Literally… I'm here to take you home…"

Martin composed himself once more and then reached out his hand slowly to touch her face. To his alarm his hand passed straight through her form. He looked at his own hand and then back at the corporeal figure of Alice Briggs. He snatched away the glasses from his eyes and she disappeared from his vision. He quickly returned them to his face and there she was again.

"They're clever those glasses aren't they, love?" She nodded at the spectacles perched on Martin's nose. "And, when you think about it, what's even cleverer about them is they can make you _hear_ me too, even though they're not even touching your ears"

Martin let out a little laugh. How typical of his Nan to notice such a thing. "Well spotted, Nan"

"Oh, I don't miss a trick, love… Especially now" She smiled again and then reached out as if to stroke Martin's face. "I can't _physically_touch you… And you can't touch me… I can only touch your spirit…And this I'm doing now… I exist in another reality… A different dimension… I'm from the realm of the Absolute… Where God is… The other side, if you like…" She looked down at Ezekiel's dead body for the first time "And I've come to guide him home…" She turned again to face Martin and then seemed to look behind him and over his left shoulder "Oh look, love… it looks like we're about ready to go…"

Martin spun around to see where she was looking. About twenty feet away from him, against the backdrop of the velvet lake and the majestic mountains, a tiny pinprick of light hovered in mid air. It seemed to be growing larger with every passing second; its brilliant pure light was somehow blinding and yet gentle on the eye all at the same time. It grew bigger and brighter until it became a gaping hole in reality and a gateway to another dimension… A door to Heaven itself… It made no sound… It simply existed… A passage of blissful light…Hidden away from 'normal' reality…

Martin couldn't take his eyes off the tunnel of light. It seemed so warm and beckoning and it felt as if his soul was been drawn towards it. As he continued to gaze transfixed, he could see shapes appearing inside of it. Figures were collating within the cascade of light and slowly becoming visible.

"Who else is coming?" Martin looked behind him at his Grandmother's spirit and then back at the light.

"Oh, I think you know, love…"

Martin strained his eyes tighter to try and make out the materialising figure and, as the face became focused, he breathed in sharply…

"Mum?"

The Angel smiled as her soul touched Martin's.

"Hello, love… are you ok?" Her voice was soft and compassionate, just as it had always been. Martin's Mother had always been the kindest and most loving soul he had ever known in life. Joyce Briggs had always been the epitome of the perfect Mum. And now here she stood… The definition of the word Angel…

"Mum…" Martin could only speak within tears "Why are you there? When did you die?" He'd not stopped to think about it before but it was rushing through his mind now. He quickly worked out that, even if she had lived a long life, his mother was bound to have died by 2045…

"Don't worry about that, darling… Time has no meaning where I am… It doesn't exist… All is love… All is one…" She was completely visible now, her face angelically serene and her eyes filled with unconditional love. She seemed to glow from within and literally radiated love.

Martin looked back to the tunnel of light and could see more figures moving inside the blissful radiance. He couldn't make out any faces just silhouettes of half formed apparitions.

"Who else is here?" Martin asked gently.

"All those that you have loved… All those that you _will_ love… We are all here… Waiting for you to come home" Her smile was composed entirely of mother love and it melted into Martin's heart.

"I love you" He whispered the words

"I love you too" She whispered back, her voice full of truth.

"Mum…What's it like… On the other side?" was all he could gasp.

The spirit of Joyce Briggs let out a gentle laugh "Don't you remember?"

"Have I been there before?"

"Of course you have, darling… We all have… The circle of life is just that… A circle… Life is Eternal, remember?" Her words were so soft they almost caressed Martin's ears. "Life is God… And God is love… Eternal love… A love without condition… And a life without end…"

Martin stared compassionately into his Mother's face. His throat was tight as he spoke. "You showed me a love without condition, Mum… Every day of my life… You showed me"

Joyce's spirit raised a hand to his face and transfixed him with her eyes. "I've loved you from the moment you were born and every moment since. You are my son…and I am _very_ proud. I love you through all your faults and failings… because I see none. I see only my son… My child… My love… I see you with a Mother's eyes… I see you with God's eyes… And God's love is even greater than mine"

"I find that hard to believe…" Martin whispered.

"Believe it, darling… I wouldn't lie to you"

"I know you wouldn't…"

The Angel moved in closer "The mind forgets what the soul always knows…"

"I know it does… Especially when I've got this TES disease eating away at my memory… That's why I'm writing it down" Martin nodded over to his rucksack that contained his manuscript.

"I know" Joyce said softly. "It's a great book… I'm quite the fan"

Martin was slightly taken aback and then laughed with a brief snort. "Have you read it?"

"Of course I have… We all have… It saves the world, remember?" The smile remained on her face as sure as her eyes remained locked with Martin's.

"Oh yeah…" Martin said as if the implications of writing the book were only beginning to dawn on him.

Joyce Briggs spoke in the voice that could only belong to his Mother "I don't know… What are you like?" she said in the way that was always a false reprimand wrapped in affection.

Martin just nodded knowingly and allowed himself to laugh. "You know me, Mum… Always forgetting stuff… Now we know why…"

Martin and the soul of his Mother shared a look that meant more than a thousand words could ever convey and then the spirit slowly turned her head to look towards Ezekiel.

Martin followed her gaze. The old man's body was still lying lifeless at the foot of the tree but now he was joined by two more figures. The angelic Alice Briggs was stood to the left and to the right now stood a new corporal figure… A man…

"Ezi?"

Ezekiel's soul laughed. "Hello again, Martin…" The spirit still looked like an old man yet his voice seemed gentler. "It's good this, isn't it?" He said with a smile. He began to walk slowly over to where Martin was stood; his movements were graceful and measured. His facial features seemed to blur slightly as he moved closer until his face was only several inches from Martin's. "Look…" His spirit whispered gently.

Martin focused his gaze and found himself staring into his own face… Ezekiel's spirit looked exactly as he looked now.

"We are One" Martin's soul smiled at itself and all his questions were answered.

"Yes" He understood at last…

"It's time to go…" The spirits of Joyce and Alice Briggs were now stood either side of Ezekiel/Martin's departing soul. All three were joined at the hands as they slowly turned to face the light.

"Mum…" was all Martin could utter, his eyes were full of tears so he used his handkerchief to wipe them and the glasses clean.

The souls of Ezekiel and Alice Briggs moved gracefully forward in the direction of the light. Joyce's spirit remained for a moment more.

"Thank you…" Martin said looking into his Mother's eyes one last time. "Thank you for been here for me… Thank you for _always_ been here for me… In life _and_ in death…"

"I am always here for you, darling… In life and in death… I love you… I'll see you when you come home…" She gave him one last smile made of pure love, before turning to face the light and then moved, in an almost floating motion, towards the other two souls. They held out there hands for her and she took them gracefully. Martin followed their fluid movement as they walked towards the tunnel of light, the edges of their forms slowly blurring together.

Ezekiel's spirit made one last look over his shoulder. Again Martin saw his own face. This time he looked even younger than Martin did now. He smiled at himself and nodded one last goodbye before turning to face the blissful light once more. More figures seemed to appear before them and slowly join them in a loving, timeless embrace. As they departed further into the eternal light the edges of each soul were merging and becoming one. The light that shone from their collective souls was almost blinding and eventually the figures disappeared altogether and became one with the light of the tunnel.

The opening then slowly began to shrink in size as if the hole in reality was been gently repaired. Martin continued to watch as the brightness got smaller and smaller until eventually it was again the size of a pinprick of light. It then hung in mid-air like a speck of shining dust before floating on an unseen wind in the direction of the great tree and the body of Ezekiel.

Martin followed it closely, even getting within a foot of it at one point, but he didn't want to disturb its drifting path. He watched it hover above Ezekiel's lifeless body before it slowly descended onto the middle of his chest and disappearing inside.

Martin let out a small gasp in appreciation of the beauty of it and then knelt at the side of his future self and took off the glasses. With his hands still shaking, he placed them carefully back into the spectacle case and returned it to his jacket pocket. He then looked down at the body… his _own_ body. He sat at the side of the old man and wrapped his arms around him, cradling his fallen self in his own arms.

"Thank you…" he said within his tears, "Thank you for showing me this…"

He began to rock back and forth, his arms still wrapped around his lifeless form, as if soothing a sleeping infant. He placed a gentle kiss on the old man's forehead and then rested his right cheek on the top of his head, his tears making patterns on Ezekiel's grey, cold skin.

"Thank you…" he repeated, "I'll see you when I get home…"

He sat under the Tree of Life, cradling his own dead body and waited for The Doctor to arrive…

'Our family chain is broken

And nothing seems the same

But as God calls us in One by One

The chain will link again'


End file.
